why can't this be sexy in any way.
LJ Markov Random Text Generator time! It's been a while. Most of these seem to be bizarre Narnia RPF/Criminal Minds crossovers because those are the fandoms I've been writing for most recently...
Skandar's expression is a diary.
Lol that's actually kind of a cool metaphor for like, his face showing his deepest secrets or something. Nice one, generator?
The room at 2 o'clock in the early hours, disoriented. He hasn't stepped back, his head in and rides him like he's about to cry. Skandar. Skandar, why are you so afraid of?
This creeps me out and I'm not sure why.
Ben's actually stopped wearing the vest-top and knickers, her hair hanging down.
...And the generator continues to want crossdressing!Ben. Or apparently genderswapped!Ben?
ha, this is how Ben ends up right next to him, and Reid grapples awkwardly at the carpet.
SPENCER REID/BEN BARNES. I APPROVE. Idk why Reid is on the floor but I'm not complaining.
Just then, they hear a thing.
This is hilariously vague.
She will grow concerned soon, maybe start to sit on the dark in his ears.
Georgie says. "I said no." Georgie rolls her hips, and freckles like Skandar's. It's not actually that drunk, but James retreats a little bit weird, I agree.
???
Ben knocks on the bed. But when it seems like Anna's slept with Keira and he doesn't have anything for them without taking, his eyes dart to Skandar
I like this a lot.
He's surprised to discover that the TV has a beard-
Omg lol.
At first Will assumes is the slight pressure of cold metal handle of the covers and rolling over, "that's stupid." "Well, it's true," Skandar interrupts, sounding vaguely interested. He's sitting on his knees, because Georgie is getting a little put out that they said they'd never do this again
See, I wrote Will P. as 'Will' all throughout 'one of us' so that's probably what this is, but because Will usually means Moseley to me, this is weird.
She slumps down in my wildest dreams the dark and eerie corners of my hands.
"M-morning," he says, and he looks at Reid's thigh, smeared with shaving foam.
...
Skandar sneers, spliff still in his aching erection, which feels so good-better than it should, he thinks, how he should probably stop touching it.
WHAT WHAT WHAT ARE YOU DOING
All the flats have a mental institution instead of put a stop to this. Like a cat. you think about?" Skandar is reaching past him for a movie with Robert
Ben kisses her like an idiot for it, feels like an ordinary croissant
This one made me snort.
He wonders if Ben knows about the Dilaudid, reluctant at first to have him too.
Reid/Ben again?
Ben is flustered, surprised with himself, almost ashamed at his crotch, covering himself. Skandar frowns, taking the cigarette back.
Lol I imagined this as Skandar offering Ben a drag of a cigarette, and Ben getting like, a spontaneous erection, and Skandar being like "...oookay then, no cigarette for you."
Reid is growing hard fast beneath him, unable to stop the little exacto-knife in hands that quiver with pure, eager anticipation and he's invariably greeted by Will's Dad, a professor of psychiatry, but he can't stop.
INVARIABLY GREETED BY WILL'S DAD, A PROFESSOR OF PSYCHIATRY. This is amazing.
"Aww, lay off her," Keira says, looking Georgie up and down
Well well.
It's the idea of Ben -Ben who has homicidal urges. Reid shakes his head, smiling. He undoes his jeans, he feels guilty for that-putting them on his chest. It's too cold for him and easing himself down, graceful as a distant part of a sudden flood of warmth through him
Um?
And so I think we should go back," Georgie says, as Keira disentangles herself from them in a heap on the counter.
I don't know what's happening here but I approve of it.
He doesn't even wake up as she begins lining the tealights up along his spine, making him feel overwhelmingly guilty, keeping such a difference to her. The others might wonder, might touch upon it as he unbuttons his shirt, but then seems to be the three of them frozen, stiff, tense.
"Send our love to the costume tent," Ben is embracing him, holding out the door, mentally tracing the shape of Skandar's erection against his tongue. James reaches under the covers and rolling over, "that's stupid."
All the implied group sex in these things just brings me constant joy.
why can't this be sexy in any way.
Love this.
"What will that be?" Ben asks before Hotch has to draw back from Will to undress, and Will, embarrassed, bends over to James across the space next to Keira, on his arms folded across her face. "I can feel a headache too, and the cold metal pressing against Reid's shoulder. Reid slowly becomes aware of everything: the way he's almost in a voice that's shaky with threatening tears. JJ checks the file, swears under her breath and shuts the door, facing Skandar , and god, what if we want you in my blood save me
WHAT. I don't know what's going on here, but it involves Ben, Hotch, Will, James, Keira, Reid, JJ AND Skandar? That's amazing.
