Fic: The Bald Knight Rises (3/3)
Title: The Bald Knight Rises
Author(s): lilac28
Pairing(s)/Character(s): Bane/Talia
Summary: Bane races to free his love Talia after a bank robbery gone bad leads to her arrest. Making matters worse is her distant father Ra's al Ghul, the general incompetence of his henchmen, that emo nuisance Batman, and the fact that no one can understand what he's saying.
Rating: PG-13
Warning(s): Mutilation, delicious violence, mentions of sex, and unapologetic crackiness
Word Count: ~2k
Notes Slight AU where Ra's al Ghul still lives, Bane was never exiled, and Batman never retired. This fic is already complete, I just thought it would be more fun and digestible in three parts.
The bomb went off at exactly 12:59 pm on the next day. By 1 pm, downtown Gotham City had exploded into chaos. Thousands of protesters and citizens erupted into a terrified frenzy, the air thick with fear toxin from the detonated bomb.
Those who ran to help were sucked into the maelstrom of horror. People clawed at their own eyes to stop the frightening images. Cops sat mewling on street corners, too afraid to even begin to think about trying to restore order. The sounds of traffic and daily business were replaced with wails of panic.
Across town, Bane really didn't give a fuck. His whole world had narrowed down to this. This rescue mission. Nothing else mattered. Not the lives of his men, not even his own life.
He raced towards Blackgate prison in Ra's al Ghul's sports car, now rife with dents and scratches from Bane's purposely irresponsible driving. The car was no doubt reported stolen by Henri Ducard in order to keep up appearances, not that there was a cop in the city who could do something about it right now.
Barsad sat to his right; John Blake was squeezed in the back. They led a small convoy of trucks consisting of the rescue team, made up of the least incompetent men that Bane could find.
They tore through the outer entrance, easily killing the guards with their superior firepower. Just as they approached the main entrance of the prison Barsad screamed, "Sir! Incoming!"
Bane spun the car around as some sort of projectile struck the front, tearing off the grill and leaving black scorch marks on the pristine red hood. Ra's al Ghul would not be pleased.
Bane stopped the car and stepped out, fury replaced by confusion as he took in the cloaked figure sitting on a tricked out motorbike before him. The Batman.
"I broke you. How have you come back?"
Batman rumbled something that sounded like "actually, you just threw my back out", but Bane couldn't be sure. And people said he was hard to understand.
"Let's not stand on ceremony here, Mr. Wayne."
And there it was. The reveal. The stunned shock apparent behind a practiced, stony veneer. Batman was Bruce Wayne. He should have bet Talia money on it. Or sexual favors.
Bane used Batman's surprise as an opportunity to lunge at him, punching him in the face repeatedly. They grappled, punched, and kicked each other like savages, both driven to protect something they loved. The men merely looked on, letting Bane have his revenge while enjoying the show. Watching Bane kick ass was a perk of the job, as long as it wasn't your ass getting the kicking.
Although he could have pounded on the misguided costumed hero all day, he was a man on a schedule. He was also a man who had spent the entire night watching every available piece of footage of Batman, including the tapes of the GCPD's interrogation room eight years previously.
So rather than continue the fight, Bane caught Batman in a headlock, pressed his mask to the Caped Crusader's, and whispered a few choice sentences into his year.
The fighting stopped as Batman freed himself and stepped back with wide eyes.
"You monster. You wouldn't."
"Oh but I would, Bruce! And I have! I have both the means and the desire."
"You're lying."
"Is that a risk you're willing to take?"
Batman stared. An interminable silence stretched between them. The men look at each other, puzzled. Even Barsad seemed confused.
Finally Batman jumped on his Batcycle and tore around the side of the prison, leaving Bane standing triumphant in front of his befuddled men.
"Come. Let us continue."
They entered the prison and killed the last few guards trying to make a desperate last stand in the front hallway of the prison. Nothing could stop them now. The electricity was out, both Gotham's main grid and the prison's backup generators blown by planted bombs.
The team snaked their way through hallways and corridors, any gates or locked doors taken care of with Barsad's bag of plastic explosives. Bane motioned his men to hurry when they reached the entrance to the giant, multi-level room that housed the cells.
"Quickly! Before he comes back."
"Sir," Barsad said. "What....what did you say to him that made him run away like that?"
"I told him that we were just a distraction, and that there was another team in the solitary wing whose mission was to free the Joker."
"The...the..." Barsad couldn't even spit out the name. "The clown is being kept here!?!"
