I'm not meant to live alone, Turn this house into a home.
This weekend is going to be an intense one.
Saturday, I have the public library's semi-annual book sale + crafty day with Gretchen. My goal is to not buy more than 10 books - WE SHALL SEE HOW THAT GOES.
Sunday and Monday, though, are going to be the really big ones. Clay and I will be taking our farewell road trip up to Deception Pass on Sunday, spending the night (probably in my car, with the backseat folded down and lots of sleeping bags, blanket and pillows), and coming back on Monday. We'll get to Seattle late-morning/mid-day, and spend several relaxing hours at Banya5 (getting in on their early-bird happy-hour half-off price). And then he will go to work that evening (his new business venture of pedicabs, working the Mariner's game). And I will go home. And we will be officially broken up.
I have some very mixed feelings about this trip. I'm looking forward to this time, just the two of us, but I'm incredibly saddened by what it represents. I know that the break-up is the right thing to do, in order to have the kind of future that I want, but I love him fiercely and a part of me does not want to let this relationship go. I'll be taking some time for myself, but I also know that I'll be lonely quite often. So it's a mixed bag of very strong, and some conflicting, emotions.
I dislike being conflicted. I like to be what I consider my usual self: happy, optimistic, laughing, enjoying what I'm doing. To be feeling things like sadness, loneliness, fear, etc., is NOT a bad thing. On the contrary, it's good to feel and acknowledge one's full range of emotions and not deny their right to exist. But it's hard for me to enjoy (if that's the right word?) feeling those things, and being okay with it. My emotions swing so high and so low, so intensely that I don't really function at 100% when I'm in the lows.
So, with this busy Sat/Sun/Mon schedule (plus being out tonight), I'm taking Tuesday off for a mental health day. My supervisorlady knows the bare bones of what is going on, and she is very supportive of me taking the time that I need. I am hopeful that with having some time to myself, and just taking each day as it comes, and each emotion as it rises, I will be okay. Maybe even better than okay.
So I'm just going to prattle on here about some things I want for the future. This particular topic will be a House of Dreams theme.
I'm 28 now, and I've had a goal to buy a house on or before I turn 30. I've been stockpiling money away for several years now, and hope to have enough for a down payment by next year. Clay, who has worked in real estate and still has his license, has offered to help me with this process (yes, even after we're no longer dating). I think it will be good to take him up on this offer, as I have no freakin' clue what I'll be getting into, but he can explain it in terms I understand, and has recommended several books that I can read to get familiar with the process. I definitely plan to read up on this stuff, as I feel that being informed will give me a lot of negotiating power when the time comes.
I want to stay in West Seattle (oooooh, yessss). And the upper limit of my price range that I think I can manage is about $300,000. Naturally, I tend more towards the higher end of things whenever I have choices to make - and not on purpose, either! I just like what I like, and it turns out to be the most expensive option. Yikes. I also have an ultimate dream of a Tudor-style, brick house someday, but I doubt that will be in my price range. Also, I have a thing for brick houses - I call it the 3-Little-Pigs Syndrome. The brick house was the sturdiest, remember!
So, with that said, I like something like this 2 bed/1 bath cutie for $299,000. Look at the arched entryway through the hedge! I'd feel like I was entering fairyland (or I would make it so, anyway). And the walls with lovely saturated color, which I have been dying to do. And the huge kitchen! And the hardwood floors! Nomnomnom. However, I wish it had the square footage on the house, so I could see what the cost per square foot breaks down to, and compare.
This considerably smaller one is waaaay more within my price range, as just under $200,000. It's only slightly larger than my current apartment, and I suspect the layout is a little odd. But it does have some nice-appearing feature in the pics, but I'm not as wild about it as I am with the first one. Interestly, this cost per square foot is about $265 - that seems high to me!
This third one, with a whopping 5 bedrooms(!!!) is right in the middle, price-wise of the other two. I wish there were more pics of the bedrooms, but I love that there is a front porch, hardwood floors, a finished basement, and an actual master suite. Do you know what all I'd do with those five bedrooms? My bedroom (duh), guest bedroom, craft room (depending on the basement), future dog's room, and a shoe room. Okay, maybe I'm kidding about the last one (okay, two), and of course, if I was to start a family we could seriously grow into this house. And the cost per square foot is just about $120. So of the last two (since I can't factor in the first one), this is really a much better deal.
So that's just some current house-browsing. I'll see how much things change in a year with the housing market (up, down, or neither!). I've also been checking auction.com, to see if there's anything that catches my eye!
So, once I get this lovely fabulous home, or this fixer-upper full of potential awesomesauce, whatever shall I do with it??? Granted, a lot of these are things I have/am doing/could do right now, but when it's my own home, I think it will feel different somehow.
