Fic for Hermette!
SO OKAY. I promised fingering fic for hermette, and it took approximately 234o23i4 x longer than it should've but it's finally DONE, so \o/ I HOPE YOU LIKE IT, BB!
ETA: header info'd be nice, wouldn't it? yeah.
Title: mets ton doigt (dans mon cul)
Author: likeaglass
Pairing: Bradley/Colin
Rating: NC17. YOU'RE SURPRISED.
Summary: Bradley's obsessed with Colin's fingers.
Notes: for hermette! :D Also, thanks to Frankie and Sarah for looking this over for me, love y'all!
The first thing Bradley noticed about Colin, even before he noticed his eyes or his ears or his smile, was his hands.
“And this is your costar, Colin Morgan,” Johnny Capp said, beaming as he introduced Colin as though he were a prized lamb at a fair.
Colin held out a hand, and Bradley shook it, a little surprised at the strength he could feel in his new costar’s grip, though Colin was a little slip of a thing, all gangly limbs and elbows.
“All right?” Colin asked. It sounded strange and lilting and almost indecipherable, and it took Bradley a good few seconds too long to stammer out an acceptable response. Colin’s eyes crinkled, and Bradley had enough time to think, “...oh fuck,” before Johnny started going on about schedules and rehearsals and god knew what else.
And the thing was, even though Bradley quickly noticed all the other endearing qualities about Colin -- his laugh, his shy blushes, the bright blue of his eyes -- it was still his hands that Bradley thought about most, that made Bradley swallow hard against the thought of what, exactly, those hands could do if they wanted.
Bradley was careful to never let on, of course. He didn’t want Colin feeling uncomfortable around him, or worse, avoiding him. In fact, it became very important very quickly that Colin liked Bradley, that he smiled at him and laughed at his jokes and was near him as often as possible. Bradley had never felt like this before, like his happiness depended upon another person, but Colin’s nearness quickly became the most important thing in Bradley’s life.
And it was fine for a while. Great even. Bradley saw Colin every day, on set and off, working and playing together. Colin became his best friend, the person he went to when he was upset or sad or happy, and it was...it was wonderful. Bradley had never met anyone like Colin, never knew there was anyone as fundamentally good as Colin, as sweet and caring and amazing.
But Bradley still thought about his hands. Thought about the strength in those long, slender fingers. About what they would feel like on Bradley’s body. Would they be soft and tender, hesitant? Or strong and sure, commanding as they worked Bradley into a helpless frenzy of want? Bradley thought about Colin’s fingers on him, thought about them on his face, cupping his chin; on his chest, tracing a tight, sensitive nipple; on his cock, oh god, on his cock, stroking him light and sweet, or fast and hard, demanding. It was usually around this point that Bradley would come, gasping and ashamed, his own hand around his cock a pale imitation of the one he truly wanted there.
Colin, for his part, was oblivious, his smiles carefree when he looked at Bradley, his eyes crinkling at the corners the same way they had when he and Bradley had first met.
Bradley felt guilty, a little, but not enough to stop. Not nearly enough to stop.
--------------------------------
Colin’s fingers were long and pale, elegant in a way Bradley had never really thought fingers could be before. Bradley always imagined that Colin’s should be poised over a piano or clutching the neck of a guitar, or something. They were musician’s fingers, delicate and strong.
“Bradley,” Colin said.
Right now they were gripping the neck of a beer bottle, his other hand toying with the label. The bottle was sweaty with condensation, and Bradley imagined that Colin’s fingers would be wet too, slippery and cool on the green glass.
“Bradley.” The hand fiddling with the label lifted to wave in front of Bradley’s face. “Ground control to Bradley, come in Bradley.”
Bradley shook himself, raising his eyes from Colin’s fingers to his face. “I’m listening,” he said, flushing guiltily. He raised his own beer to his mouth to try to hide it.
“You’ve been miles away.” Colin smiled, his dimple flashing with good humour. “What were you thinking about just then?”
Bradley swallowed a mouthful of beer. “Nothing,” he said, hoping his heated cheeks wouldn’t show in the dim light of the pub. “Just...” Bradley shrugged, at a loss. Colin opened his mouth to say something else, but Angel, bless her, took that moment to show up with another round of drinks. Colin’s bemused expression melted into a small, pleased smile as he took another beer.
Bradley sighed, strangely disappointed, and took another sip of his drink.
_________________________________________________________
The thing about Colin though, Bradley was slowly learning, was that he didn’t let things drop. For the next few days Colin watched Bradley when he thought Bradley wasn’t looking, his gaze calculating and intense, his face creased in a thoughtful frown.
Bradley pretended not to notice the way Colin’s eyes lingered on him after takes, the way Colin couldn’t stop staring at him all the time. The weight of his eyes felt like a brand against Bradley’s skin, hot and intimate and burning, and Bradley, god help him, couldn’t bring himself to mention Colin’s fixation. Didn't want Colin to stop.
A few days after The Pub Almost Incident, as Bradley had taken to calling it, Bradley closed his hotel room door and leaned back against it with a sigh. He and Angel and Katie and Colin had all gone round to the pub again for a pint after shooting had finished for the week, and Bradley was exhausted, a little drunk and a lot tired of pretending that he didn't see Colin's eyes following him. Tired of pretending that he wasn't looking back.
He didn't bother to turn on the lights, just stumbled towards the bed, kicking off his shoes as he went. He sat down heavily at the edge and started methodically stripping down to just his boxers; his arms got stuck in his shirt for a moment, but a bit of flailing and he was successfully able to extricate himself. The bed bounced under him as he flopped onto his back, making the world spin dizzily for a second. Bradley closed his eyes, and that helped a little.
The most distracting thing about this whole situation, the thing that drove Bradley absolutely crazy, was not actually the way Colin couldn't seem to keep his eyes off Bradley. It was the way Colin couldn't seem to keep his hands away from his mouth while he did it.