"Who knows! He disappeared eight years ago after he was arrested. No one knows where he really is, apparently not even Batman."
"And he believed you!?!"
"He had no choice. I am the lesser of two evils. Besides, have you seen those interrogation tapes? Lots of weird tension. There was definitely something else going on there."
"Meaning?"
"Meaning I was wondering what would break first, his spirit or his heterosexuality!"
They stepped back as Bane detonated an explosive, ripping the enforced door apart and opening a hole to the main prison cells.
The cells in Blackgate Prison existed on two floors, stretching down an endless hallway that was now in a state of utter bedlam. The locks on the cells were electric, and although they were designed to stick in the locked position in case of a power failure, without guards to stop them some of the stronger prisoners were able to break free.
Dead bodies already littered the floor as prisoners struggled to escape. Bane and his team were greeted by a cacophony of screams and cheers as others threw themselves at the bars of their cells. There were pieces of pillow stuffing floating everywhere.
Bane raised a closed fist against the first man who approached him, crushing his nose with one blow. He turned to Blake.
"Where is she?"
"Second level! Number 34!"
Their team formed a tight unit, easily dispatching the few men stupid enough to run at them. They climbed the stairs to the second level and Bane started running. Number 65.....64....63....
Bane ran faster, hammering people out of his way. She needed him. She needed her protector.
51....50.....The only sound his labored, machine-like breathing. If something happened to her, he would never forgive himself. He didn't even think he could go on.
37...36...35.....Oh God.....
In front of the broken gates to cell 34 lay a slender figure face down in a pool of blood, long dark hair spilling over the orange jumpsuit. No no no
Bane collapsed to his knees, cradling the person in his arms. It was a woman, the bones of her beautiful face broken and swollen. She wasn't breathing.
Talia. His Talia. Bane clutched at her and howled with grief. It was too late. Strangled wails crawled out of his dry throat. Too late....
"Bane! Bane!" Barsad was shaking him. "Bane, it's not her."
"W-what?"
"It's not her, boss!"
Bane pulled away from the dead woman and inspected her again. Her hair was too long, her face wasn't right. Fuck.
He tossed her aside and ran to cell 34. The gate was barely pried open. Bane forced it open further just in time to see Talia slit the throat of a man three times her size. There were two more bodies by her feet.
Her eyes widened when she saw him.
"Bane!" Talia screamed and leapt into his arms. "I knew. I knew you'd come for me."
And there in a dingy blood and cum splattered prison cell, without giving it another thought, Bane whipped the mask off and pressed his ruined lips to hers. The first real kiss of his adult life that he could remember.
It was clumsy, half-numb, and awkward. Talia's breath was terrible, like prison food and adrenaline. It was the sweetest thing he had ever tasted.
It felt like only moments before the first twinges of pain traveled across his jaw, forcing him to step back and strap the mask on again. Talia helped him, a rare beautiful smile shining through her tears. She kissed his exposed cheek.
"What took you so long?"
"Traffic. Batman. Your father. I came as soon as I could, my love. I thought I was rescuing you, although it does not look like you needed it!"
One of the men on the floor breathed his last death rattle, drooling blood on himself as his life finally expired.
"Oh Bane, my dearest friend." Talia took his hand. "I'll always need you. Always."
He scooped her into a fierce hug and spun her around, ignoring the stunned looks of the men behind him. Whether it was from seeing him with his mask off or seeing the bloody scene that Talia had created, he really didn't care. He didn't even care when he saw Barsad elbow one of the other men and whisper.
"See? I told you he wasn't in the friend zone."
Talia was clutching on to him like a life jacket. "Can we go now?"
"Yes, my dear. Let us depart. I believe we've overstayed our welcome in Gotham City!"
The group ran for the exit and back to the cars, indiscriminately killing anyone who got in their way. Talia stuck to Bane like she was eight years old again, and he didn't mind in the slightest.
The convoy split up after leaving the prison, with al Ghul's men going in one direction and Bane, Barsad, Talia, and John Blake blazing across the city for the highway in the battered sports car.
"Glad to have you back, ma'am." Barsad put a friendly hand on Talia's shoulder, which she covered with her own. He was always her favorite of Bane's men too.
Bane didn't mind. Strong relations between upper management were good, and he was still convinced Barsad was way gay anyway. He was more interested in the other silent man in the back. Bane tossed him a wad of bills.
"As promised, John Blake. Thank you for your service to the cause."
"Thank you, sir."
"The cameras at Blackgate were out. Your cover was not blown. Will you be returning to the police?"
"I don't think so, sir. A little too much structure for me."