It waggles agitatedly with each decade.
Hee. Idek.
"We're hoping it'll wear him down," Rossi explains, clearly not wanting to see Skandar and Georgie together (besides those ones of their friendship, and then being interrupted by a wolf whistle, and they are unfastened, a triangle of white boxer shorts visible where they went though.
Lololol Rossi doesn't want to see Skandar and Georgie together except for when he's apparently watching them and wolf-whistling with his pants undone? That's what I got from this.
"Oh, god," Nathan pants against Reid's stomach. It's not terribly eloquent
Skandar is masturbating . In front of the red wool skirt hangs in loose pleats to her ankle.
NOT IN FRONT OF THE RED WOOL SKIRT!
"Yep, it's pretty cool," Skandar says then, with a bullet through his whole face
OH MY GOD
Porn porn pooorn. Okay. I'm done with the back seat.
...what was I doing back there?
And I have been an octopus. You don't know." Will tilts his head resting against Skandar's hunched shoulder, his forearm, feels the searing heat of him
I have been an octopus. You don't know.
"Actually," Ben says, and offers to drive Reid back then, but now he's sort of strangled sound, staring down at the subway station, "I want to-" he stops short again, takes a long moment.
REID/BEN REID/BEN REID/BEN
Hotch resists the urge to apologise for his neck
Skandar is taken aback; he laughs in the pub for the sun No longer will I curse the bad I've done If there's a swish of fabric from Ben's left; James is pulling on a cheese toastie.
I think maybe these are mangled song lyrics. EXTREMELY mangled song lyrics.
Ben is almost closed when he whispers "Dr. Reid?" into the shirt, for so long between them that were in a trembling hand as he says suddenly, ignoring him.
Okay, each suggestion of this crackship is making me want it more.
They talk a little lower. "Imagine Georgie getting ready for me, darling?" James asks, low, just a little, dazed.
I'm imagining him saying this to Ben, and ngl, it's pretty hot.
"she's ready for me, Ben," he murmurs, voice hoarse and scratchy from smoke
WELL.
"Agent Hotchner? Detective Barnes with the casual manner of a big deal-he wasn't trying to focus on. Trying to find any, "we did do that on purpose. And of course, and Skandar hisses a swearword at it, two other things to say that i was not surprised, but felt a little bit weird, I agree."
OKAY SO I KNOW THIS MAKES NO SENSE buuuut I just realised that I wrote a 'Detective Barnes' into my last CM fic and it was just because that was the same D.C. police guy they used in Nathan's episode buuuuuuuut I totally read this like it was Ben. Detective Ben Barnes/Dr. Spencer Reid = obvious conclusion.
Nathan opens his legs irritably
Lol I like this sentence.
"No you didn't," Ben chuckles, as the candlelight flickers across it, dim and chilly outside, and Hotch resists the urge to wipe them away, streaks red across his backside, legs casually tossed between the sofa and feels safe in looking at the wine her boyfriend bought
...what.
his expression dark and thrilled like a lover, William had promised he would do everything in his office. Rossi says when they return home.
...whaaaat.
I saw a naked body through the things scattered across Ben's dresser.
Ben isn't going to last much longer, and he smells like strawberries.
Lmao.
The trousers can't really imagine getting drawn into a porn site.
I suppose that's fair. Clothes don't usually feature heavily in porn.
it's a little about the dead octopus that washed up beside her on the carpet (and he doesn't recognise as Reid's.
If the dead octopus doesn't belong to Reid then WHOSE IS IT?
Will finds himself thinking, god, she's perfect, gazing at the airport
...to each their own, man.
Reid offers him the last time, and he realises Nathan has given his stuffed animals names
I read this like-Nathan has given Reid's stuffed animals names, and for some reason that made my heart melt with the adorable.
The furniture has been speaking to itself. But then Nathan is on fire
?!
a random picture of Ben -Ben who has a hunger for it-for knives and blood and pain-and he'll express his urges in a pair of Skandar's music, still playing, the same time, and sometimes guilty, like he's afraid of what his friend was worried because the way they look at him curiously.
The generator also seems to want serial killer!Ben. Killing people to the sound of Skandar's music?
It feels right, having Skandar by his pubic hair.
He's glad that Ben knows about the dead octopus that washed up beside him
Omg this octopus is everywhere.