Tonight at the pub, for instance, he had been biting thoughtfully on a knuckle, his eyes dark and focussed on Bradley's face. He hadn't seemed to realize he was doing it, but it had been driving Bradley quietly insane all evening, leaving him flushed and uncomfortable, his dick hard and pressing up against the fly of his jeans as he tried to make normal conversation. It hadn't worked very well. Katie had even asked him if he felt all right, if he might have a fever, and Bradley could only laugh and try not to look at Colin as he shook his head, gulping down more booze than was probably wise.
But he just -- he couldn't help it. He didn't know what was wrong with him, what it meant that he couldn't stop thinking about his best friend that way. What it meant that he jerked off thinking about Colin's hands, rough against his belly, his cock, his ass.
Bradley squeezed his eyes shut tight, but the image of Colin, teeth white against the skin of his knuckle, wouldn't go away. Bradley could feel his cock, still half hard and aching from earlier that evening, start to go fully hard in his boxers. He whimpered and breathed out harshly through his nose, hand shaking a little as he cupped himself through his pants, imagining it was Colin's hand on him instead. There was a wet spot where precome had gathered at the tip -- he'd been so hard for so long -- and he rubbed the damp fabric against the sensitive underside of his cock. He squeezed a little, stroking himself once through the flimsy material before getting impatient for the feel of skin on skin and pushing the fabric down and off his legs, kicking his boxers to the foot of the bed.
He wrapped his fingers around his dick and pulled, his skin slick with precome and sweat, and imagined his short, wide fingers were Colin's long, thin ones. It was so much better without his pants in the way, just his own fist wrapped tight around the firm length of his cock, fucking up into his hand and imagining Colin's. Bradley turned his face to the side, muffling his groans into his pillow, dizzy with want and too much whiskey.
But it wasn't enough, wasn't...wasn't exactly what he wanted. He brought his other hand down to his balls, rolling them in his palm a little before moving down, fingers hesitantly touching his hole. He'd done this a few times before, fingers spit-slick and too rough and enough to make him come harder than he ever had in his life, but his fingers were too dry this time, catching a little painfully on the rim. Bradley rolled to the side, cock still held loosely in one hand, and got out the lube hidden in his bedside drawer. He coated his fingers liberally before bringing them back to the crack of his ass, spreading his legs wide as he traced down to the tight ring of muscle between his cheeks.
It was awkward, his cock in the way and his fingers clumsy and slick with too much lube, but he finally managed to get two in his ass. His stomach tightened as he rocked forward, shoving his fingers into himself with a lack of finesse fueled by need and inexperience as much as by the haze of alcohol blurring his vision. It was...god, it was so good, and Bradley exhaled sharply through his nose, trying to keep quiet; Colin was in the next room over, and the walls were flimsy.
Bradley bit his lip and twisted his fingers hard. He thrust his fingers in and out a few more times, breathing harsh in the quiet room as he imagined Colin's mouth on his cock, Colin's fingers in his ass. Imagined Colin listening to him in the next room, maybe touching himself to the rhythm of Bradley's moans.
It didn't take long after that; it never did when Bradley gave in and fucked himself like this, when he thought of Colin fucking him like this. It only took a few more rough pulls of his cock, a few more sloppy thrusts into his ass before Bradley came, sticky spurts over his fist as he groaned Colin's name, blissed-out and guilty and half hoping Colin couldn't hear him, half wishing he would.
________________________________________________________
Bradley was tense for a few days after The Second Almost Pub Incident, but Colin didn't corner him, didn't seem unusual at all, and Bradley allowed himself to relax slowly, a little bit every day.
But Colin was clearly more tenacious than Bradley had given him credit for. It wasn’t too long after he stopped expecting anything to happen that Colin knocked on Bradley’s hotel room door, using his extra key to slip in before Bradley could even get off the bed to answer the knock.
“Hey,” Colin said, all tense shoulders and faintly nervous energy. “You busy?”
Bradley settled back into his pillows, crossing his legs underneath him. “Nah, ‘course not, Col.” He patted the empty space next to him on the bed, smiling a little when Colin gingerly sat down next to his hip. “What’s up?”
Colin played with the edge of the rumpled blanket for a moment, mouth turned down thoughtfully. Bradley took the opportunity to stare at the neat, quick twists of Colin’s fingers against the dark blue of the covers.
“It’s just...” Colin started, his fingers stilling against the blankets. Bradley looked up to find Colin’s eyes fixed on his face, watching him.
"Just what?" Bradley asked after several moments of silence.
"Just..." Colin took a deep breath, clearly steeling himself for whatever he was about to say. "I've noticed you watching me," Colin said, words tripping over each other in his rush to get them out.
Bradley felt his breath stutter uncertainly in his chest. His grip on the blanket next to his thigh tightened, and he struggled to form any kind of coherent response, preferably one that wouldn't end with Colin punching him in the face, or worse, getting up and walking away.
Colin looked down at where his knee was almost touching Bradley's, and after a moment of tense silence, Colin looked up again, shyly, his eyes mostly hidden by his long lashes. "It's okay," he said, voice a soft whisper, like he was imparting a terrible secret. "I..." Colin swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing nervously in his throat. "I like it," he said, voice a little stronger now.
Bradley inhaled, a quick, startled breath. "You do?" It came out little more than a squeak. He swallowed hard and tried again. "Really?"
Colin laughed a little self-deprecatingly and nodded, looking anywhere but Bradley. "I'd noticed it before, you know," Colin said, voice low and serious. "I just didn't know what it meant."
"And you do now?"
Colin looked up, his eyes finally fixing on Bradley's. "Yeah," he said, his voice quiet and intense. "Yeah, I think I know what it means now."