"Well," Bane said. "How would you like a job? I have a lieutenant's position open, under Barsad of course."
"I....yes....yes I would like that very much. Could we just....make one quick stop before we go? Our Lady of Mercy, it's on 64 Elliott Street just around the corner. I need to drop off this money."
Bane indulged him, too happy to have Talia back to say no to anything.
"I recognize this place," said Talia when they stopped. "This is an orphanage."
"I grew up here. This will only take a minute."
"Aha," Bane said. "Giving your payment to an orphanage? A regular Robin Hood!"
While they waited, Talia seemed to notice the damage to the car for the first time. In addition to the many scratches, it was now starting to make a strange clunking noise.
"Bane, what did you do to my father's car?"
"Well, um, my dear. There were some....complications. You see, a car such as this is actually not made to--"
"It was Batman." Barsad interrupted.
Bane looked at him in the mirror gratefully. "Yes, yes it was Batman. Something.....like that."
Blake jumped back in the car. "Done! Thank you. I'm ready."
Talia raised her eyebrows. "Batman. I see. Well, father will be able to buy another one anyway. With this."
She reached into her bra and, much the complete surprise of the men in the car, produced the largest and most extravagant diamond any of them had ever seen.
Astonished, Bane took the stone and turned it in his hands, watching it throw rainbows on every surface around them. "The Gotham Diamond. But how? I thought you said it wasn't there?"
"It wasn't. Someone else had gotten there first. A master cat burglar. Batman must have gotten her right after I was arrested. I'm not sure how she hid it from the cops but it was on her when they put her in Blackgate with me. I stole it off her right before those men broke into our cell and...."
The dead woman in front of her cell. Bane closed the diamond back in her hand. Talia was cold, cruel, but not without a sense of justice. Watching those men kill another woman must have been horrible.
"It's over now."
A police car raced past them. Gotham struggling to get control of itself again.
"I believe that's our cue. Let's go. We can get your father another insecure man car somewhere else. Perhaps he won't even know the difference!"
Talia was still holding his hand. "I don't know if we can fool him that much, Bane. This is custom made. What if we can't find the same color?"
"Then we'll adapt, my love." Bane cupped her cheek in his hand. "We'll adapt."
He threw the car into gear and took off, making sure to hit every pothole along the way.
The End
Author(s): lilac28
Pairing(s)/Character(s): Bane/Talia
Summary: Bane races to free his love Talia after a bank robbery gone bad leads to her arrest. Making matters worse is her distant father Ra's al Ghul, the general incompetence of his henchmen, that emo nuisance Batman, and the fact that no one can understand what he's saying.
Rating: PG-13
Warning(s): Mutilation, delicious violence, mentions of sex, and unapologetic crackiness
Word Count: ~2k
Notes Slight AU where Ra's al Ghul still lives, Bane was never exiled, and Batman never retired. This fic is already complete, I just thought it would be more fun and digestible in three parts.
The bomb went off at exactly 12:59 pm on the next day. By 1 pm, downtown Gotham City had exploded into chaos. Thousands of protesters and citizens erupted into a terrified frenzy, the air thick with fear toxin from the detonated bomb.
Those who ran to help were sucked into the maelstrom of horror. People clawed at their own eyes to stop the frightening images. Cops sat mewling on street corners, too afraid to even begin to think about trying to restore order. The sounds of traffic and daily business were replaced with wails of panic.
Across town, Bane really didn't give a fuck. His whole world had narrowed down to this. This rescue mission. Nothing else mattered. Not the lives of his men, not even his own life.
He raced towards Blackgate prison in Ra's al Ghul's sports car, now rife with dents and scratches from Bane's purposely irresponsible driving. The car was no doubt reported stolen by Henri Ducard in order to keep up appearances, not that there was a cop in the city who could do something about it right now.
Barsad sat to his right; John Blake was squeezed in the back. They led a small convoy of trucks consisting of the rescue team, made up of the least incompetent men that Bane could find.
They tore through the outer entrance, easily killing the guards with their superior firepower. Just as they approached the main entrance of the prison Barsad screamed, "Sir! Incoming!"
Bane spun the car around as some sort of projectile struck the front, tearing off the grill and leaving black scorch marks on the pristine red hood. Ra's al Ghul would not be pleased.
Bane stopped the car and stepped out, fury replaced by confusion as he took in the cloaked figure sitting on a tricked out motorbike before him. The Batman.
"I broke you. How have you come back?"
