hmm ... weird

[lil_bellarina]

well ... the past couple of days have been interesting, something have been kinda depressing and some have been quite perfect! well lets see ... yesterday was the 17th so that was a lil odd, not being with alex, but don't get me wrong, i LOVE being with chris, it's just, it was kinda sad and weird! but hey oh well ... life is a never ending cycle of change! then chris accidentally called me carolyn ... which is his ex GF's name ... but it's ok, they dated for a long time and he was heartbroken after her ... so i guess it was just a slip up and i forgive him, unless it happens again! alex gave me a ride to meet my mom after dance, that was awkward, which i hate cause i don't want things to be awkward for us, he's my best friend! =/ and even though i'm with chris and love chris, part of my heart will always be with alex, i mean, he IS my first love ... i know that sounds terrible, but i'm sorry guys, but i do love chris ... but part of my heart will always be with my first love! and i can't go to homecoming cause i'm leaving for Mass. with the dance girls for a dance weekend! kinda bummed about missing it, but kinda excited for the weekend with the girls! and chris and i have had some kinda difficult convos ... ehh ... i hate being a teenager! what if life wasn't so complicated? has anyone ever wondered why it is? i mean, YIKES!!!! =( i hate this crap! but anyways ... just thought i'd update the journal ... i was bored so ... leave a sweet comment!!! =)

<3

chris - i love you hun! and nothing we've talked about is going to change that ok? i'm sorry about homecoming, we'll have to do something friday night ok? muahs* CHEEZE!!!!!! tee hee hee ... =D

alex - thanks for making me stronger ... thanks for helping me all through all of the hard times, all of my life!!! =)