Utah Rant (#1)
So I'm here in Utah and I cannot wait until next Saturday when we leave. I'm not cut out for this life anymore. For one thing, I really miss Dan. I hate saying it because I think it sounds desperate and lame but I'm not desperate or lame so I guess as much as I dislike it I really don't care. It doesn't help that every single person I see asks about him or if I've talked to him lately or how he's doing. For another thing, Danielle is finally home from her quarter at sea and I so want to hang out with her and talk that it's killing me to wait another week. My Aunt Lori (who no one can stand) has decided to come out here for vacation at the same time as us (only until Tuesday) and everyone is having this huge fit over it and I'm just like "whatever" because what can anyone really do? I'm so sick of hearing about it since it's all anyone's talked about since Friday night when we got here. It will be talked about until we leave too; there is just no escaping it. For the last thing (which apparently only Andrew and I fully understand), Cara is being such a pain (aka being Cara) that as hard as I have been trying to stay out of her way and not get into it with her, I can't help but want to throw her on the ground and give her the beating she deserves. She sunk her nails into my hand yesterday just because I sort of whacked her on the arm (not hard) when she belched because she had been belching all day and I was tired of it. I didn't even do anything when she clawed me; I just sat there and took it because I am trying to not cause problems. That just makes me feel weak and lame even though I know that it's better that I didn't clock her like I wanted to becuase I don't feel guilty like I would have if I did. I really hate being around her and I hate everyone telling me that we'll grow out of it and we'll be best friends when we're older and blahdy blah. For one thing, I don't care. For another thing, I seriously doubt we'll ever get along. And attached to that I really hate this double-standard of siblings-not-liking-each-other being okay in other situations and families but not in mine. Hey, my mom and Lori hate each other too and that seems to be justified but Cara's psycho-ness is okay and I need to be the adult and put up with her. SO STUPID IT DRIVES ME MAD. I just want to go back to SLO and continue living the nice little life I've had for the past ten months. Just me and my friends and Dan. Countdown: one week.