Ice Castle (Chp. 2)
The sheets are soft against his skin-cold and relaxing, calming his erratic nerves like a cup of hot green tea. The moon is full tonight, the sky is clear with bright sprinkles of stars that lay outstretched across the sky like a child’s canvas ornamented with glitter. Gold and silver, dazzling.
Despite the tranquility and splendor of this place, there is something angry, devastating, throbbing deep inside his chest and Jin writhes violently in between the sheets, twisting his hand among the knots of his blanket and the soft-edged layers of the fresh linen. It smells like roses again. His mother. Another sharp pang.
Jin shuts his eyes even tighter and curls up into a ball. He keeps replaying the same scene over and over and over again in his head. Like a little video, it rewinds over and over until it’s been played so many times that Jin wants to scream with frustration and knock himself unconscious to stop the images. Those horrible images.
He sees Kazuya. Before everything had happened, he was so graceful, beautiful, almost unearthly - like a mirage of magic. And then in a flash, he was on the floor, tears running down his face and his entire composition a mess. The worst part was the screaming. The agonized screaming. Jin will never forget that moment when Kazuya backed away from him like Jin was going to eat him alive. Nothing hurt more than the way he was so frightened of him.
He is silent now, no longer squirming against the mattress, no longer getting tangled in the sheets. Jin just curls himself even tighter into a little ball and tucks his head in between his knees, trying to stop the scenario from replaying.
He has so many questions burning inside him, nearly scratching his insides, hungry for answers. He wants to ask Kazuya what happened. Why was he so scared? Why is he so sad? Why does he wear those gloves and that blindfold? What is wrong with him? Why did Yamamoto-san tell him that Kazuya was dangerous? Why?
Clutching his throbbing chest, Jin rolls over slowly on the bed, still wracking his mind for answers. He doesn’t know what to do. He just can’t get his mind off this…why?
There was something strange when Jin touched Kazuya’s palm, he is sure of that. But what exactly happened? How?
Another five minutes passes. Ten. Maybe fifteen. He doesn’t really know anymore, but by the time he checks his cell phone again, it says 2:08 AM. Jin sighs, wraps his arms around himself as he sits up on the bed, legs thrown over the side.
Jin’s room is next to his dad’s, on floor five. The really awesome part is that his room is attached with the outer wall so basically one entire wall of the room is glass. That way, he can practically see the small village lights about a mile away from the castle. It’s like sitting on a ferris wheel and staring at all the little gleaming lights that shine like diamonds, but ten times even more mesmerizing.
Floor five. Only seven floors away from Kazuya. Jin’s mind casually adds. He contemplates for a moment.
Then, before he can even change his mind, he is on his feet, the cold, hard marble floors muting his heavy steps as he creaks open the door and enters in a world flooded with moonlight beams.
---
Everything is even more unbelievably like a fairytale up here. Jin finds that his breath has been stolen yet another time when he swings open Kazuya’s door with ease and determination and takes in the sight that the room beholds.
Jin searches the room and quickly spots Kazuya, sitting upright on an elaborate, fancy couch facing one wall of the room. He is looking out the beyond the glass layer. Jin can see why now, it’s simply incredible up here-so amazing it’s almost unreal.
“You…should not be here, Jin,” Kazuya says, breaking the silence. He doesn’t even have to look to see that it’s Jin. He just knows.
Jin gulps heavily.
“I just…I needed answers. Now,” he replies.
Kazuya laughs. Almost bitterly. It’s dry, angry. A laugh that sends shivers down Jin’s back and has his blood running cold.
“And what exactly, Akanishi Jin, gives you the right to interrogate me?” Kazuya taunts, his back still turned, his yukata laying smoothly on the fancy seat, the moonlight bouncing off the shining, satin material like a glossy reflection.
“…I…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. I just want to know…why?” Jin says, quietly. He feels intimidated now, almost guilty for having demanded something so ridiculous.
Kazuya is silent for a long time, while Jin stands, hovering in the door with his hand gripping the ledge of the door so tightly his knuckles turn white.
“Well then come in, stop standing at the door,” demands the boy, moving himself over a couple inches then patting the spot next to him. He still doesn’t turn around and look at Jin.
Jin is hesitant. Suddenly, he stops himself. What am I doing here? Why do I want to know these answers so much? Why do I care so much? Who is Kazuya?
Jin shuts his eyes and pushes the doubtful voices in his head away and slowly walks over to the other side of the room, each step is gradual, tentative.
When he sits down, Jin finds that his heart is beating erratically in his chest, the rise and fall of his body uneven, ragged. Kazuya speaks and Jin is so startled, he almost jumps out of his skin.
“Are you that scared of me?” Kazuya says slowly, like a statement rather than a question.
Flushing a furious pink at being so blatantly obvious, Jin looks the opposite way and scoots as far away as possible, even though he realizes Kazuya isn’t even looking at him. Or rather, he can’t exactly. Even though he is not wearing the blindfold anymore and Jin can now see all his features clearly, his eyes are still closed, shut tightly, like he’s afraid to open them.
“N-no…I’m not afraid of you…” Jin struggles for composure, his heart threatening to fly out of his chest any second now. Calm down. Deep breath. Deep, deep breath. Breathe out… Jin thinks to himself, shutting his own eyes too and leaning carefully back against the lofty, plush seat.