Well, I want to paint. Walls, especially in some gorgeous saturated colors, would be a ton of fun. And I've never painted anything before, so I reallllllly want to try my hand at painting large spaces.
I want to decorate. I love the decor and stuff that is in my current apartment, but I have a bunch of very nice things (glassware, wall hangings, vases, blankets) that are in storage back in my parent's basement in Wenatchee. I really want to start bringing all of these things together and getting to really enjoy them! A lot of them are vintage items from around the world that have been sitting in boxes for about 6 years now - they want to come out and play! I have a funky, electic, vintage flair to my taste, I think - I love Tiffany-style lamps and unusual wall art, pansy-painted china and odd items from my travels. I have a lot of "stuff," but every single piece means something to me, whether it's sentimental, makes me smile, intrigues my mind, or is functional. I have had people be fascinated when they come into my home, and start looking at the things. I don't feel like it's cluttered, but is interesting. And I want to expand!
I want to refinish furniture - like painting, it's something else I've never done. I've got some bookshelves and cabinets that I would dearly love to see what I could transform them into, especially the cheap-o Target pressboard stuff.
I want to start living as green as possible. Composting or a worm bin, energy-efficient windows, anything and everything I could do. If it was a fixer-upper, then I would have the opportunity to put a lot of my LEED training into place, and make it really eco-friendly. If it's a nicer joint that doesn't need a lot of renovation then there will probably be less replacement of stuff until much further down the road. I will be on a tight budget, after all. I also want chickens!!! BAWK BAWK!
I want to garden. I want to have a fruit tree (I'm nostalgic for the one I grew up with, a Lambert cherry tree), a veggie garden (for the "fruits" of my composting!), a rose garden, lots of lavender plants, all sorts of things. I adore working in the ground and feeling that warm soil that is so ALIVE. I want to plant and see what works and what doesn't. I'd save money by growing my own veggies and herbs, and some fruits (mmmmm, homegrown strawberries are awwwwwwwesome).
I would finally have room for my piano, and I could play regularly again! And this would be the first time EVER that I'd get to play simply because I wanted to, not because my parents or a scholarship required me to play. I do miss playing, and I enjoyed making beautiful music. My black baby grand in Wenatchee is what I will bring over to Seattle, as soon as I have the living space to do so.
Alrighty, that's enough rambling and day-dreaming for today. Tune in next time for more!
Saturday, I have the public library's semi-annual book sale + crafty day with Gretchen. My goal is to not buy more than 10 books - WE SHALL SEE HOW THAT GOES.
Sunday and Monday, though, are going to be the really big ones. Clay and I will be taking our farewell road trip up to Deception Pass on Sunday, spending the night (probably in my car, with the backseat folded down and lots of sleeping bags, blanket and pillows), and coming back on Monday. We'll get to Seattle late-morning/mid-day, and spend several relaxing hours at Banya5 (getting in on their early-bird happy-hour half-off price). And then he will go to work that evening (his new business venture of pedicabs, working the Mariner's game). And I will go home. And we will be officially broken up.
I have some very mixed feelings about this trip. I'm looking forward to this time, just the two of us, but I'm incredibly saddened by what it represents. I know that the break-up is the right thing to do, in order to have the kind of future that I want, but I love him fiercely and a part of me does not want to let this relationship go. I'll be taking some time for myself, but I also know that I'll be lonely quite often. So it's a mixed bag of very strong, and some conflicting, emotions.
I dislike being conflicted. I like to be what I consider my usual self: happy, optimistic, laughing, enjoying what I'm doing. To be feeling things like sadness, loneliness, fear, etc., is NOT a bad thing. On the contrary, it's good to feel and acknowledge one's full range of emotions and not deny their right to exist. But it's hard for me to enjoy (if that's the right word?) feeling those things, and being okay with it. My emotions swing so high and so low, so intensely that I don't really function at 100% when I'm in the lows.
So, with this busy Sat/Sun/Mon schedule (plus being out tonight), I'm taking Tuesday off for a mental health day. My supervisorlady knows the bare bones of what is going on, and she is very supportive of me taking the time that I need. I am hopeful that with having some time to myself, and just taking each day as it comes, and each emotion as it rises, I will be okay. Maybe even better than okay.
So I'm just going to prattle on here about some things I want for the future. This particular topic will be a House of Dreams theme.
I'm 28 now, and I've had a goal to buy a house on or before I turn 30. I've been stockpiling money away for several years now, and hope to have enough for a down payment by next year. Clay, who has worked in real estate and still has his license, has offered to help me with this process (yes, even after we're no longer dating). I think it will be good to take him up on this offer, as I have no freakin' clue what I'll be getting into, but he can explain it in terms I understand, and has recommended several books that I can read to get familiar with the process. I definitely plan to read up on this stuff, as I feel that being informed will give me a lot of negotiating power when the time comes.