Bradley swallowed, his mouth gone dry. "And you're okay with it?"
"Yeah, Bradley." Colin smiled. "I'm okay with it."
Bradley searched Colin's face for a minute, looking for any hint of hesitance. Finding none, he unclenched his fingers from the bedspread, lifting them to cup Colin's jaw, to trail across Colin's cheekbone. Colin's eyes closed and he tilted his face into Bradley's hand, subtly encouraging the soft exploration.
"Colin," Bradley whispered, his voice hushed. "Do you even know...?" he started, but couldn't decide on an appropriate ending to the question; there were too many. Do you know how long I've wanted you? Do you know what the thought of you does to me? Do you know that I could fall in love with you, if you'd let me?
Colin sucked in a breath, as if he had heard every possible ending to that sentence, and his eyes fluttered open to meet Bradley's. Colin's eyes were wide and serious, dark in his pale face. Bradley's fingers tightened on Colin's chin, holding him still for a kiss, slow and deliberate, and then another, until one kiss melted into the next and Colin was groaning into Bradley's open mouth, his wet tongue sliding obscenely against Bradley's as they kissed for long minutes.
They broke apart, and Bradley opened his eyes, needing to see Colin's expression. Colin's eyes were closed, his hand pushed under the opened zip of his jeans, the unmistakable movement of his wrist just visible above the cotton of his briefs. Bradley sucked in a breath, more turned on than he could ever remember being, fingers clenching where he'd wound them in Colin's thick hair. "Jesus, Colin," he said, mouthing the words against Colin's cheekbone, and Colin groaned, a long, harsh sound in Bradley's ear before turning his head and capturing Bradley's lips again.
lt was -- it was all more heady than Bradley had ever thought to imagine. He had thought about this, of course, had thought about how soft Colin's lips would be against his, how his fingers would clench desperately in the back of Bradley's shirt, but he hadn't ever known how wonderful it would be, how devastating. He licked softly into Colin's mouth, Colin sighing sweetly against his lips, their tongues sliding slickly together, insistent. Bradley brought his hand down between them, replacing Colin's hand on his dick, grasping the hot, thick length of him in his unbuttoned jeans. Colin tore his mouth away, breathing harshly against Bradley's neck, his fingers curling around Bradley's, showing him how to stroke.
"Fuck, Bradley," Colin said, his accent thick and barely intelligible, his breath hot against Bradley's throat as Bradley thumbed the head of Colin's cock.
Bradley worked his hand faster under Colin's. "I've thought about this," he said, a confession made into the silk of Colin's hair, his voice deep and rough.
Colin pulled back just enough to look into Bradley's face. "Yeah?" he asked, voice hopeful. His eyes were half-lidded, his mouth open and wet.
"Yeah," Bradley said, the hand not fisting Colin's cock coming up to cup the back of Colin's neck, to stroke the soft skin behind his ear. "Yeah, Colin. God, you don't even know."
Colin's eyes closed, his face crumpling like he was in pain even as he bucked up into Bradley's hand, even as his fingers tightened around Bradley's on his cock. "Bradley please," Colin breathed, hiding his face in Bradley's neck. He licked behind Bradley's ear, kissed his throat. "Fuck."
"That's the idea," Bradley said. Colin huffed a laugh into Bradley's skin, but it wasn't long before he started making little whimpery noises high in his throat and bucking up into their fists. "Yeah, that's it," Bradley said, working his hand faster, "come for me, Colin." Colin let out one last whimper, his breath hot against Bradley's skin, and then he was spilling over their hands, his fingers squeezing Bradley's almost painfully around his cock.
"Christ," Bradley said, kissing Colin's neck, the curve of his jaw. Colin's fingers went slack over his own, but Bradley kept stroking him, determined to wring out every little bit of pleasure he could. He only stopped when Colin made a little hurt noise and stilled Bradley's hand with his own. "All right?" Bradley asked, turning his hand so his wet fingers twined with Colin's.
Colin laughed breathlessly. "If by 'all right' you actually mean 'bloody marvelous,' then yes, I'm all right." He smiled a little dopily and caught Bradley's lips in another kiss, pressing his smile into Bradley's mouth.
Eventually they had to break apart to breathe, Colin whispering "lets get you naked, yeah?" into the curve of Bradley's cheek.
"Yeah," Bradley breathed, squeezing Colin's fingers once before letting go and proceeding to do just that. He had to stop every once in a while to watch Colin pull off his shirt, to see him push his jeans over his thin hips.
"Enjoying the show?" Colin asked when he caught Bradley staring.
Bradley smirked and pushed his own jeans down his legs. "Very much so, yes," he said, laughing when Colin blushed.
"Perv," Colin said affectionately, pushing Bradley onto his back. Bradley laughed and pulled Colin on top of him, and then swallowed as Colin's soft cock nestled up against his own achingly hard erection. Colin smiled, slow and soft, before kissing his way down Bradley's chest. He nuzzled Bradley's dick for a moment before pulling back to breathe over the head, to kiss the skin of his hip. "What do you want?" Colin asked, his voice a hushed whisper against Bradley's skin. He placed a chaste kiss there, following the sharp jut of bone down to Bradley's cock, which he then completely ignored in favor of nuzzling against Bradley's balls. "I'll give you anything," he said, and licked a slow, wet stripe up the underside of Bradley's cock.
Bradley gasped, dizzy with want. His back arched into Colin's touch, mind buzzing with all the possibilities. "Your fingers," Bradley said, eyes closing against the thought of Colin's delicate hands on him, in him. "God, Colin, your hands, please." His hips shifted beneath Colin's palms, restless, and Colin's fingers tightened, digging into the tender flesh.
"Like this?" Colin asked, fingers finding Bradley's cock and stroking experimentally. It was good, it felt so good, but it wasn't exactly what Bradley wanted. Bradley shook his head, breath coming in pants as he tried to articulate what he wanted, what he needed.