At the corner of Jin’s eye, he can catch Kazuya smiling.
His smile is beautiful.
But before Jin can turn his head and get a full look at the other boy, the smile fades and he too turns his head, faces Jin. They are merely inches away now. Jin swallows, his breath hitching.
Kazuya smells like…something…something somewhat unfamiliar, but he knows it’s in there somewhere, lurking at the back of his mind. What is it? Jin catches another whiff of the compelling, intoxicating fragrance and he is tempted to crush the other boy in an embrace just to breathe in the scent freely, without restraint.
“Are you sure….? You’re really sure you’re not afraid of me…?” starts Kazuya in low voice, his tone teasing, taunting, almost teetering on the edge of dangerous and Jin finds himself backing away again.
“…what do you mean…?” Jin mumbles. He is scared. So inexplicably scared.
Kazuya’s laugh is silent, breathless and brief, but like he’s letting a million weights fall from his shoulders at the same time. He seems carefree for a fraction of a second before his expression is composed again. It’s like a song-Kazuya’s laugh. A really good song, or a really bittersweet melody that is too quick, too short-lived for someone to realize how beautiful it is.
“Well you see…” Kazuya begins, slowly, with a flush of secrecy in his voice, like he’s hiding something from the world. “I bet you came here because you wanted to know why I wore that blindfold earlier, right?”
Jin is speechless. How did he know?
“and now you’re thinking, how do I know, right?” Kazuya laughs again and Jin’s really scared now. It’s like this boy can read his mind. An unpleasant wave of goosebumps covers his skin. “It’s just…that’s what everyone wants to know. I haven’t met many people in my life. But they’ve always wanted to know about one thing.”
Jin stops breathing. Kazuya moves even closer to him, the moonlight causing his dark hair to glow and it feels like they are floating right now, with the clouds below them and the moon closer and brighter than it’s ever been. Full moon. There’s something special about tonight’s moon.
Jin watches Kazuya put the blindfold back on again.
There’s a long silence.
“…well then why do you have them?” Jin says dumbly, not really knowing what else to say. He’s out of clever remarks for now.
Kazuya smiles and Jin swears he’s practically sparkling. Well close enough to it anyways.
“If I tell you…you wouldn’t believe me anyway. But if I show you…you might have a heart attack. I can’t exactly decide which is worse…what do you think?” Kazuya smirks and Jin is almost convinced he’s joking until the playful smirk is completely wiped off his face.
Jin blinks, not really understanding.
“Wh-what…do you mean…?” he says, carefully measured breaths.
Smiling, the latter turns his head and faces the glass wall, the moonlit beams alighting his small figure now and Jin realizes that even is profile is stunning. Especially in this ethereal light.
“The moment you entered that door this afternoon, I instantly knew there was something special about you Jin. The moment I heard your voice I knew you were going to be someone I would never forget for as long as I lived,” Kazuya continues after a brief pause. “For some reason, you’re different. I don’t why but you are. And to be honest, it’s a little more than nerve-wracking,” Kazuya laughs, nervous and disheveled, an impression he has never had on Jin until this moment. “I don’t know what makes you stand out from the rest of the people I have ever met, but it frightens me because I have never told anyone about myself before. Nobody knows my secrets except for my family…”
Jin is afraid to look at Kazuya now, afraid of what kind of deep scars lay inside that frail, thin boy.
Kazuya goes on, voice small and quiet in the vast expanse of the room, in the endless space they have. He takes a deep breath and still refuses to turn to face Jin, hands fumbling with each other nervously in his lap, yukata settling gently over his delicate frame.
“During the day, usually my eyes are normal. Just like yours-hazel, light brown, I guess you could say…” Kazuya says then stops abruptly. Jin can tell this is really hard for him.
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Jin offers, smiling bleakly. He wants to touch Kazuya’s shoulder but is afraid of another screaming scenario like this afternoon-not exactly an experience he wants to relive.
“…I wish I didn’t feel this way. It’s like I feel compelled to tell you. I want to tell you. And that’s what scares me-I’ve never … ever…opened up to a stranger like this before…who are you, Jin?” Kazuya is whispering now, his voice fading and dying in his throat.
Jin scrunches up his eyebrows, eyes drifting over to Kazuya, he scrutinizes the boy’s features, not really knowing what to expect.
“I don’t know, Kazuya,” Jin replies simply. “I wish I knew.”
Kazuya nods slowly, letting the information absorb, then he continues, brushing Jin’s answer aside, “Like I said earlier, during the day, my eyes are perfectly normal…just like yours, just like anyone else. But at night…they are completely … different. That is why I wear the blindfold, because if any stranger sees my eyes at night, they will probably lock me up for life, or put me in some science lab for testing. Or maybe a zoo. I’m not your average teen with pretty, colorful contacts, either…”
The curiosity is killing him now, the suspense clawing inside his stomach. Jin breathes out deeply. He doesn’t say anything, just looks out into the silver clouds floating weightlessly below them and listens. Just listens.
“But there are exceptions…on nights when the moon is full…even during the day, it will look the same as nighttime. That’s why you saw me with this on earlier,” Kazuya points to the blind fold.
Struggling to understand, to absorb the information, which all sounds like a bunch of crazy talk right now, Jin mutters, “And what exactly…does it look like at night, then?”
Kazuya smiles then. A mysterious smile, secretive. Almost eerie.
