(no subject)

[lil_redhed]

i dont know what the future hold for me.

at allllllll.
i dont know where i am or what im doing

im lost in my regular surroundings

im lost in myself.

i hate uncertainty. but uncertainty in every aspect of life is scarier than i could ever imagine. and ive lost...myself.

i dont know who i am anymore.

all of you who knew kristy dont know kristy now.

i dont know who this me is.
and i dont know where this me is headed.

i dont know what to do when i dont know who i am.

i dont know what to do when all i know is that i want to lay down and die.
i just want the torture to end.

but i am my torture. i am the cause of everything i have or will put myself through. and i cant get away from myself.

i dont know what to do anymore. i just want out.

i want out so bad i dont know what to do.

i dont know anything.

anything.

the one thing i had throughout all the shit in my life was knowing who i was. knowing MY values and how i act. but i dont anymore. i dont know who the fuck i am or what the fuck im still doing on this planet.

i. dont. know.

all the help in the world cant save me from myself.
please let me be free...please just let me out