Colin gave one last pull to Bradley's dick before letting go, his hands wandering where his mouth had been only seconds before. "How about this, then?" Colin asked, fingers stroking Bradley's balls, giving them a light tug before moving lower, pressing against the tight skin between Bradley's balls and his hole. "Do you like this?" he asked, voice a teasing lilt.
Bradley tried to reply, but his mouth was too dry, his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth. He swallowed heavily, trying to get enough moisture back to answer Colin.
"How about this?" Colin asked, not waiting for Bradley to get his voice back before stroking his fingers around the entrance to Bradley's body. "Is this what you want?" His voice was a whisper, and Bradley could feel his soft breath against the sensitive skin of his cock. Colin's fingers traced Bradley's hole, his fingers gentle and curious and too soft.
Bradley whined, high in the back of his throat, and arched into Colin's touch. If the thought of Colin's fingers had been hot enough to make Bradley pant and moan, shameless in his need, the reality was enough to make him incoherent, wordlessly thrusting his hips into Colin's grip as Colin stroked him.
Colin kissed Bradley's thigh, his hip, before pulling away. Bradley whimpered.
"Do you have anything?" Colin asked, fingers still petting the tight skin around Bradley's hole.
Bradley took a moment to just breathe, to get his bearings back before nodding towards the nightstand. "In there," he panted, not releasing his deathgrip on the sheets.
Colin smiled, indulgent, and reached over to open the drawer, his right hand still against Bradley, a placeholder. He rummaged around for a moment before finding the lube and pulling back, popping the top with his thumb. He upended the tube over the fingers he had pressed against Bradley's hole, squeezing out a liberal amount right onto his skin. Bradley shuddered, moaning; it was cold, and felt so good against his overheated skin.
Colin spread the lube around, fingertip brushing against the tight ring of muscle teasingly. "This what you want?" he asked, pushing a long, perfect finger inside Bradley. "You want my fingers in you?" He thrust his finger in and out, carefully, stretching Bradley open as Bradley moaned and writhed, thrusting his ass up into Colin's strong grip. His dick twitched, neglected and angry red, but Bradley ignored it, focussing all his attention on Colin's hands on his thigh, in his body.
Colin chuckled, the sound rich and dark, and added another finger to the one already in Bradley. He thrust in with his fingers, hard, his thumb tracing around the edge of Bradley's hole, and Bradley bucked up, trying to get more of the sensation, feeling full and stretched and perfect. "God, please, Col," he managed to say, little more than an exhale, but Colin heard him. Colin added another finger, pressing in hard and fast and so good, and Bradley arched into Colin's hand, fingers grasping the sheets.
"God, Bradley," Colin breathed, his voice strangled. Bradley forced his eyes open, not even sure when they had closed, and looked at Colin. He looked as wrecked as Bradley felt, his hair plastered to his sweaty forehead, his cheeks flushed bright pink. His breathing was fast, harsh, and his eyes were fixed on where his fingers disappeared into Bradley's body. "You're so..." He trailed off, twisting his fingers inside Bradley in lieu of finishing his sentence.
Bradley reached down and grasped Colin's wrist, forcing his fingers in deeper, harder. He pulled his left leg up with his other hand, opening himself wider for Colin's fingers, for those long, slender, musician's hands he had been dreaming about since he first met Colin. "More," he groaned, uncaring how slutty he must sound. "Colin, more."
Colin closed his eyes, his breath coming in sharp gasps now. He leaned down and nuzzled the inside of Bradley's thigh, kissing the sensitive skin there. "Christ, Bradley," he said, but obligingly added a fourth finger. "You're so beautiful," Colin whispered, breath hot and moist on Bradley's skin. "Do you even realize how beautiful you are?" He fucked his fingers in, hard, punctuating his statement. Bradley gasped and moaned, bucking up onto Colin's fingers. "Could watch you forever," Colin whispered, voice barely audible. He licked around his still-moving fingers, the flat of his tongue pressing hotly against Bradley's skin.
"Oh god," Bradley moaned. Close, he was so close, just a little more and he would come, his cock untouched where it lay on his belly. He propped himself up on his elbows so he could watch Colin's hands on him, could see Colin's face.
Colin was looking up at him, bright blue eyes nearly black under the sweep of his lashes. Bradley couldn't see what he was doing, not really, could only see the vague movement of his hand, but he could feel it. It was all Bradley could do to keep himself propped up, to keep his arms steady enough underneath him that he could watch Colin's face, watch as his eyes fluttered closed.
Colin crooked his fingers inside Bradley, and that was it; Bradley was coming messily over his stomach, groaning like he was dying. Colin kissed Bradley's thigh, high up where it met his ass, and kept thrusting in, hard and fast.
"So beautiful," Colin was whispering as Bradley came down, "god, you're so beautiful." Bradley huffed a little, embarrassed, and closed his eyes against the ache in his chest Colin's hushed, fervent voice caused. Colin withdrew his fingers and Bradley whimpered, sprawling back bonelessly against the pillows. Colin chuckled, a bright, happy sound, and leaned up for a kiss, holding onto Bradley's hip tightly.
They broke away eventually, needing to breathe, and Bradley couldn't help but stare at Colin: his eyes, his tentative smile, the way he licked his lips nervously.
"I--" Colin started, but--
"I love you," Bradley said, interrupting. "I can't..." Bradley took a deep breath, centering himself, and then, "I just...need you to know that."
Colin stared at him for a moment, long enough that Bradley thought he might've said the wrong thing, might've miscalculated somehow, but then Colin was pressing up against him, taking his mouth desperately, every inch of his body against Bradley's.