“You … have to promise…you can’t scream or run or faint…okay?” Kazuya says, the smile already vanishing.
Jin’s heart is racing, now. He doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know if he really wants this anymore. He nods.
Kazuya can’t even see him, but he knows. He can sense it, Jin guesses.
“You’re scared, aren’t you?”
“…Yeah, I guess.”
“It’s okay, don’t be afraid of me…I would never harm you. Do you trust me?”
“I trust you.”
“That’s all I needed to hear.”
Rising to his feet, Kazuya makes his way to the wall, the glass barrier. The light continues to reflect off the silk yukata like a mirror, the glowing causing the outline of his body to smolder in the pale, milky radiance.
Ever so slowly, he breathes in, then exhales calmingly, like he’s releasing all the tension in his body with that one breath. Then even slower, he reaches to his face, fingers brushing the thick fabric of the black blindfold.
Tracing the shape of the cloth until he reaches the back of the blindfold, his fingers intertwine gracefully with the string tying the material together. Gradually, he undoes the knot, the string slipping, falling apart and the blindfold tumbling into his hands gently. Kazuya is still facing the wall.
Jin grimaces, he can see the pain now, all the agony this boy holds in his heart. All his emotions are put into the light as he’s making himself so vulnerable to Jin, so defenseless.
Jin refuses to blink. He won’t miss this. Not now.
Kazuya opens his eyes then, and turns around, looking Jin right in the eye.
Jin gasps, not really sure what to do next but stare. It’s not…not what he expected. At all.
Kazuya’s eyes are the glowing, like glowing coals. They are the color of flames, bright and flashing, like rubies radiating and flickering in a dark cave. His eyes are orange, crimson, and golden all at once-they are shining in the dark, like the image of a fireplace, but in someone’s eyes.
The color of a final summer sunset.
A cat’s eyes, only ten times brighter, ten times more beautiful.
---
Kazuya flushes angrily and blinks, still staring back at Jin, his eyes misting over now, his teeth biting heavily down on his lower lip.
“Do I look like a monster to you?” he breathes, breathless, out of air. Afraid of what the answer might be.
Laughing, Jin’s heart aches but at the same time he feels amused.
“Monster? What are you talking about? Are you out of your mind? It’s like God sent me an angel, a miracle. Your eyes, are the most exquisite, gorgeous things I have ever seen,” Jin says effortlessly, completely confident in his words. Sure. He rises to his feet, takes three steps forward until he’s a couple inches away from the other boy and looks at him.
Kazuya doesn’t say anything, just stares at him, tears streaking down his face now. The tears only add to the breathtaking, otherworldly effect of his eyes, Jin decides.
Then, he does something neither of them expected. Jin reaches out and hesitates for one instant before he closes the space between them and crushes the thin boy against his frame, their bodies colliding awkwardly, violently. But for some reason, it feels like they fit perfectly. Against one another like this, it feels right. He can feel the slowing heartbeat of Kazuya’s heart a step behind his own, thumping, racing pulse. Jin knows it now-the smell is jasmine. Jasmine flowers. He can feel the coldness of Kazuya’s body pressing against his own. No body heat, or barely, Jin realizes.
“Why are you so cold?” Jin gasps, whispering harshly in the dark while he feels the tears falling from Kazuya’s eyes, those eyes. The wetness is slowly seeping onto his shirt.
“You’re so…warm…are you burning up?” is Kazuya’s reply. He sounds worried.
“That’s just me! I’m never cold. Always really, really hot. I’m pretty sure there’s nothing wrong with me,” Jin says brightly, cheerfully, trying to help wash away all the pain this boy is going through.
I don’t know what’s making him hurt so much, not yet, but I know…one day I will make this pain go away.
Jin smiles softly when he feels Kazuya finally placing his hands on Jin’s back and returning the embrace, pressing their bodies even closer until he can feels his ribs hurting and his heart breaking and the tears wetting Jin’s shirt. But he doesn’t care anymore.
“I’ve never been so warm…” Kazuya says. And he means it. Heart, body, and soul-he is wrapped in a cloud of heat, melting the coldness of his heart.
“Then smile for me, please. I bet those eyes look even more gorgeous when you’re smiling than when you’re crying.”
---
When it’s morning, Jin is in his bed again, hair tousled and his mind a mess, a complicated whirlwind of emotions mixing in with his every thought. Jin’s dad bursts into his room with a frenzied, excited demeanor-way too eager for Jin at this hour.
“We’re going to the little village today for a quick look around since they’re setting up a festival for New Year’s. So get ready, we might end up staying all day,” he says, bursting with energy.
“Too early, dad. Tell me later when I can comprehend what you’re saying…” Jin groans and pulls the blanket over his head. Technically, he didn’t get any sleep since he stayed there in the top floor with Kazuya until sunrise.
But it was worth it.
---
Little bright festive lanterns everywhere. Everything is decorated with pretty Japanese calligraphy and the smells of the food is amazing. Jin can’t recall when was the last time he’s been to a place like this -festivals, carnivals, crowds. It’s been a while. The whole place is amazingly crowded, music playing everyone and people being drunk and happy and carefree-different from the usual, routine, quiet lives people in this part of the countryside lead. There are strange foods from foreign lands Jin has never seen before and he is surprisingly delighted to try new things. People dance everywhere they want and just seem to live in a completely different world from the life he has known. Even though the weather is freezing, there is so much activity and so many people that it’s pretty much warm where everyone is crowded together.