OKAY THAT'S PROBABLY ENOUGH FOR NOW. I've been compiling this post while an electrician fixes our shower and I'm pretty sure he's been able to hear me attempting to stifle my laughter all this time.
Skandar's expression is a diary.
Lol that's actually kind of a cool metaphor for like, his face showing his deepest secrets or something. Nice one, generator?
The room at 2 o'clock in the early hours, disoriented. He hasn't stepped back, his head in and rides him like he's about to cry. Skandar. Skandar, why are you so afraid of?
This creeps me out and I'm not sure why.
Ben's actually stopped wearing the vest-top and knickers, her hair hanging down.
...And the generator continues to want crossdressing!Ben. Or apparently genderswapped!Ben?
ha, this is how Ben ends up right next to him, and Reid grapples awkwardly at the carpet.
SPENCER REID/BEN BARNES. I APPROVE. Idk why Reid is on the floor but I'm not complaining.
Just then, they hear a thing.
This is hilariously vague.
She will grow concerned soon, maybe start to sit on the dark in his ears.
Georgie says. "I said no." Georgie rolls her hips, and freckles like Skandar's. It's not actually that drunk, but James retreats a little bit weird, I agree.
???
Ben knocks on the bed. But when it seems like Anna's slept with Keira and he doesn't have anything for them without taking, his eyes dart to Skandar
I like this a lot.
He's surprised to discover that the TV has a beard-
Omg lol.
At first Will assumes is the slight pressure of cold metal handle of the covers and rolling over, "that's stupid." "Well, it's true," Skandar interrupts, sounding vaguely interested. He's sitting on his knees, because Georgie is getting a little put out that they said they'd never do this again
See, I wrote Will P. as 'Will' all throughout 'one of us' so that's probably what this is, but because Will usually means Moseley to me, this is weird.
She slumps down in my wildest dreams the dark and eerie corners of my hands.
"M-morning," he says, and he looks at Reid's thigh, smeared with shaving foam.
...
Skandar sneers, spliff still in his aching erection, which feels so good-better than it should, he thinks, how he should probably stop touching it.
WHAT WHAT WHAT ARE YOU DOING
All the flats have a mental institution instead of put a stop to this. Like a cat. you think about?" Skandar is reaching past him for a movie with Robert
Ben kisses her like an idiot for it, feels like an ordinary croissant
This one made me snort.
He wonders if Ben knows about the Dilaudid, reluctant at first to have him too.
Reid/Ben again?
Ben is flustered, surprised with himself, almost ashamed at his crotch, covering himself. Skandar frowns, taking the cigarette back.
Lol I imagined this as Skandar offering Ben a drag of a cigarette, and Ben getting like, a spontaneous erection, and Skandar being like "...oookay then, no cigarette for you."
Reid is growing hard fast beneath him, unable to stop the little exacto-knife in hands that quiver with pure, eager anticipation and he's invariably greeted by Will's Dad, a professor of psychiatry, but he can't stop.
INVARIABLY GREETED BY WILL'S DAD, A PROFESSOR OF PSYCHIATRY. This is amazing.
"Aww, lay off her," Keira says, looking Georgie up and down
Well well.
It's the idea of Ben -Ben who has homicidal urges. Reid shakes his head, smiling. He undoes his jeans, he feels guilty for that-putting them on his chest. It's too cold for him and easing himself down, graceful as a distant part of a sudden flood of warmth through him
Um?
And so I think we should go back," Georgie says, as Keira disentangles herself from them in a heap on the counter.
I don't know what's happening here but I approve of it.
He doesn't even wake up as she begins lining the tealights up along his spine, making him feel overwhelmingly guilty, keeping such a difference to her. The others might wonder, might touch upon it as he unbuttons his shirt, but then seems to be the three of them frozen, stiff, tense.
"Send our love to the costume tent," Ben is embracing him, holding out the door, mentally tracing the shape of Skandar's erection against his tongue. James reaches under the covers and rolling over, "that's stupid."
All the implied group sex in these things just brings me constant joy.
why can't this be sexy in any way.
Love this.
"What will that be?" Ben asks before Hotch has to draw back from Will to undress, and Will, embarrassed, bends over to James across the space next to Keira, on his arms folded across her face. "I can feel a headache too, and the cold metal pressing against Reid's shoulder. Reid slowly becomes aware of everything: the way he's almost in a voice that's shaky with threatening tears. JJ checks the file, swears under her breath and shuts the door, facing Skandar , and god, what if we want you in my blood save me
WHAT. I don't know what's going on here, but it involves Ben, Hotch, Will, James, Keira, Reid, JJ AND Skandar? That's amazing.