"Love you," Colin said against his mouth, "god, love you so much," and then his tongue pressed into Bradley's mouth, and Bradley couldn't think for a long time after, busy as he was, showing Colin how much he loved him back.
ETA: header info'd be nice, wouldn't it? yeah.
Title: mets ton doigt (dans mon cul)
Author: likeaglass
Pairing: Bradley/Colin
Rating: NC17. YOU'RE SURPRISED.
Summary: Bradley's obsessed with Colin's fingers.
Notes: for hermette! :D Also, thanks to Frankie and Sarah for looking this over for me, love y'all!
The first thing Bradley noticed about Colin, even before he noticed his eyes or his ears or his smile, was his hands.
“And this is your costar, Colin Morgan,” Johnny Capp said, beaming as he introduced Colin as though he were a prized lamb at a fair.
Colin held out a hand, and Bradley shook it, a little surprised at the strength he could feel in his new costar’s grip, though Colin was a little slip of a thing, all gangly limbs and elbows.
“All right?” Colin asked. It sounded strange and lilting and almost indecipherable, and it took Bradley a good few seconds too long to stammer out an acceptable response. Colin’s eyes crinkled, and Bradley had enough time to think, “...oh fuck,” before Johnny started going on about schedules and rehearsals and god knew what else.
And the thing was, even though Bradley quickly noticed all the other endearing qualities about Colin -- his laugh, his shy blushes, the bright blue of his eyes -- it was still his hands that Bradley thought about most, that made Bradley swallow hard against the thought of what, exactly, those hands could do if they wanted.
Bradley was careful to never let on, of course. He didn’t want Colin feeling uncomfortable around him, or worse, avoiding him. In fact, it became very important very quickly that Colin liked Bradley, that he smiled at him and laughed at his jokes and was near him as often as possible. Bradley had never felt like this before, like his happiness depended upon another person, but Colin’s nearness quickly became the most important thing in Bradley’s life.
And it was fine for a while. Great even. Bradley saw Colin every day, on set and off, working and playing together. Colin became his best friend, the person he went to when he was upset or sad or happy, and it was...it was wonderful. Bradley had never met anyone like Colin, never knew there was anyone as fundamentally good as Colin, as sweet and caring and amazing.
But Bradley still thought about his hands. Thought about the strength in those long, slender fingers. About what they would feel like on Bradley’s body. Would they be soft and tender, hesitant? Or strong and sure, commanding as they worked Bradley into a helpless frenzy of want? Bradley thought about Colin’s fingers on him, thought about them on his face, cupping his chin; on his chest, tracing a tight, sensitive nipple; on his cock, oh god, on his cock, stroking him light and sweet, or fast and hard, demanding. It was usually around this point that Bradley would come, gasping and ashamed, his own hand around his cock a pale imitation of the one he truly wanted there.
Colin, for his part, was oblivious, his smiles carefree when he looked at Bradley, his eyes crinkling at the corners the same way they had when he and Bradley had first met.
Bradley felt guilty, a little, but not enough to stop. Not nearly enough to stop.
--------------------------------
Colin’s fingers were long and pale, elegant in a way Bradley had never really thought fingers could be before. Bradley always imagined that Colin’s should be poised over a piano or clutching the neck of a guitar, or something. They were musician’s fingers, delicate and strong.
“Bradley,” Colin said.
Right now they were gripping the neck of a beer bottle, his other hand toying with the label. The bottle was sweaty with condensation, and Bradley imagined that Colin’s fingers would be wet too, slippery and cool on the green glass.
“Bradley.” The hand fiddling with the label lifted to wave in front of Bradley’s face. “Ground control to Bradley, come in Bradley.”
Bradley shook himself, raising his eyes from Colin’s fingers to his face. “I’m listening,” he said, flushing guiltily. He raised his own beer to his mouth to try to hide it.
“You’ve been miles away.” Colin smiled, his dimple flashing with good humour. “What were you thinking about just then?”
Bradley swallowed a mouthful of beer. “Nothing,” he said, hoping his heated cheeks wouldn’t show in the dim light of the pub. “Just...” Bradley shrugged, at a loss. Colin opened his mouth to say something else, but Angel, bless her, took that moment to show up with another round of drinks. Colin’s bemused expression melted into a small, pleased smile as he took another beer.
Bradley sighed, strangely disappointed, and took another sip of his drink.
_________________________________________________________
The thing about Colin though, Bradley was slowly learning, was that he didn’t let things drop. For the next few days Colin watched Bradley when he thought Bradley wasn’t looking, his gaze calculating and intense, his face creased in a thoughtful frown.
Bradley pretended not to notice the way Colin’s eyes lingered on him after takes, the way Colin couldn’t stop staring at him all the time. The weight of his eyes felt like a brand against Bradley’s skin, hot and intimate and burning, and Bradley, god help him, couldn’t bring himself to mention Colin’s fixation. Didn't want Colin to stop.
A few days after The Pub Almost Incident, as Bradley had taken to calling it, Bradley closed his hotel room door and leaned back against it with a sigh. He and Angel and Katie and Colin had all gone round to the pub again for a pint after shooting had finished for the week, and Bradley was exhausted, a little drunk and a lot tired of pretending that he didn't see Colin's eyes following him. Tired of pretending that he wasn't looking back.
He didn't bother to turn on the lights, just stumbled towards the bed, kicking off his shoes as he went. He sat down heavily at the edge and started methodically stripping down to just his boxers; his arms got stuck in his shirt for a moment, but a bit of flailing and he was successfully able to extricate himself. The bed bounced under him as he flopped onto his back, making the world spin dizzily for a second. Bradley closed his eyes, and that helped a little.
The most distracting thing about this whole situation, the thing that drove Bradley absolutely crazy, was not actually the way Colin couldn't seem to keep his eyes off Bradley. It was the way Colin couldn't seem to keep his hands away from his mouth while he did it.