There are food stands and game stands and just whatever-you-can-think-of stands of random things that people will want to buy. There’s a mini grocery stand with fruits and flowers. Jin is tempted to buy the jasmine flowers he spots in the aisles.
So crowded. So loud. So festive.
It’s like Christmas season all over again.
Jin hums to himself as he strolls down the streets, each and every one filled with bustling people and children laughing and playing tag. There’s music from every stand, almost and everyone just drifts by, mesmerized by the happiness and the celebrations.
“Jin, why don’t you explore by yourself for a while? I’ll call you when we should leave, okay?” says Jin’s dad, already turning to head into the bar.
“Sure,” Jin laughs and continues on his way, trying to not be overwhelmed with all the loud noises and commotion.
He stumbles on a small, petite green tent at the corner of one street. When he peaks inside, he’s surprised to see there’s an elderly lady in one corner and all around her are little kids. Most younger than him, but two or three looking about his age.
“Ah, would you like you join us?” croaks the old lady cheerfully, glancing up at him.
Jin doesn’t hesitate, “What’s going on in here?” He’s already getting in the tent and settling down before the question is even finished being asked.
“Oh, we’re just telling a couple ol’ myth stories, you’re free to listen if you’d want,” she says brightly, smiling at him. There’s a heater in the corner of the tent and a small lantern in the middle-being the only light source. It casts a comforting glow in the tent, casting tall shadows over the people.
“Sounds great,” Jin chirps and looks around the tent at his fellow listeners who are peering curiously at him as well.
“Alright then, let’s begin.” The old lady clears her throat, shifting her position to get comfortable and everyone leans in closer, eager to hear.
“A long time ago-30,000 years ago, a goddess and a god were born from the god of creation and life: Izanagi. The goddess being Amaterasu herself-the goddess of the sun and everything having to do with the sun. On the other hand, her brother was the opposite-the god of the moon, Tsukuyomi. Governing the powers of the moon and moonlit nights. It is said that one time, Tsukuyomi angered Amaterasu by killing the goddess of food, Uke Mochi.
Amaterasu flew into a rage and vowed that she would never talk to her brother again, refusing to look at him ever again. In her anger and fury, she moved to a different part of the sky, thus, never seeing her brother again. This created the night and day and why the moon and sun are never in the sky at the same time.
According to legend, Amaterasu cursed all the descendents of Tsukuyomi with a terrible curse-they could never be like normal humans. They could not live normal, human lives. They were cursed to the power of the moon. Whenever the moon shone, their true, monstrous forms would show.
Tsukuyomi, feeling just as much rage as Amaterasu did since she cursed him, placed an inevitable, horrible fate for two children from each of them would bring upon unimaginable horror. Since he did not have as much power over the Earth and the sky, he could not place a curse on her descendents like she did on his. But instead, he was foolish enough to create a doomsday.
Every three thousand years, a certain descendent of Tsukuyomi is born, and so is a child directly related to Amaterasu herself. Only every three thousand years, an accursed descendent of Tsukuyomi’s is born-all the others before or after that child is normal, never realizing their true powers. During that three thousandth year, the two are never to meet, if these two souls’ paths ever cross, especially on a night with a full moon-“
“Jin, something urgent came up, we gotta go,” interrupts a familiar voice.
Jin looks up to find his dad at the entrance of the tent. “Let’s go. Sorry for interrupting, m’am.”
The little old lady shakes her head and just smiles.
“Sorry,” Jin mutters before he steps out of the tent.
“Yamamoto-san just called me. It seems that…Kazuya is nowhere to be found…he needs our help,” his dad says solemnly-he sounds really worried.
Jin nods, his heart already racing and his mind thinking up the worse case scenarios. Somewhere in the back of his mind, the story of Amaterasu and Tsukuyomi needs to be finished. He didn’t even get to hear what would happen when the two descendents were to meet…
But that’s not important right now. Kazuya’s safety is what he needs to worry about.
For some reason, Jin realizes that there’s something in his heart, giving him a gut feeling that Kazuya is okay, even though Jin really doesn’t know if he is or not.
There’s just something about Kazuya’s behavior last night that seems like it would spawn something like this.
Please be okay. Please don’t do anything stupid.
Jin’s drive back to the castle is filled with worried thoughts of Kazuya and Amaterasu and Tsukuyomi.
He feels inexplicably sad. Why?
There is one final lingering sentence he keeps imagining in his mind: The moon was full last night. The day I met Kazuya…
-----------------end chp. 2-------------------
A/N: I FELT LIKE I DID REALLY REALLY BAD JOB DESCRIBING KAZUYA'S EYES BECAUSE THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO SOUND WAYYY
more beautiful than how i described it T___T BUT I TOTALLY FAILED WAAHHH ;_____________; it was SO SO breathtaking and amazing in my HEAD but when i started writing it, it came out all wrong omg DD: WAAHHH ToT so sad D: i hope you guys aren't too angry at me for being such fail at the most critical parts ;___; oh and for disclaimer purposes: the myth of amaterasu and tsukuyomi are all from real legends (i did some research) up until the part about the curse (: from that point on, i created the rest (: so i hope that doesnt make you confused with what's REALLY the true Japanese legends and which were made up XDD anyways, i hope this wasnt too terrible for you guys >< tell me what you think, okay? comments really would just make my day~<3
Despite the tranquility and splendor of this place, there is something angry, devastating, throbbing deep inside his chest and Jin writhes violently in between the sheets, twisting his hand among the knots of his blanket and the soft-edged layers of the fresh linen. It smells like roses again. His mother. Another sharp pang.
