ok so i'm kinda freaking out.
Basically everything is working out at iup and all thats really left for me to do is move in.
I'm just so nervous about the whole thing. I'm not looking forward to being so far away from home. It's not the whole being out of the house thing that scares me cuz I think i'm def. gunna be able to handle that lol..its just i've made so many great friends here and i'm just so used to the way things are. I absolutely hate change and i'm scared to start over again.
I feel like it's weird that I'm not as excited to go as all my other friends are. I dont really understand how people can't wait to be as far away as possible. I kinda want it all...to be here with everyone else but have the great college experience at the same time.
And the fact that things are going well with matt again just makes it so much harder. Hes being so supportive with everything...telling me that he'd be willing to talk to me on the phone for as long as i wanted to if i was feeling homesick and come to visit me all the time...and i know he really cares about me again. I know people say you can make relationships work in college but i hafta be realistic ...itd be hard. iup is 5 hours away..and we can still stay really close and hang when i'm home...but i dont know how im gunna be able to deal with only seeing my boyfriend every few months. i can barely go 2 days without seeing him now.
It's just the school seems so perfect. It's completely affordable which is great with my family's financial situation, Its got a great education program and music program. I even have my own 2 room suite with my own bathroom and kitchen to share with my roommate. I just wish it could be closer to home.
This girl even called me yesterday and asked if i wanted to be her roommate...and we talked on the phone for almost 2 hours and it went great cuz we are so much alike but are different at the same time so i know we'll get along great and balance eachother out.
Her name's Kayla and shes a cheerleader lol...but shes not doing cheerleading at iup cuz she wants to concentrate on school.
She doesn't party too often ...she drinks occasionally but def. doesn't mind being the dd cuz she loves staying sober to watch everyone else make fools of themselves.. and she's also not fond of ppl who do drugs.
she says she's def. not a neat freak cuz she has clothes all over her room (like me) and we can both relate with our boy problems cuz she has a 20 yr old boyfriend who she's been on and off with for a while now.
its so scary how perfect this is all goiing...i'm nervous about leaving home and all my friends..i'm nervous about making new friends and being on my own.
I'm def. excited but Im afraid Im not gunna make it.
Doesn't anyone else feel like this....and does the fact that i feel this way mean maybe im making a mistake.
ughh i dunno