It waggles agitatedly with each decade.
Hee. Idek.
"We're hoping it'll wear him down," Rossi explains, clearly not wanting to see Skandar and Georgie together (besides those ones of their friendship, and then being interrupted by a wolf whistle, and they are unfastened, a triangle of white boxer shorts visible where they went though.
Lololol Rossi doesn't want to see Skandar and Georgie together except for when he's apparently watching them and wolf-whistling with his pants undone? That's what I got from this.
"Oh, god," Nathan pants against Reid's stomach. It's not terribly eloquent
Skandar is masturbating . In front of the red wool skirt hangs in loose pleats to her ankle.
NOT IN FRONT OF THE RED WOOL SKIRT!
"Yep, it's pretty cool," Skandar says then, with a bullet through his whole face
OH MY GOD
Porn porn pooorn. Okay. I'm done with the back seat.
...what was I doing back there?
And I have been an octopus. You don't know." Will tilts his head resting against Skandar's hunched shoulder, his forearm, feels the searing heat of him
I have been an octopus. You don't know.
"Actually," Ben says, and offers to drive Reid back then, but now he's sort of strangled sound, staring down at the subway station, "I want to-" he stops short again, takes a long moment.
REID/BEN REID/BEN REID/BEN
Hotch resists the urge to apologise for his neck
Skandar is taken aback; he laughs in the pub for the sun No longer will I curse the bad I've done If there's a swish of fabric from Ben's left; James is pulling on a cheese toastie.
I think maybe these are mangled song lyrics. EXTREMELY mangled song lyrics.
Ben is almost closed when he whispers "Dr. Reid?" into the shirt, for so long between them that were in a trembling hand as he says suddenly, ignoring him.
Okay, each suggestion of this crackship is making me want it more.
They talk a little lower. "Imagine Georgie getting ready for me, darling?" James asks, low, just a little, dazed.
I'm imagining him saying this to Ben, and ngl, it's pretty hot.
"she's ready for me, Ben," he murmurs, voice hoarse and scratchy from smoke
WELL.
"Agent Hotchner? Detective Barnes with the casual manner of a big deal-he wasn't trying to focus on. Trying to find any, "we did do that on purpose. And of course, and Skandar hisses a swearword at it, two other things to say that i was not surprised, but felt a little bit weird, I agree."
OKAY SO I KNOW THIS MAKES NO SENSE buuuut I just realised that I wrote a 'Detective Barnes' into my last CM fic and it was just because that was the same D.C. police guy they used in Nathan's episode buuuuuuuut I totally read this like it was Ben. Detective Ben Barnes/Dr. Spencer Reid = obvious conclusion.
Nathan opens his legs irritably
Lol I like this sentence.
"No you didn't," Ben chuckles, as the candlelight flickers across it, dim and chilly outside, and Hotch resists the urge to wipe them away, streaks red across his backside, legs casually tossed between the sofa and feels safe in looking at the wine her boyfriend bought
...what.
his expression dark and thrilled like a lover, William had promised he would do everything in his office. Rossi says when they return home.
...whaaaat.
I saw a naked body through the things scattered across Ben's dresser.
Ben isn't going to last much longer, and he smells like strawberries.
Lmao.
The trousers can't really imagine getting drawn into a porn site.
I suppose that's fair. Clothes don't usually feature heavily in porn.
it's a little about the dead octopus that washed up beside her on the carpet (and he doesn't recognise as Reid's.
If the dead octopus doesn't belong to Reid then WHOSE IS IT?
Will finds himself thinking, god, she's perfect, gazing at the airport
...to each their own, man.
Reid offers him the last time, and he realises Nathan has given his stuffed animals names
I read this like-Nathan has given Reid's stuffed animals names, and for some reason that made my heart melt with the adorable.
The furniture has been speaking to itself. But then Nathan is on fire
?!
a random picture of Ben -Ben who has a hunger for it-for knives and blood and pain-and he'll express his urges in a pair of Skandar's music, still playing, the same time, and sometimes guilty, like he's afraid of what his friend was worried because the way they look at him curiously.
The generator also seems to want serial killer!Ben. Killing people to the sound of Skandar's music?
It feels right, having Skandar by his pubic hair.
He's glad that Ben knows about the dead octopus that washed up beside him
Omg this octopus is everywhere.
OKAY THAT'S PROBABLY ENOUGH FOR NOW. I've been compiling this post while an electrician fixes our shower and I'm pretty sure he's been able to hear me attempting to stifle my laughter all this time.