Way too Much Plot: A Trip into Consumerist Weddings, Old Folks, and Good O'l Rock and Role (Part 1)
The alarm woke me up at 6 a.m., I had about forty five minutes to pack, make myself look at least presentable, and get my ass out the door for the airport. I was having trouble moving fast as I was still drunk from the night before. I had only been asleep for three hours, as a night of booze, dancing, and Halloween themed burlesque had lured me away from the responsibilities laying before me. A plane, relatives, and a wedding. I guess the English businessman named Simon I had met on that debauchery filled night was correct. I am a "Crazy American Girl".
Jason was running late. Turns out his alarm didn't go off at all. Fortunately his father, who was dropping us off, woke him up in just enough time for us to get to the airport, and on the plane. Security was a nightmare. An elderly couple cut in front of me, and the Mr. of this duo hit me in the face with his backpack as he swung it onto the conveyor belt. Not intentional, but when you're stressing about things, sometimes all it takes is a smack in the face to really piss you off. There was a foreign lady behind me, possibly greek. She had a hard time understanding that because of some crazy Canadians smuggling liquid explosives onto a plane, liquids over two ounces weren't allowed. I tried to explain it to her, security ended up pulling her aside and patting her down for a good ten minutes. I felt bad for her, she looked scared. Turns out she had half a jar of peanut butter in her carry on. Security confiscated it immediately for further analysis. At least they still let her get on her flight, that is if she hadn't missed it by the time they were done. Those pat downs appear pretty thorough.
I was nervous getting on the plane, as I hadn't flown in over seven years, back when I went to say my final goodbyes to my grandmother. Jason assured me the plane wouldn't be in the air long enough for anything horrible to really happen. I was still uneasy. Hungover, we looked forward to the flight attendants and their carts full of fluids. Nothing like liquid for a hangover. As I looked at the drink menu Jason assured me that his friend, who was a flight attendant herself, knew that about 95% of male attendants are gay, and have orgies after the flight lands. Fascinating, but I was distracted by a very interesting note on the menu: Oct 31st, Happy Halloween! All drinks are free!. It was at this moment Jason introduced me to the beauty of a Bloody Mary at 9 a.m. Pure heaven, would be better with shrimp.
For being a shy, Jason was taking the whole ordeal very well. Here he was, about to meet a good majority of my compatriots, my grandparents, and possibly my aunt. But there he sat smiling, watching the clouds and mountains pass below us, not a care in the world. As much as we both wanted to drive, flying isn't exactly boring. I sat there admiring him and the view, and then it was time to land. We were only in the air about an hour.
(to be continued)
Jason was running late. Turns out his alarm didn't go off at all. Fortunately his father, who was dropping us off, woke him up in just enough time for us to get to the airport, and on the plane. Security was a nightmare. An elderly couple cut in front of me, and the Mr. of this duo hit me in the face with his backpack as he swung it onto the conveyor belt. Not intentional, but when you're stressing about things, sometimes all it takes is a smack in the face to really piss you off. There was a foreign lady behind me, possibly greek. She had a hard time understanding that because of some crazy Canadians smuggling liquid explosives onto a plane, liquids over two ounces weren't allowed. I tried to explain it to her, security ended up pulling her aside and patting her down for a good ten minutes. I felt bad for her, she looked scared. Turns out she had half a jar of peanut butter in her carry on. Security confiscated it immediately for further analysis. At least they still let her get on her flight, that is if she hadn't missed it by the time they were done. Those pat downs appear pretty thorough.
I was nervous getting on the plane, as I hadn't flown in over seven years, back when I went to say my final goodbyes to my grandmother. Jason assured me the plane wouldn't be in the air long enough for anything horrible to really happen. I was still uneasy. Hungover, we looked forward to the flight attendants and their carts full of fluids. Nothing like liquid for a hangover. As I looked at the drink menu Jason assured me that his friend, who was a flight attendant herself, knew that about 95% of male attendants are gay, and have orgies after the flight lands. Fascinating, but I was distracted by a very interesting note on the menu: Oct 31st, Happy Halloween! All drinks are free!. It was at this moment Jason introduced me to the beauty of a Bloody Mary at 9 a.m. Pure heaven, would be better with shrimp.
For being a shy, Jason was taking the whole ordeal very well. Here he was, about to meet a good majority of my compatriots, my grandparents, and possibly my aunt. But there he sat smiling, watching the clouds and mountains pass below us, not a care in the world. As much as we both wanted to drive, flying isn't exactly boring. I sat there admiring him and the view, and then it was time to land. We were only in the air about an hour.
(to be continued)