(no subject)
also. exposure therapy works. not in the short term when you're on the little step ladder and want to cry and everyone's shouting you're only a foot off the ground real-ax and all you see is everything blurring and the train whistle in your head go go going. it's scary then. (name it, claim it) you want to quit. you want to walk away, run away, not look back even out of curiosity.
but then, maybe, you get to that part where you can lay on your stomach and slow slow slowly inch toward the edge and peer down and you still feel like the air's a little thicker or too clear but you're there. there. here! yup, you. you made it. there's always another mountain to climb, another test to anticipate. but for now, you're doing a little more than you thought you ever could.
and, if you're scared of snakes, can't breathe underwater, maybe someday, little by little, fearful bite by lip biting, squinting, drinking, deep breathing. you do what you have to do to get to where you want to go. and mostly, it turns out.
but then, maybe, you get to that part where you can lay on your stomach and slow slow slowly inch toward the edge and peer down and you still feel like the air's a little thicker or too clear but you're there. there. here! yup, you. you made it. there's always another mountain to climb, another test to anticipate. but for now, you're doing a little more than you thought you ever could.
and, if you're scared of snakes, can't breathe underwater, maybe someday, little by little, fearful bite by lip biting, squinting, drinking, deep breathing. you do what you have to do to get to where you want to go. and mostly, it turns out.