the crazy thing called love.
So, me thinking again.
Well, I'm getting more and more in touch again, with that girl I fell in love with (and still am) a few years ago, even though I tried to forget my feelings ... We are writing messages, we see each other regurlarly on Friday evenings... And the more I see her, the more my feelings are coming back ... But I couldn't bear breaking contact to her again. That simply wouldn't do. I need to see her, need to write with her, need to see her laughing, need to hear her voice.. .__. And it hurts all the same time.
The crazy thing that's called love.
I can't explain it... can't explain my feelings. But I can't understand them all the same, even though I wish I could.
But that's what I feared, that my feelings won't lessen with the time... Because they didn't. They rather grew...
We write, and it's great, real fun and it's defeating some of the emptiness inside myself. But then, suddenly, it's getting awkward. I don't know what to say anymore, and the lack of her response is the sign for me, that she doesn't know what to write, either.
Anyway, I won't - No, I CANNOT tell her. Never. Because then, everything would start anew. It would hurt even more, and I would hurt her again. And that's something I don't want to do ever again.
So, this time, my feelings will stay hidden. It's better not to risk that friendship we have, again, it's too fragile. And even if it will get stronger again, I won't risk it. No way.