Jin shuts his eyes even tighter and curls up into a ball. He keeps replaying the same scene over and over and over again in his head. Like a little video, it rewinds over and over until it’s been played so many times that Jin wants to scream with frustration and knock himself unconscious to stop the images. Those horrible images.
He sees Kazuya. Before everything had happened, he was so graceful, beautiful, almost unearthly - like a mirage of magic. And then in a flash, he was on the floor, tears running down his face and his entire composition a mess. The worst part was the screaming. The agonized screaming. Jin will never forget that moment when Kazuya backed away from him like Jin was going to eat him alive. Nothing hurt more than the way he was so frightened of him.
He is silent now, no longer squirming against the mattress, no longer getting tangled in the sheets. Jin just curls himself even tighter into a little ball and tucks his head in between his knees, trying to stop the scenario from replaying.
He has so many questions burning inside him, nearly scratching his insides, hungry for answers. He wants to ask Kazuya what happened. Why was he so scared? Why is he so sad? Why does he wear those gloves and that blindfold? What is wrong with him? Why did Yamamoto-san tell him that Kazuya was dangerous? Why?
Clutching his throbbing chest, Jin rolls over slowly on the bed, still wracking his mind for answers. He doesn’t know what to do. He just can’t get his mind off this…why?
There was something strange when Jin touched Kazuya’s palm, he is sure of that. But what exactly happened? How?
Another five minutes passes. Ten. Maybe fifteen. He doesn’t really know anymore, but by the time he checks his cell phone again, it says 2:08 AM. Jin sighs, wraps his arms around himself as he sits up on the bed, legs thrown over the side.
Jin’s room is next to his dad’s, on floor five. The really awesome part is that his room is attached with the outer wall so basically one entire wall of the room is glass. That way, he can practically see the small village lights about a mile away from the castle. It’s like sitting on a ferris wheel and staring at all the little gleaming lights that shine like diamonds, but ten times even more mesmerizing.
Floor five. Only seven floors away from Kazuya. Jin’s mind casually adds. He contemplates for a moment.
Then, before he can even change his mind, he is on his feet, the cold, hard marble floors muting his heavy steps as he creaks open the door and enters in a world flooded with moonlight beams.
---
Everything is even more unbelievably like a fairytale up here. Jin finds that his breath has been stolen yet another time when he swings open Kazuya’s door with ease and determination and takes in the sight that the room beholds.
Jin searches the room and quickly spots Kazuya, sitting upright on an elaborate, fancy couch facing one wall of the room. He is looking out the beyond the glass layer. Jin can see why now, it’s simply incredible up here-so amazing it’s almost unreal.
“You…should not be here, Jin,” Kazuya says, breaking the silence. He doesn’t even have to look to see that it’s Jin. He just knows.
Jin gulps heavily.
“I just…I needed answers. Now,” he replies.
Kazuya laughs. Almost bitterly. It’s dry, angry. A laugh that sends shivers down Jin’s back and has his blood running cold.
“And what exactly, Akanishi Jin, gives you the right to interrogate me?” Kazuya taunts, his back still turned, his yukata laying smoothly on the fancy seat, the moonlight bouncing off the shining, satin material like a glossy reflection.
“…I…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. I just want to know…why?” Jin says, quietly. He feels intimidated now, almost guilty for having demanded something so ridiculous.
Kazuya is silent for a long time, while Jin stands, hovering in the door with his hand gripping the ledge of the door so tightly his knuckles turn white.
“Well then come in, stop standing at the door,” demands the boy, moving himself over a couple inches then patting the spot next to him. He still doesn’t turn around and look at Jin.
Jin is hesitant. Suddenly, he stops himself. What am I doing here? Why do I want to know these answers so much? Why do I care so much? Who is Kazuya?
Jin shuts his eyes and pushes the doubtful voices in his head away and slowly walks over to the other side of the room, each step is gradual, tentative.
When he sits down, Jin finds that his heart is beating erratically in his chest, the rise and fall of his body uneven, ragged. Kazuya speaks and Jin is so startled, he almost jumps out of his skin.
“Are you that scared of me?” Kazuya says slowly, like a statement rather than a question.
Flushing a furious pink at being so blatantly obvious, Jin looks the opposite way and scoots as far away as possible, even though he realizes Kazuya isn’t even looking at him. Or rather, he can’t exactly. Even though he is not wearing the blindfold anymore and Jin can now see all his features clearly, his eyes are still closed, shut tightly, like he’s afraid to open them.
“N-no…I’m not afraid of you…” Jin struggles for composure, his heart threatening to fly out of his chest any second now. Calm down. Deep breath. Deep, deep breath. Breathe out… Jin thinks to himself, shutting his own eyes too and leaning carefully back against the lofty, plush seat.
At the corner of Jin’s eye, he can catch Kazuya smiling.
His smile is beautiful.
