Wrong, Chapter 2
Matsumoto, Iba and Renji are the first to arrive at the pub that evening. They sit outside, around a wooden table, drinking sake and discussing the new and troubling relationship forming within their group.
'S'all going to end in tears.' is Iba's contribution.
'Yes, but whose, that's the question really, isn't it? pouts an avid Matsumoto.
All three sit back in the evening sunlight and consider.
'All parties concerned.' Iba comes out with triumphantly.
'Yes, probably, but ultimately is what I mean,' says Matsumoto.
'Iba could still be right,' puts in Renji.
'Break-up all round, you mean? But that's unlikely, isn't it? Someone's going to pick up the pieces.'
Iba suggests placing bets on the outcome, and after a few moments of pretending to be scandalised at his insensitivity Matsumoto draws up a list of the possible outcomes. She reads it out.
'Yumichika and Ikkaku together and Kira and Shuuhei together. Yumichika and Ikkaku together, Kira and Shuuhei apart. Ikkaku and Kira together, Yumichika and Shuuhei together - '
Renji and Iba shake their heads knowingly.
'Ikkaku and Kira together, Yumichika desolate and Shuuhei fancy-free. Yumichika and Shuuhei together, Ikkaku desolate, Kira desolate. Yumichika and Kira toge - '
'No, no,' chorus Renji and Iba, and Renji continues, 'Yumichika really can't stand Kira. That's never going to happen.'
'I think you've got all the options already', says Iba. 'Only why doesn't Shuu ever get desolate?'
'Well, because I just don't think he's that type.'
Renji chooses option one, not wanting to have a vested interest in the unhappiness of his friends. Iba is trying to decide between the last two when Shuuhei himself appears, and Matsumoto quickly hides the list. He doesn't appear to be in bad spirits, but is closely followed by Ikkaku and Yumichika. They appear together, but the tension between them is palpable. Yumichika seems very reserved and sits as far as he can from Shuuhei. Then they are joined by Kira, who sits on Ikkaku's other side. Everyone feels Yumichika's reiatsu change.
At first Kira is quite restrained - he does seem to have been affected by their encounter earlier. But after about half an hour he is irritating Yumichika so much that he has to excuse himself. He makes his way to the gents and sits there furiously for as long as he can bear. Perhaps he should ask Shuuhei to help him. Perhaps for some sexual favour he would agree to try and take Kira back and off their hands. Yumichika can't really stand the toilet cubicle very long, and he soon makes his way back outside. But as he returns to the table Kira jumps up and comes to meet him.
Yumichika freezes in horror as Kira takes his arm and asks if they could have a private word. It's the last thing he wants to do, though he supposes he could possibly turn the situation to his advantage. He looks coldly at Kira's hand on his arm, but Kira doesn't let go, and urges him off towards the practise grounds behind the building. Yumichika looks back at Ikkaku and widens his eyes, signalling his discomfort, but Ikkaku makes no move to help.
'Well?' Yumichika says, as Kira finally stops and lets go of him. He fixes him with a basilisk stare.
'Look, Yumichika-san,' says Kira in a horrible gentle friendly tone. 'I feel that we haven't really got off on the best footing - '
'No, perhaps not,' Yumichika breaks in sweetly, 'but considering you've stolen my boyfriend perhaps it's the best that can be expected.'
Kira was not ready for such a direct approach, and is taken aback. 'That - that's not what Ikkaku says,' he said awkwardly. 'Ikkaku said you two had some arrangement...'
'If he said I was just some fuck-buddy I don't want to hear it.' Yumichika injects his tone with bitterness and reproach. 'Have a bit of sensitivity, Kira. It's obviously not how our relationship seems to me.'
'There's no need for things to be unpleasant between us.' says Kira patiently. 'I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings, but this really means a lot to me and I think Ikkaku feels the same way - '
Yumichika interrupts again. 'Are you really warning me off, Kira? This should really be the other way around. I don't believe you know what being important to somebody is! Just how much of a man-whore are you? How many people have to comfort you with their cock before you'll be satisfied?!'