Tonight at the pub, for instance, he had been biting thoughtfully on a knuckle, his eyes dark and focussed on Bradley's face. He hadn't seemed to realize he was doing it, but it had been driving Bradley quietly insane all evening, leaving him flushed and uncomfortable, his dick hard and pressing up against the fly of his jeans as he tried to make normal conversation. It hadn't worked very well. Katie had even asked him if he felt all right, if he might have a fever, and Bradley could only laugh and try not to look at Colin as he shook his head, gulping down more booze than was probably wise.
But he just -- he couldn't help it. He didn't know what was wrong with him, what it meant that he couldn't stop thinking about his best friend that way. What it meant that he jerked off thinking about Colin's hands, rough against his belly, his cock, his ass.
Bradley squeezed his eyes shut tight, but the image of Colin, teeth white against the skin of his knuckle, wouldn't go away. Bradley could feel his cock, still half hard and aching from earlier that evening, start to go fully hard in his boxers. He whimpered and breathed out harshly through his nose, hand shaking a little as he cupped himself through his pants, imagining it was Colin's hand on him instead. There was a wet spot where precome had gathered at the tip -- he'd been so hard for so long -- and he rubbed the damp fabric against the sensitive underside of his cock. He squeezed a little, stroking himself once through the flimsy material before getting impatient for the feel of skin on skin and pushing the fabric down and off his legs, kicking his boxers to the foot of the bed.
He wrapped his fingers around his dick and pulled, his skin slick with precome and sweat, and imagined his short, wide fingers were Colin's long, thin ones. It was so much better without his pants in the way, just his own fist wrapped tight around the firm length of his cock, fucking up into his hand and imagining Colin's. Bradley turned his face to the side, muffling his groans into his pillow, dizzy with want and too much whiskey.
But it wasn't enough, wasn't...wasn't exactly what he wanted. He brought his other hand down to his balls, rolling them in his palm a little before moving down, fingers hesitantly touching his hole. He'd done this a few times before, fingers spit-slick and too rough and enough to make him come harder than he ever had in his life, but his fingers were too dry this time, catching a little painfully on the rim. Bradley rolled to the side, cock still held loosely in one hand, and got out the lube hidden in his bedside drawer. He coated his fingers liberally before bringing them back to the crack of his ass, spreading his legs wide as he traced down to the tight ring of muscle between his cheeks.
It was awkward, his cock in the way and his fingers clumsy and slick with too much lube, but he finally managed to get two in his ass. His stomach tightened as he rocked forward, shoving his fingers into himself with a lack of finesse fueled by need and inexperience as much as by the haze of alcohol blurring his vision. It was...god, it was so good, and Bradley exhaled sharply through his nose, trying to keep quiet; Colin was in the next room over, and the walls were flimsy.
Bradley bit his lip and twisted his fingers hard. He thrust his fingers in and out a few more times, breathing harsh in the quiet room as he imagined Colin's mouth on his cock, Colin's fingers in his ass. Imagined Colin listening to him in the next room, maybe touching himself to the rhythm of Bradley's moans.
It didn't take long after that; it never did when Bradley gave in and fucked himself like this, when he thought of Colin fucking him like this. It only took a few more rough pulls of his cock, a few more sloppy thrusts into his ass before Bradley came, sticky spurts over his fist as he groaned Colin's name, blissed-out and guilty and half hoping Colin couldn't hear him, half wishing he would.
________________________________________________________
Bradley was tense for a few days after The Second Almost Pub Incident, but Colin didn't corner him, didn't seem unusual at all, and Bradley allowed himself to relax slowly, a little bit every day.
But Colin was clearly more tenacious than Bradley had given him credit for. It wasn’t too long after he stopped expecting anything to happen that Colin knocked on Bradley’s hotel room door, using his extra key to slip in before Bradley could even get off the bed to answer the knock.
“Hey,” Colin said, all tense shoulders and faintly nervous energy. “You busy?”
Bradley settled back into his pillows, crossing his legs underneath him. “Nah, ‘course not, Col.” He patted the empty space next to him on the bed, smiling a little when Colin gingerly sat down next to his hip. “What’s up?”
Colin played with the edge of the rumpled blanket for a moment, mouth turned down thoughtfully. Bradley took the opportunity to stare at the neat, quick twists of Colin’s fingers against the dark blue of the covers.
“It’s just...” Colin started, his fingers stilling against the blankets. Bradley looked up to find Colin’s eyes fixed on his face, watching him.
"Just what?" Bradley asked after several moments of silence.
"Just..." Colin took a deep breath, clearly steeling himself for whatever he was about to say. "I've noticed you watching me," Colin said, words tripping over each other in his rush to get them out.
Bradley felt his breath stutter uncertainly in his chest. His grip on the blanket next to his thigh tightened, and he struggled to form any kind of coherent response, preferably one that wouldn't end with Colin punching him in the face, or worse, getting up and walking away.
Colin looked down at where his knee was almost touching Bradley's, and after a moment of tense silence, Colin looked up again, shyly, his eyes mostly hidden by his long lashes. "It's okay," he said, voice a soft whisper, like he was imparting a terrible secret. "I..." Colin swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing nervously in his throat. "I like it," he said, voice a little stronger now.
Bradley inhaled, a quick, startled breath. "You do?" It came out little more than a squeak. He swallowed hard and tried again. "Really?"
Colin laughed a little self-deprecatingly and nodded, looking anywhere but Bradley. "I'd noticed it before, you know," Colin said, voice low and serious. "I just didn't know what it meant."
"And you do now?"
Colin looked up, his eyes finally fixing on Bradley's. "Yeah," he said, his voice quiet and intense. "Yeah, I think I know what it means now."
Bradley swallowed, his mouth gone dry. "And you're okay with it?"