But before Jin can turn his head and get a full look at the other boy, the smile fades and he too turns his head, faces Jin. They are merely inches away now. Jin swallows, his breath hitching.
Kazuya smells like…something…something somewhat unfamiliar, but he knows it’s in there somewhere, lurking at the back of his mind. What is it? Jin catches another whiff of the compelling, intoxicating fragrance and he is tempted to crush the other boy in an embrace just to breathe in the scent freely, without restraint.
“Are you sure….? You’re really sure you’re not afraid of me…?” starts Kazuya in low voice, his tone teasing, taunting, almost teetering on the edge of dangerous and Jin finds himself backing away again.
“…what do you mean…?” Jin mumbles. He is scared. So inexplicably scared.
Kazuya’s laugh is silent, breathless and brief, but like he’s letting a million weights fall from his shoulders at the same time. He seems carefree for a fraction of a second before his expression is composed again. It’s like a song-Kazuya’s laugh. A really good song, or a really bittersweet melody that is too quick, too short-lived for someone to realize how beautiful it is.
“Well you see…” Kazuya begins, slowly, with a flush of secrecy in his voice, like he’s hiding something from the world. “I bet you came here because you wanted to know why I wore that blindfold earlier, right?”
Jin is speechless. How did he know?
“and now you’re thinking, how do I know, right?” Kazuya laughs again and Jin’s really scared now. It’s like this boy can read his mind. An unpleasant wave of goosebumps covers his skin. “It’s just…that’s what everyone wants to know. I haven’t met many people in my life. But they’ve always wanted to know about one thing.”
Jin stops breathing. Kazuya moves even closer to him, the moonlight causing his dark hair to glow and it feels like they are floating right now, with the clouds below them and the moon closer and brighter than it’s ever been. Full moon. There’s something special about tonight’s moon.
Jin watches Kazuya put the blindfold back on again.
There’s a long silence.
“…well then why do you have them?” Jin says dumbly, not really knowing what else to say. He’s out of clever remarks for now.
Kazuya smiles and Jin swears he’s practically sparkling. Well close enough to it anyways.
“If I tell you…you wouldn’t believe me anyway. But if I show you…you might have a heart attack. I can’t exactly decide which is worse…what do you think?” Kazuya smirks and Jin is almost convinced he’s joking until the playful smirk is completely wiped off his face.
Jin blinks, not really understanding.
“Wh-what…do you mean…?” he says, carefully measured breaths.
Smiling, the latter turns his head and faces the glass wall, the moonlit beams alighting his small figure now and Jin realizes that even is profile is stunning. Especially in this ethereal light.
“The moment you entered that door this afternoon, I instantly knew there was something special about you Jin. The moment I heard your voice I knew you were going to be someone I would never forget for as long as I lived,” Kazuya continues after a brief pause. “For some reason, you’re different. I don’t why but you are. And to be honest, it’s a little more than nerve-wracking,” Kazuya laughs, nervous and disheveled, an impression he has never had on Jin until this moment. “I don’t know what makes you stand out from the rest of the people I have ever met, but it frightens me because I have never told anyone about myself before. Nobody knows my secrets except for my family…”
Jin is afraid to look at Kazuya now, afraid of what kind of deep scars lay inside that frail, thin boy.
Kazuya goes on, voice small and quiet in the vast expanse of the room, in the endless space they have. He takes a deep breath and still refuses to turn to face Jin, hands fumbling with each other nervously in his lap, yukata settling gently over his delicate frame.
“During the day, usually my eyes are normal. Just like yours-hazel, light brown, I guess you could say…” Kazuya says then stops abruptly. Jin can tell this is really hard for him.
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Jin offers, smiling bleakly. He wants to touch Kazuya’s shoulder but is afraid of another screaming scenario like this afternoon-not exactly an experience he wants to relive.
“…I wish I didn’t feel this way. It’s like I feel compelled to tell you. I want to tell you. And that’s what scares me-I’ve never … ever…opened up to a stranger like this before…who are you, Jin?” Kazuya is whispering now, his voice fading and dying in his throat.
Jin scrunches up his eyebrows, eyes drifting over to Kazuya, he scrutinizes the boy’s features, not really knowing what to expect.
“I don’t know, Kazuya,” Jin replies simply. “I wish I knew.”
Kazuya nods slowly, letting the information absorb, then he continues, brushing Jin’s answer aside, “Like I said earlier, during the day, my eyes are perfectly normal…just like yours, just like anyone else. But at night…they are completely … different. That is why I wear the blindfold, because if any stranger sees my eyes at night, they will probably lock me up for life, or put me in some science lab for testing. Or maybe a zoo. I’m not your average teen with pretty, colorful contacts, either…”
The curiosity is killing him now, the suspense clawing inside his stomach. Jin breathes out deeply. He doesn’t say anything, just looks out into the silver clouds floating weightlessly below them and listens. Just listens.
“But there are exceptions…on nights when the moon is full…even during the day, it will look the same as nighttime. That’s why you saw me with this on earlier,” Kazuya points to the blind fold.
Struggling to understand, to absorb the information, which all sounds like a bunch of crazy talk right now, Jin mutters, “And what exactly…does it look like at night, then?”
Kazuya smiles then. A mysterious smile, secretive. Almost eerie.
“You … have to promise…you can’t scream or run or faint…okay?” Kazuya says, the smile already vanishing.