Batman rumbled something that sounded like "actually, you just threw my back out", but Bane couldn't be sure. And people said he was hard to understand.
"Let's not stand on ceremony here, Mr. Wayne."
And there it was. The reveal. The stunned shock apparent behind a practiced, stony veneer. Batman was Bruce Wayne. He should have bet Talia money on it. Or sexual favors.
Bane used Batman's surprise as an opportunity to lunge at him, punching him in the face repeatedly. They grappled, punched, and kicked each other like savages, both driven to protect something they loved. The men merely looked on, letting Bane have his revenge while enjoying the show. Watching Bane kick ass was a perk of the job, as long as it wasn't your ass getting the kicking.
Although he could have pounded on the misguided costumed hero all day, he was a man on a schedule. He was also a man who had spent the entire night watching every available piece of footage of Batman, including the tapes of the GCPD's interrogation room eight years previously.
So rather than continue the fight, Bane caught Batman in a headlock, pressed his mask to the Caped Crusader's, and whispered a few choice sentences into his year.
The fighting stopped as Batman freed himself and stepped back with wide eyes.
"You monster. You wouldn't."
"Oh but I would, Bruce! And I have! I have both the means and the desire."
"You're lying."
"Is that a risk you're willing to take?"
Batman stared. An interminable silence stretched between them. The men look at each other, puzzled. Even Barsad seemed confused.
Finally Batman jumped on his Batcycle and tore around the side of the prison, leaving Bane standing triumphant in front of his befuddled men.
"Come. Let us continue."
They entered the prison and killed the last few guards trying to make a desperate last stand in the front hallway of the prison. Nothing could stop them now. The electricity was out, both Gotham's main grid and the prison's backup generators blown by planted bombs.
The team snaked their way through hallways and corridors, any gates or locked doors taken care of with Barsad's bag of plastic explosives. Bane motioned his men to hurry when they reached the entrance to the giant, multi-level room that housed the cells.
"Quickly! Before he comes back."
"Sir," Barsad said. "What....what did you say to him that made him run away like that?"
"I told him that we were just a distraction, and that there was another team in the solitary wing whose mission was to free the Joker."
"The...the..." Barsad couldn't even spit out the name. "The clown is being kept here!?!"
"Who knows! He disappeared eight years ago after he was arrested. No one knows where he really is, apparently not even Batman."
"And he believed you!?!"
"He had no choice. I am the lesser of two evils. Besides, have you seen those interrogation tapes? Lots of weird tension. There was definitely something else going on there."
"Meaning?"
"Meaning I was wondering what would break first, his spirit or his heterosexuality!"
They stepped back as Bane detonated an explosive, ripping the enforced door apart and opening a hole to the main prison cells.
The cells in Blackgate Prison existed on two floors, stretching down an endless hallway that was now in a state of utter bedlam. The locks on the cells were electric, and although they were designed to stick in the locked position in case of a power failure, without guards to stop them some of the stronger prisoners were able to break free.
Dead bodies already littered the floor as prisoners struggled to escape. Bane and his team were greeted by a cacophony of screams and cheers as others threw themselves at the bars of their cells. There were pieces of pillow stuffing floating everywhere.
Bane raised a closed fist against the first man who approached him, crushing his nose with one blow. He turned to Blake.
"Where is she?"
"Second level! Number 34!"
Their team formed a tight unit, easily dispatching the few men stupid enough to run at them. They climbed the stairs to the second level and Bane started running. Number 65.....64....63....
Bane ran faster, hammering people out of his way. She needed him. She needed her protector.
51....50.....The only sound his labored, machine-like breathing. If something happened to her, he would never forgive himself. He didn't even think he could go on.
37...36...35.....Oh God.....
In front of the broken gates to cell 34 lay a slender figure face down in a pool of blood, long dark hair spilling over the orange jumpsuit. No no no
Bane collapsed to his knees, cradling the person in his arms. It was a woman, the bones of her beautiful face broken and swollen. She wasn't breathing.
Talia. His Talia. Bane clutched at her and howled with grief. It was too late. Strangled wails crawled out of his dry throat. Too late....
"Bane! Bane!" Barsad was shaking him. "Bane, it's not her."
"W-what?"
"It's not her, boss!"
Bane pulled away from the dead woman and inspected her again. Her hair was too long, her face wasn't right. Fuck.
He tossed her aside and ran to cell 34. The gate was barely pried open. Bane forced it open further just in time to see Talia slit the throat of a man three times her size. There were two more bodies by her feet.
Her eyes widened when she saw him.