"Yeah, Bradley." Colin smiled. "I'm okay with it."
Bradley searched Colin's face for a minute, looking for any hint of hesitance. Finding none, he unclenched his fingers from the bedspread, lifting them to cup Colin's jaw, to trail across Colin's cheekbone. Colin's eyes closed and he tilted his face into Bradley's hand, subtly encouraging the soft exploration.
"Colin," Bradley whispered, his voice hushed. "Do you even know...?" he started, but couldn't decide on an appropriate ending to the question; there were too many. Do you know how long I've wanted you? Do you know what the thought of you does to me? Do you know that I could fall in love with you, if you'd let me?
Colin sucked in a breath, as if he had heard every possible ending to that sentence, and his eyes fluttered open to meet Bradley's. Colin's eyes were wide and serious, dark in his pale face. Bradley's fingers tightened on Colin's chin, holding him still for a kiss, slow and deliberate, and then another, until one kiss melted into the next and Colin was groaning into Bradley's open mouth, his wet tongue sliding obscenely against Bradley's as they kissed for long minutes.
They broke apart, and Bradley opened his eyes, needing to see Colin's expression. Colin's eyes were closed, his hand pushed under the opened zip of his jeans, the unmistakable movement of his wrist just visible above the cotton of his briefs. Bradley sucked in a breath, more turned on than he could ever remember being, fingers clenching where he'd wound them in Colin's thick hair. "Jesus, Colin," he said, mouthing the words against Colin's cheekbone, and Colin groaned, a long, harsh sound in Bradley's ear before turning his head and capturing Bradley's lips again.
lt was -- it was all more heady than Bradley had ever thought to imagine. He had thought about this, of course, had thought about how soft Colin's lips would be against his, how his fingers would clench desperately in the back of Bradley's shirt, but he hadn't ever known how wonderful it would be, how devastating. He licked softly into Colin's mouth, Colin sighing sweetly against his lips, their tongues sliding slickly together, insistent. Bradley brought his hand down between them, replacing Colin's hand on his dick, grasping the hot, thick length of him in his unbuttoned jeans. Colin tore his mouth away, breathing harshly against Bradley's neck, his fingers curling around Bradley's, showing him how to stroke.
"Fuck, Bradley," Colin said, his accent thick and barely intelligible, his breath hot against Bradley's throat as Bradley thumbed the head of Colin's cock.
Bradley worked his hand faster under Colin's. "I've thought about this," he said, a confession made into the silk of Colin's hair, his voice deep and rough.
Colin pulled back just enough to look into Bradley's face. "Yeah?" he asked, voice hopeful. His eyes were half-lidded, his mouth open and wet.
"Yeah," Bradley said, the hand not fisting Colin's cock coming up to cup the back of Colin's neck, to stroke the soft skin behind his ear. "Yeah, Colin. God, you don't even know."
Colin's eyes closed, his face crumpling like he was in pain even as he bucked up into Bradley's hand, even as his fingers tightened around Bradley's on his cock. "Bradley please," Colin breathed, hiding his face in Bradley's neck. He licked behind Bradley's ear, kissed his throat. "Fuck."
"That's the idea," Bradley said. Colin huffed a laugh into Bradley's skin, but it wasn't long before he started making little whimpery noises high in his throat and bucking up into their fists. "Yeah, that's it," Bradley said, working his hand faster, "come for me, Colin." Colin let out one last whimper, his breath hot against Bradley's skin, and then he was spilling over their hands, his fingers squeezing Bradley's almost painfully around his cock.
"Christ," Bradley said, kissing Colin's neck, the curve of his jaw. Colin's fingers went slack over his own, but Bradley kept stroking him, determined to wring out every little bit of pleasure he could. He only stopped when Colin made a little hurt noise and stilled Bradley's hand with his own. "All right?" Bradley asked, turning his hand so his wet fingers twined with Colin's.
Colin laughed breathlessly. "If by 'all right' you actually mean 'bloody marvelous,' then yes, I'm all right." He smiled a little dopily and caught Bradley's lips in another kiss, pressing his smile into Bradley's mouth.
Eventually they had to break apart to breathe, Colin whispering "lets get you naked, yeah?" into the curve of Bradley's cheek.
"Yeah," Bradley breathed, squeezing Colin's fingers once before letting go and proceeding to do just that. He had to stop every once in a while to watch Colin pull off his shirt, to see him push his jeans over his thin hips.
"Enjoying the show?" Colin asked when he caught Bradley staring.
Bradley smirked and pushed his own jeans down his legs. "Very much so, yes," he said, laughing when Colin blushed.
"Perv," Colin said affectionately, pushing Bradley onto his back. Bradley laughed and pulled Colin on top of him, and then swallowed as Colin's soft cock nestled up against his own achingly hard erection. Colin smiled, slow and soft, before kissing his way down Bradley's chest. He nuzzled Bradley's dick for a moment before pulling back to breathe over the head, to kiss the skin of his hip. "What do you want?" Colin asked, his voice a hushed whisper against Bradley's skin. He placed a chaste kiss there, following the sharp jut of bone down to Bradley's cock, which he then completely ignored in favor of nuzzling against Bradley's balls. "I'll give you anything," he said, and licked a slow, wet stripe up the underside of Bradley's cock.
Bradley gasped, dizzy with want. His back arched into Colin's touch, mind buzzing with all the possibilities. "Your fingers," Bradley said, eyes closing against the thought of Colin's delicate hands on him, in him. "God, Colin, your hands, please." His hips shifted beneath Colin's palms, restless, and Colin's fingers tightened, digging into the tender flesh.
"Like this?" Colin asked, fingers finding Bradley's cock and stroking experimentally. It was good, it felt so good, but it wasn't exactly what Bradley wanted. Bradley shook his head, breath coming in pants as he tried to articulate what he wanted, what he needed.
