he's just not that into you
girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up: if a guy punches you, he likes you, never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. every movie we see, every story we’re told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love; the exception to the rule. but sometimes we’re so focused on finding our happy ending we don’t learn how to read the signs; how to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don’t, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. and maybe a happy ending doesn’t include a guy, maybe... it’s you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. maybe the happy ending is just moving on. or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope.
don't let the "honeys" and the "babys" fool you. his sweet nothings are exactly that. they are much easier to say than "i'm just not that into you." remember, actions speak louder than, "there's no cell reception where i am right now."
he is a man made up entirely of your excuses. and the minute you stop making excuses for him, he will completely disappear from your life.
he will always be able to play the "friend" card on you. he only has to be responsible for the expectations of a friend, rather than the the far greater expectations of a boyfriend. he's got the ultimate situation: a great friend with all the benefits of a girlfriend, whom he can see or not see whenever he wants to. he may be one of your closest friends, but i'm sorry to say ... as a boyfriend, he's just not that into you.
don't be flattered that he misses you. he should miss you. you're deeply missable. however, he's still the same person who just broke up with you. remember, the only reason he can miss you is because he's choosing, every day, not to be with you.
it's very tempting when you really want to be with someone to settle for much, much less--even a vague pathetic facsimile of less--than you would have ever imagined. remember always what you set out to get and please don't settle for less. these guys exist because there are a lot of women out there who allow them to.
hey girl, put down the penis, put your clothes back on, and go directly to your best friend's house. do not find an excuse to stay. do not think that because of all the crazy hotness of it all, it now means that you're meant to be together. yes, break up sex does seem like a good idea, because hey, it's nice to have sex with someone you have these dramatic feelings about. it makes it all, well, dramatic. but now you know. it confuses everything and makes you separate sex and emotions. so now you don't ever have to make that mistake again. got it? he's into the very-bad-idea-that-masquerades-as-a-good-idea, breakup sex. over and out.
he's sniffing for something better, and when he doesn't find it, he gets lonely and comes "home." it's not that he's so into you. it's that he's so not into being alone. don't give him the chance to break up with you for the fourth time. (even the idea of it sounds beneath you, doesn't it?). reset your breakup maximum to one and move on. he doesn't need to be reminded that you're great.
cut your losses and don't waste your time. why stay in some weird dating limbo when you can move on to what will surely be better territory? don't want to hear it? fine. here's the answer you're looking for, "hang in there, baby. he's not the loser everybody's telling you he is. if you wait and keep your mouth shut and call at exactly the right time and anticipate his moods and have no expectations about communication or your own sexual needs, you can have him!" but please don't be surprised if he dumps you or continues to drag you through a completely unsatisfying relationship.
no matter how powerful and real your feelings may be for someone, if that person cannot fully and honestly return them and therefore actively love you back, these feelings mean nothing.
you deserve to be with someone who is nice to you all the time.