Jin’s heart is racing, now. He doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know if he really wants this anymore. He nods.
Kazuya can’t even see him, but he knows. He can sense it, Jin guesses.
“You’re scared, aren’t you?”
“…Yeah, I guess.”
“It’s okay, don’t be afraid of me…I would never harm you. Do you trust me?”
“I trust you.”
“That’s all I needed to hear.”
Rising to his feet, Kazuya makes his way to the wall, the glass barrier. The light continues to reflect off the silk yukata like a mirror, the glowing causing the outline of his body to smolder in the pale, milky radiance.
Ever so slowly, he breathes in, then exhales calmingly, like he’s releasing all the tension in his body with that one breath. Then even slower, he reaches to his face, fingers brushing the thick fabric of the black blindfold.
Tracing the shape of the cloth until he reaches the back of the blindfold, his fingers intertwine gracefully with the string tying the material together. Gradually, he undoes the knot, the string slipping, falling apart and the blindfold tumbling into his hands gently. Kazuya is still facing the wall.
Jin grimaces, he can see the pain now, all the agony this boy holds in his heart. All his emotions are put into the light as he’s making himself so vulnerable to Jin, so defenseless.
Jin refuses to blink. He won’t miss this. Not now.
Kazuya opens his eyes then, and turns around, looking Jin right in the eye.
Jin gasps, not really sure what to do next but stare. It’s not…not what he expected. At all.
Kazuya’s eyes are the glowing, like glowing coals. They are the color of flames, bright and flashing, like rubies radiating and flickering in a dark cave. His eyes are orange, crimson, and golden all at once-they are shining in the dark, like the image of a fireplace, but in someone’s eyes.
The color of a final summer sunset.
A cat’s eyes, only ten times brighter, ten times more beautiful.
---
Kazuya flushes angrily and blinks, still staring back at Jin, his eyes misting over now, his teeth biting heavily down on his lower lip.
“Do I look like a monster to you?” he breathes, breathless, out of air. Afraid of what the answer might be.
Laughing, Jin’s heart aches but at the same time he feels amused.
“Monster? What are you talking about? Are you out of your mind? It’s like God sent me an angel, a miracle. Your eyes, are the most exquisite, gorgeous things I have ever seen,” Jin says effortlessly, completely confident in his words. Sure. He rises to his feet, takes three steps forward until he’s a couple inches away from the other boy and looks at him.
Kazuya doesn’t say anything, just stares at him, tears streaking down his face now. The tears only add to the breathtaking, otherworldly effect of his eyes, Jin decides.
Then, he does something neither of them expected. Jin reaches out and hesitates for one instant before he closes the space between them and crushes the thin boy against his frame, their bodies colliding awkwardly, violently. But for some reason, it feels like they fit perfectly. Against one another like this, it feels right. He can feel the slowing heartbeat of Kazuya’s heart a step behind his own, thumping, racing pulse. Jin knows it now-the smell is jasmine. Jasmine flowers. He can feel the coldness of Kazuya’s body pressing against his own. No body heat, or barely, Jin realizes.
“Why are you so cold?” Jin gasps, whispering harshly in the dark while he feels the tears falling from Kazuya’s eyes, those eyes. The wetness is slowly seeping onto his shirt.
“You’re so…warm…are you burning up?” is Kazuya’s reply. He sounds worried.
“That’s just me! I’m never cold. Always really, really hot. I’m pretty sure there’s nothing wrong with me,” Jin says brightly, cheerfully, trying to help wash away all the pain this boy is going through.
I don’t know what’s making him hurt so much, not yet, but I know…one day I will make this pain go away.
Jin smiles softly when he feels Kazuya finally placing his hands on Jin’s back and returning the embrace, pressing their bodies even closer until he can feels his ribs hurting and his heart breaking and the tears wetting Jin’s shirt. But he doesn’t care anymore.
“I’ve never been so warm…” Kazuya says. And he means it. Heart, body, and soul-he is wrapped in a cloud of heat, melting the coldness of his heart.
“Then smile for me, please. I bet those eyes look even more gorgeous when you’re smiling than when you’re crying.”
---
When it’s morning, Jin is in his bed again, hair tousled and his mind a mess, a complicated whirlwind of emotions mixing in with his every thought. Jin’s dad bursts into his room with a frenzied, excited demeanor-way too eager for Jin at this hour.
“We’re going to the little village today for a quick look around since they’re setting up a festival for New Year’s. So get ready, we might end up staying all day,” he says, bursting with energy.
“Too early, dad. Tell me later when I can comprehend what you’re saying…” Jin groans and pulls the blanket over his head. Technically, he didn’t get any sleep since he stayed there in the top floor with Kazuya until sunrise.
But it was worth it.
---
Little bright festive lanterns everywhere. Everything is decorated with pretty Japanese calligraphy and the smells of the food is amazing. Jin can’t recall when was the last time he’s been to a place like this -festivals, carnivals, crowds. It’s been a while. The whole place is amazingly crowded, music playing everyone and people being drunk and happy and carefree-different from the usual, routine, quiet lives people in this part of the countryside lead. There are strange foods from foreign lands Jin has never seen before and he is surprisingly delighted to try new things. People dance everywhere they want and just seem to live in a completely different world from the life he has known. Even though the weather is freezing, there is so much activity and so many people that it’s pretty much warm where everyone is crowded together.