Colin gave one last pull to Bradley's dick before letting go, his hands wandering where his mouth had been only seconds before. "How about this, then?" Colin asked, fingers stroking Bradley's balls, giving them a light tug before moving lower, pressing against the tight skin between Bradley's balls and his hole. "Do you like this?" he asked, voice a teasing lilt.
Bradley tried to reply, but his mouth was too dry, his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth. He swallowed heavily, trying to get enough moisture back to answer Colin.
"How about this?" Colin asked, not waiting for Bradley to get his voice back before stroking his fingers around the entrance to Bradley's body. "Is this what you want?" His voice was a whisper, and Bradley could feel his soft breath against the sensitive skin of his cock. Colin's fingers traced Bradley's hole, his fingers gentle and curious and too soft.
Bradley whined, high in the back of his throat, and arched into Colin's touch. If the thought of Colin's fingers had been hot enough to make Bradley pant and moan, shameless in his need, the reality was enough to make him incoherent, wordlessly thrusting his hips into Colin's grip as Colin stroked him.
Colin kissed Bradley's thigh, his hip, before pulling away. Bradley whimpered.
"Do you have anything?" Colin asked, fingers still petting the tight skin around Bradley's hole.
Bradley took a moment to just breathe, to get his bearings back before nodding towards the nightstand. "In there," he panted, not releasing his deathgrip on the sheets.
Colin smiled, indulgent, and reached over to open the drawer, his right hand still against Bradley, a placeholder. He rummaged around for a moment before finding the lube and pulling back, popping the top with his thumb. He upended the tube over the fingers he had pressed against Bradley's hole, squeezing out a liberal amount right onto his skin. Bradley shuddered, moaning; it was cold, and felt so good against his overheated skin.
Colin spread the lube around, fingertip brushing against the tight ring of muscle teasingly. "This what you want?" he asked, pushing a long, perfect finger inside Bradley. "You want my fingers in you?" He thrust his finger in and out, carefully, stretching Bradley open as Bradley moaned and writhed, thrusting his ass up into Colin's strong grip. His dick twitched, neglected and angry red, but Bradley ignored it, focussing all his attention on Colin's hands on his thigh, in his body.
Colin chuckled, the sound rich and dark, and added another finger to the one already in Bradley. He thrust in with his fingers, hard, his thumb tracing around the edge of Bradley's hole, and Bradley bucked up, trying to get more of the sensation, feeling full and stretched and perfect. "God, please, Col," he managed to say, little more than an exhale, but Colin heard him. Colin added another finger, pressing in hard and fast and so good, and Bradley arched into Colin's hand, fingers grasping the sheets.
"God, Bradley," Colin breathed, his voice strangled. Bradley forced his eyes open, not even sure when they had closed, and looked at Colin. He looked as wrecked as Bradley felt, his hair plastered to his sweaty forehead, his cheeks flushed bright pink. His breathing was fast, harsh, and his eyes were fixed on where his fingers disappeared into Bradley's body. "You're so..." He trailed off, twisting his fingers inside Bradley in lieu of finishing his sentence.
Bradley reached down and grasped Colin's wrist, forcing his fingers in deeper, harder. He pulled his left leg up with his other hand, opening himself wider for Colin's fingers, for those long, slender, musician's hands he had been dreaming about since he first met Colin. "More," he groaned, uncaring how slutty he must sound. "Colin, more."
Colin closed his eyes, his breath coming in sharp gasps now. He leaned down and nuzzled the inside of Bradley's thigh, kissing the sensitive skin there. "Christ, Bradley," he said, but obligingly added a fourth finger. "You're so beautiful," Colin whispered, breath hot and moist on Bradley's skin. "Do you even realize how beautiful you are?" He fucked his fingers in, hard, punctuating his statement. Bradley gasped and moaned, bucking up onto Colin's fingers. "Could watch you forever," Colin whispered, voice barely audible. He licked around his still-moving fingers, the flat of his tongue pressing hotly against Bradley's skin.
"Oh god," Bradley moaned. Close, he was so close, just a little more and he would come, his cock untouched where it lay on his belly. He propped himself up on his elbows so he could watch Colin's hands on him, could see Colin's face.
Colin was looking up at him, bright blue eyes nearly black under the sweep of his lashes. Bradley couldn't see what he was doing, not really, could only see the vague movement of his hand, but he could feel it. It was all Bradley could do to keep himself propped up, to keep his arms steady enough underneath him that he could watch Colin's face, watch as his eyes fluttered closed.
Colin crooked his fingers inside Bradley, and that was it; Bradley was coming messily over his stomach, groaning like he was dying. Colin kissed Bradley's thigh, high up where it met his ass, and kept thrusting in, hard and fast.
"So beautiful," Colin was whispering as Bradley came down, "god, you're so beautiful." Bradley huffed a little, embarrassed, and closed his eyes against the ache in his chest Colin's hushed, fervent voice caused. Colin withdrew his fingers and Bradley whimpered, sprawling back bonelessly against the pillows. Colin chuckled, a bright, happy sound, and leaned up for a kiss, holding onto Bradley's hip tightly.
They broke away eventually, needing to breathe, and Bradley couldn't help but stare at Colin: his eyes, his tentative smile, the way he licked his lips nervously.
"I--" Colin started, but--
"I love you," Bradley said, interrupting. "I can't..." Bradley took a deep breath, centering himself, and then, "I just...need you to know that."
Colin stared at him for a moment, long enough that Bradley thought he might've said the wrong thing, might've miscalculated somehow, but then Colin was pressing up against him, taking his mouth desperately, every inch of his body against Bradley's.
"Love you," Colin said against his mouth, "god, love you so much," and then his tongue pressed into Bradley's mouth, and Bradley couldn't think for a long time after, busy as he was, showing Colin how much he loved him back.