Kira is shocked, and, yes, angry now. Good, thinks Yumichika. 'I warn you,' he says softly, 'I won't give him up easily, not like you've abandoned Shuuhei - did you know he made a move on me, by the way? And don't think filling your eyes with crocodile tears is going to work on me - I've always found your eyes exceptionally ugly.'
Kira stands rooted to the spot, unable to believe that anyone would say these things to him after all he's been through. And Yumichika hasn't finished yet. 'How long are you going to fuck your way round Seireitei, with no thought for the friendships you smash along the way. Shuuhei and Ikkaku used to be good friends as well - now they can barely look at each other, because of you.'
'Stop saying these things!' Kira bursts out. Before he's had time to think it through, he's drawn Wabisuke on Yumichika.
Yumichika has heard about this sword from Renji, and makes no attempt to draw Fuji Kujaku. Instead he hits Kira with a viciously placed ball of Kidou energy. It's a slightly unusual spell and Kira hasn't expected the 11th squad member to be good with Kidou, and only just manages to deflect it with his sword. They skid away from each other and Yumichika fires of several more in quick succession. One of them hits him, but doesn't seem to cause any visible damage. It hurts a lot though, and Kira begins to go for Yumichika seriously with his zanpakoutou. He takes a few more hits, but Yumichika is definitely playing defensively now. He's breathing hard - his incantationless spells seem to have taken it out of him. In a few more moves Kira has Yumichika pinned against the steps that lead out of the training ground with Wabisuke at his throat. He realises a moment later that he's miscalculated, though, as there's a ball of white light at Yumichika's fingertips that it's going to be impossible to evade now, and at this close range...
Yumichika lets Kira get the blade to his throat and is about to hit him with the kidou he’d been preparing for this moment when he feels the combined reiatsu of Ikkaku, Shuuhei and Renji approaching fast. He hesitates, then lets the kidou dissipate instead as he sees them come around the corner and into full view. In moments the three of them have flash-stepped over, and Shuuhei and Renji have pulled Kira off him. Ikkaku looks at Kira in disbelief as he helps Yumichika to his feet.
'I thought you wanted to talk to him!' he says. Kira's shoulders droop and Wabisuke returns to normal as he realises just how bad the situation must've looked.
Tears well in his eyes as Renji says severely, 'Should a fukutaichou really do that to a 5th seat, Kira?' He should've realised that Yumichika, a master of self image, would turn this to his advantage.
Shuuhei adds, 'He hadn't even drawn!'
'He was using kidou...' Kira protests feebly. But they all know how good he is with kidou himself and it doesn't seem likely that Yumichika, an 11th man, would choose it over his sword.
Everyone looks down at Yumichika's empty sword hand, and sees that blood has begun to seep through his arm protector. Ikkaku catches up his hand and strips off the orange fabric. 'I told you you should've got that fixed properly. It's reopened. You said you fixed it!'
'It would've been OK if I'd left it alone.' Yumichika replies. He watches blood trickle into his palm. 'My reiatsu wasn't quite as high as usual today and I couldn't make it heal completely earlier...'
Kira sheathes his sword and begins damage limitation. 'I'm sorry, Yumichika.' he says. 'I really didn't bring you out here intending to fight, but...' his voice trails off.
Yumichika decides he doesn't need to play the innocent any more. 'Kira,' he says angrily. 'Don't drag me out here, patronise me, warn me off what's already mine, draw your sword on me and then tell me you didn't want to fight.' His fist clenches and the blood begins to flow faster.
'Look.' says Ikkaku suddenly, not looking at either of them. 'I'm going to take you over to 4th and and make sure you get that properly fixed, and then we can come back here and we'll all have a civilised drink together and enjoy the rest of the evening. Sound like a plan?' He doesn't give Yumichika time to refuse, but grabs him by the shoulders and flashsteps them away together.