The Famous Night of March 11th, 2006...
Try to follow along…
So I pick up Kristen at around 8 tonight. We go to Christina Wan’s, a great Chinese place near Shuck ‘n Dive. We eat an utterly fulfilling meal, vent about friends and boys, read our fortune cookies, and head on our way. We drive all the way up to Dairy Queen, only to find that the line is insanely long. We decide to zip by McDonald’s, instead. Waiting in that line is useless. We haul ass in the completely opposite direction and pick up McFlurrys. A semi-cute guy there takes our order, and semi-flirts with us at the drive-thru window. I love it when this happens. Anyway, so as I drive, Kristen spoon-feeds me my McFlurry. In an effort to catch an M&M that is about to fall on my clean Banana Republic tee, I almost run a sign over. We fucking blast Sum 41’s “Fat Lip” and scream it at the top of our lungs. I think Kristen has a new favorite song. We arrive in Kristen’s driveway, alive and with my car in one solid piece. I realize that my cell phone is not in my purse. It’s almost 10:00, I haven’t spoken with my parents after I walked out the door 2 hours earlier, and I can’t find my new $300 cell phone. Nice, Lauren. Real smooth. I assume that I must have left my cell on the restaurant table. We haul ass back to Christina Wan’s. A waiter, waitress, and two bus boys frantically search the kitchen. They come back saying they’ve found nothing. They then decide to check the laundry basket, in case the phone was accidentally thrown into it along with the tablecloth. They again come back to say they’ve found nothing. My heart is racing. My parents must be worried. I ask Kristen to check my car again. She comes back and says it’s definitely not in there. The cute host suggests calling my cell; I remember that it was on silent, and that will do no good whatsoever. I leave my room line number with the hostess in case my cell turns up. I run out to the car, almost in tears. Kristen frantically searches the car again. I search under the passanger seat like a madwoman. I feel something huge and rubbery, almost like a…hell, I don’t even KNOW what. I feel hot; my heart is racing. I’ve lost my $300 cell phone. It’s gone. Then I feel it, in all its hot-pink Motorola greatness, in my palm. It must have rolled out of my purse and under the passenger seat. Kristen is a bad car-searcher. But the phone is dead. Oh well, at least I found it, right? I call the house on Kristen’s phone. They’re mad. They were worried. That was to be expected. I’m dead. I speed home like I’ve never sped before. I drop Kristen off. My parents are going to KILL me. I’m slaughtered. Well, at least I found my phone. I knew I didn’t leave it in the restaurant. I pull into the garage. My heart is still racing. I coolly walk inside. Dad calls me “sweetie”. That must be a good sign. He tells me that mom was frantic. I feel awful. I apologize to mom. As the only baby, I can see why they were worried. They seem to be over it for the most part. That’s good. So I sit down at my computer to check my MySpace and eat my melted McFlurry.
Best fucking McFlurry I’ve ever had.
Best friends make everything better. I love you, Kristen <3
Goodnight, world.
So I pick up Kristen at around 8 tonight. We go to Christina Wan’s, a great Chinese place near Shuck ‘n Dive. We eat an utterly fulfilling meal, vent about friends and boys, read our fortune cookies, and head on our way. We drive all the way up to Dairy Queen, only to find that the line is insanely long. We decide to zip by McDonald’s, instead. Waiting in that line is useless. We haul ass in the completely opposite direction and pick up McFlurrys. A semi-cute guy there takes our order, and semi-flirts with us at the drive-thru window. I love it when this happens. Anyway, so as I drive, Kristen spoon-feeds me my McFlurry. In an effort to catch an M&M that is about to fall on my clean Banana Republic tee, I almost run a sign over. We fucking blast Sum 41’s “Fat Lip” and scream it at the top of our lungs. I think Kristen has a new favorite song. We arrive in Kristen’s driveway, alive and with my car in one solid piece. I realize that my cell phone is not in my purse. It’s almost 10:00, I haven’t spoken with my parents after I walked out the door 2 hours earlier, and I can’t find my new $300 cell phone. Nice, Lauren. Real smooth. I assume that I must have left my cell on the restaurant table. We haul ass back to Christina Wan’s. A waiter, waitress, and two bus boys frantically search the kitchen. They come back saying they’ve found nothing. They then decide to check the laundry basket, in case the phone was accidentally thrown into it along with the tablecloth. They again come back to say they’ve found nothing. My heart is racing. My parents must be worried. I ask Kristen to check my car again. She comes back and says it’s definitely not in there. The cute host suggests calling my cell; I remember that it was on silent, and that will do no good whatsoever. I leave my room line number with the hostess in case my cell turns up. I run out to the car, almost in tears. Kristen frantically searches the car again. I search under the passanger seat like a madwoman. I feel something huge and rubbery, almost like a…hell, I don’t even KNOW what. I feel hot; my heart is racing. I’ve lost my $300 cell phone. It’s gone. Then I feel it, in all its hot-pink Motorola greatness, in my palm. It must have rolled out of my purse and under the passenger seat. Kristen is a bad car-searcher. But the phone is dead. Oh well, at least I found it, right? I call the house on Kristen’s phone. They’re mad. They were worried. That was to be expected. I’m dead. I speed home like I’ve never sped before. I drop Kristen off. My parents are going to KILL me. I’m slaughtered. Well, at least I found my phone. I knew I didn’t leave it in the restaurant. I pull into the garage. My heart is still racing. I coolly walk inside. Dad calls me “sweetie”. That must be a good sign. He tells me that mom was frantic. I feel awful. I apologize to mom. As the only baby, I can see why they were worried. They seem to be over it for the most part. That’s good. So I sit down at my computer to check my MySpace and eat my melted McFlurry.
Best fucking McFlurry I’ve ever had.
Best friends make everything better. I love you, Kristen <3
Goodnight, world.