There are food stands and game stands and just whatever-you-can-think-of stands of random things that people will want to buy. There’s a mini grocery stand with fruits and flowers. Jin is tempted to buy the jasmine flowers he spots in the aisles.
So crowded. So loud. So festive.
It’s like Christmas season all over again.
Jin hums to himself as he strolls down the streets, each and every one filled with bustling people and children laughing and playing tag. There’s music from every stand, almost and everyone just drifts by, mesmerized by the happiness and the celebrations.
“Jin, why don’t you explore by yourself for a while? I’ll call you when we should leave, okay?” says Jin’s dad, already turning to head into the bar.
“Sure,” Jin laughs and continues on his way, trying to not be overwhelmed with all the loud noises and commotion.
He stumbles on a small, petite green tent at the corner of one street. When he peaks inside, he’s surprised to see there’s an elderly lady in one corner and all around her are little kids. Most younger than him, but two or three looking about his age.
“Ah, would you like you join us?” croaks the old lady cheerfully, glancing up at him.
Jin doesn’t hesitate, “What’s going on in here?” He’s already getting in the tent and settling down before the question is even finished being asked.
“Oh, we’re just telling a couple ol’ myth stories, you’re free to listen if you’d want,” she says brightly, smiling at him. There’s a heater in the corner of the tent and a small lantern in the middle-being the only light source. It casts a comforting glow in the tent, casting tall shadows over the people.
“Sounds great,” Jin chirps and looks around the tent at his fellow listeners who are peering curiously at him as well.
“Alright then, let’s begin.” The old lady clears her throat, shifting her position to get comfortable and everyone leans in closer, eager to hear.
“A long time ago-30,000 years ago, a goddess and a god were born from the god of creation and life: Izanagi. The goddess being Amaterasu herself-the goddess of the sun and everything having to do with the sun. On the other hand, her brother was the opposite-the god of the moon, Tsukuyomi. Governing the powers of the moon and moonlit nights. It is said that one time, Tsukuyomi angered Amaterasu by killing the goddess of food, Uke Mochi.
Amaterasu flew into a rage and vowed that she would never talk to her brother again, refusing to look at him ever again. In her anger and fury, she moved to a different part of the sky, thus, never seeing her brother again. This created the night and day and why the moon and sun are never in the sky at the same time.
According to legend, Amaterasu cursed all the descendents of Tsukuyomi with a terrible curse-they could never be like normal humans. They could not live normal, human lives. They were cursed to the power of the moon. Whenever the moon shone, their true, monstrous forms would show.
Tsukuyomi, feeling just as much rage as Amaterasu did since she cursed him, placed an inevitable, horrible fate for two children from each of them would bring upon unimaginable horror. Since he did not have as much power over the Earth and the sky, he could not place a curse on her descendents like she did on his. But instead, he was foolish enough to create a doomsday.
Every three thousand years, a certain descendent of Tsukuyomi is born, and so is a child directly related to Amaterasu herself. Only every three thousand years, an accursed descendent of Tsukuyomi’s is born-all the others before or after that child is normal, never realizing their true powers. During that three thousandth year, the two are never to meet, if these two souls’ paths ever cross, especially on a night with a full moon-“
“Jin, something urgent came up, we gotta go,” interrupts a familiar voice.
Jin looks up to find his dad at the entrance of the tent. “Let’s go. Sorry for interrupting, m’am.”
The little old lady shakes her head and just smiles.
“Sorry,” Jin mutters before he steps out of the tent.
“Yamamoto-san just called me. It seems that…Kazuya is nowhere to be found…he needs our help,” his dad says solemnly-he sounds really worried.
Jin nods, his heart already racing and his mind thinking up the worse case scenarios. Somewhere in the back of his mind, the story of Amaterasu and Tsukuyomi needs to be finished. He didn’t even get to hear what would happen when the two descendents were to meet…
But that’s not important right now. Kazuya’s safety is what he needs to worry about.
For some reason, Jin realizes that there’s something in his heart, giving him a gut feeling that Kazuya is okay, even though Jin really doesn’t know if he is or not.
There’s just something about Kazuya’s behavior last night that seems like it would spawn something like this.
Please be okay. Please don’t do anything stupid.
Jin’s drive back to the castle is filled with worried thoughts of Kazuya and Amaterasu and Tsukuyomi.
He feels inexplicably sad. Why?
There is one final lingering sentence he keeps imagining in his mind: The moon was full last night. The day I met Kazuya…
-----------------end chp. 2-------------------
A/N: I FELT LIKE I DID REALLY REALLY BAD JOB DESCRIBING KAZUYA'S EYES BECAUSE THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO SOUND WAYYY
more beautiful than how i described it T___T BUT I TOTALLY FAILED WAAHHH ;_____________; it was SO SO breathtaking and amazing in my HEAD but when i started writing it, it came out all wrong omg DD: WAAHHH ToT so sad D: i hope you guys aren't too angry at me for being such fail at the most critical parts ;___; oh and for disclaimer purposes: the myth of amaterasu and tsukuyomi are all from real legends (i did some research) up until the part about the curse (: from that point on, i created the rest (: so i hope that doesnt make you confused with what's REALLY the true Japanese legends and which were made up XDD anyways, i hope this wasnt too terrible for you guys >< tell me what you think, okay? comments really would just make my day~<3