"Bane!" Talia screamed and leapt into his arms. "I knew. I knew you'd come for me."
And there in a dingy blood and cum splattered prison cell, without giving it another thought, Bane whipped the mask off and pressed his ruined lips to hers. The first real kiss of his adult life that he could remember.
It was clumsy, half-numb, and awkward. Talia's breath was terrible, like prison food and adrenaline. It was the sweetest thing he had ever tasted.
It felt like only moments before the first twinges of pain traveled across his jaw, forcing him to step back and strap the mask on again. Talia helped him, a rare beautiful smile shining through her tears. She kissed his exposed cheek.
"What took you so long?"
"Traffic. Batman. Your father. I came as soon as I could, my love. I thought I was rescuing you, although it does not look like you needed it!"
One of the men on the floor breathed his last death rattle, drooling blood on himself as his life finally expired.
"Oh Bane, my dearest friend." Talia took his hand. "I'll always need you. Always."
He scooped her into a fierce hug and spun her around, ignoring the stunned looks of the men behind him. Whether it was from seeing him with his mask off or seeing the bloody scene that Talia had created, he really didn't care. He didn't even care when he saw Barsad elbow one of the other men and whisper.
"See? I told you he wasn't in the friend zone."
Talia was clutching on to him like a life jacket. "Can we go now?"
"Yes, my dear. Let us depart. I believe we've overstayed our welcome in Gotham City!"
The group ran for the exit and back to the cars, indiscriminately killing anyone who got in their way. Talia stuck to Bane like she was eight years old again, and he didn't mind in the slightest.
The convoy split up after leaving the prison, with al Ghul's men going in one direction and Bane, Barsad, Talia, and John Blake blazing across the city for the highway in the battered sports car.
"Glad to have you back, ma'am." Barsad put a friendly hand on Talia's shoulder, which she covered with her own. He was always her favorite of Bane's men too.
Bane didn't mind. Strong relations between upper management were good, and he was still convinced Barsad was way gay anyway. He was more interested in the other silent man in the back. Bane tossed him a wad of bills.
"As promised, John Blake. Thank you for your service to the cause."
"Thank you, sir."
"The cameras at Blackgate were out. Your cover was not blown. Will you be returning to the police?"
"I don't think so, sir. A little too much structure for me."
"Well," Bane said. "How would you like a job? I have a lieutenant's position open, under Barsad of course."
"I....yes....yes I would like that very much. Could we just....make one quick stop before we go? Our Lady of Mercy, it's on 64 Elliott Street just around the corner. I need to drop off this money."
Bane indulged him, too happy to have Talia back to say no to anything.
"I recognize this place," said Talia when they stopped. "This is an orphanage."
"I grew up here. This will only take a minute."
"Aha," Bane said. "Giving your payment to an orphanage? A regular Robin Hood!"
While they waited, Talia seemed to notice the damage to the car for the first time. In addition to the many scratches, it was now starting to make a strange clunking noise.
"Bane, what did you do to my father's car?"
"Well, um, my dear. There were some....complications. You see, a car such as this is actually not made to--"
"It was Batman." Barsad interrupted.
Bane looked at him in the mirror gratefully. "Yes, yes it was Batman. Something.....like that."
Blake jumped back in the car. "Done! Thank you. I'm ready."
Talia raised her eyebrows. "Batman. I see. Well, father will be able to buy another one anyway. With this."
She reached into her bra and, much the complete surprise of the men in the car, produced the largest and most extravagant diamond any of them had ever seen.
Astonished, Bane took the stone and turned it in his hands, watching it throw rainbows on every surface around them. "The Gotham Diamond. But how? I thought you said it wasn't there?"
"It wasn't. Someone else had gotten there first. A master cat burglar. Batman must have gotten her right after I was arrested. I'm not sure how she hid it from the cops but it was on her when they put her in Blackgate with me. I stole it off her right before those men broke into our cell and...."
The dead woman in front of her cell. Bane closed the diamond back in her hand. Talia was cold, cruel, but not without a sense of justice. Watching those men kill another woman must have been horrible.
"It's over now."
A police car raced past them. Gotham struggling to get control of itself again.
"I believe that's our cue. Let's go. We can get your father another insecure man car somewhere else. Perhaps he won't even know the difference!"
Talia was still holding his hand. "I don't know if we can fool him that much, Bane. This is custom made. What if we can't find the same color?"
"Then we'll adapt, my love." Bane cupped her cheek in his hand. "We'll adapt."
He threw the car into gear and took off, making sure to hit every pothole along the way.
The End