I want to stay in West Seattle (oooooh, yessss). And the upper limit of my price range that I think I can manage is about $300,000. Naturally, I tend more towards the higher end of things whenever I have choices to make - and not on purpose, either! I just like what I like, and it turns out to be the most expensive option. Yikes. I also have an ultimate dream of a Tudor-style, brick house someday, but I doubt that will be in my price range. Also, I have a thing for brick houses - I call it the 3-Little-Pigs Syndrome. The brick house was the sturdiest, remember!
So, with that said, I like something like this 2 bed/1 bath cutie for $299,000. Look at the arched entryway through the hedge! I'd feel like I was entering fairyland (or I would make it so, anyway). And the walls with lovely saturated color, which I have been dying to do. And the huge kitchen! And the hardwood floors! Nomnomnom. However, I wish it had the square footage on the house, so I could see what the cost per square foot breaks down to, and compare.
This considerably smaller one is waaaay more within my price range, as just under $200,000. It's only slightly larger than my current apartment, and I suspect the layout is a little odd. But it does have some nice-appearing feature in the pics, but I'm not as wild about it as I am with the first one. Interestly, this cost per square foot is about $265 - that seems high to me!
This third one, with a whopping 5 bedrooms(!!!) is right in the middle, price-wise of the other two. I wish there were more pics of the bedrooms, but I love that there is a front porch, hardwood floors, a finished basement, and an actual master suite. Do you know what all I'd do with those five bedrooms? My bedroom (duh), guest bedroom, craft room (depending on the basement), future dog's room, and a shoe room. Okay, maybe I'm kidding about the last one (okay, two), and of course, if I was to start a family we could seriously grow into this house. And the cost per square foot is just about $120. So of the last two (since I can't factor in the first one), this is really a much better deal.
So that's just some current house-browsing. I'll see how much things change in a year with the housing market (up, down, or neither!). I've also been checking auction.com, to see if there's anything that catches my eye!
So, once I get this lovely fabulous home, or this fixer-upper full of potential awesomesauce, whatever shall I do with it??? Granted, a lot of these are things I have/am doing/could do right now, but when it's my own home, I think it will feel different somehow.
Well, I want to paint. Walls, especially in some gorgeous saturated colors, would be a ton of fun. And I've never painted anything before, so I reallllllly want to try my hand at painting large spaces.
I want to decorate. I love the decor and stuff that is in my current apartment, but I have a bunch of very nice things (glassware, wall hangings, vases, blankets) that are in storage back in my parent's basement in Wenatchee. I really want to start bringing all of these things together and getting to really enjoy them! A lot of them are vintage items from around the world that have been sitting in boxes for about 6 years now - they want to come out and play! I have a funky, electic, vintage flair to my taste, I think - I love Tiffany-style lamps and unusual wall art, pansy-painted china and odd items from my travels. I have a lot of "stuff," but every single piece means something to me, whether it's sentimental, makes me smile, intrigues my mind, or is functional. I have had people be fascinated when they come into my home, and start looking at the things. I don't feel like it's cluttered, but is interesting. And I want to expand!
I want to refinish furniture - like painting, it's something else I've never done. I've got some bookshelves and cabinets that I would dearly love to see what I could transform them into, especially the cheap-o Target pressboard stuff.
I want to start living as green as possible. Composting or a worm bin, energy-efficient windows, anything and everything I could do. If it was a fixer-upper, then I would have the opportunity to put a lot of my LEED training into place, and make it really eco-friendly. If it's a nicer joint that doesn't need a lot of renovation then there will probably be less replacement of stuff until much further down the road. I will be on a tight budget, after all. I also want chickens!!! BAWK BAWK!
I want to garden. I want to have a fruit tree (I'm nostalgic for the one I grew up with, a Lambert cherry tree), a veggie garden (for the "fruits" of my composting!), a rose garden, lots of lavender plants, all sorts of things. I adore working in the ground and feeling that warm soil that is so ALIVE. I want to plant and see what works and what doesn't. I'd save money by growing my own veggies and herbs, and some fruits (mmmmm, homegrown strawberries are awwwwwwwesome).
I would finally have room for my piano, and I could play regularly again! And this would be the first time EVER that I'd get to play simply because I wanted to, not because my parents or a scholarship required me to play. I do miss playing, and I enjoyed making beautiful music. My black baby grand in Wenatchee is what I will bring over to Seattle, as soon as I have the living space to do so.
Alrighty, that's enough rambling and day-dreaming for today. Tune in next time for more!