(no subject)
I have never even started on my soundtrack. I can't even believe Winston did this before me. It's so hard though. So many songs mean so much. So, I'm just going to start with what I know for sure and we'll go from there. OK? OK.
The Velvet Underground "Heroin". This song means so much to me on so many different levels, for so many different reasons, in so many different situations. The first time I ever heard it was while I was dating Joelin. We were lying on the bed talking when it came on and he just shot up out of the bed and ran around the room and serenaded me with it. He loved this song. He had also made a deal with God to only do Heroin twice a year (which he stuck to very well).
It does and always will relate to Joelin in my head but there are other things about it too. First of all, it's a stroke of musical genius. The song itself carries you through all the highs and lows of actually doing heroin. Everything from beautifully melodic to painfully grinding, and in the right order too. I love music that really makes an effort to make you feel what they are talking about.
The first line; "I don't know where I'm going, but I'm gonna try for the kingdom if I can" Anyone who knows me knows that's just the story of my life. All the descriptive poetry of needle use just excites my fetishes. "Away from the big city, Where a man can not be free, Of all of the evils of this town, And of himself, and those around" I repeat this to myself alot when things are getting on my nerves. Also the line about how everyone can just go take a walk. Yeah, I get put out with people in general a whole lot and these few lines go a long way to easing my angst. Last, but definitely not least, the song is my future. I plan to become a junkie when I retire. When I hear the song and all the things he's talking about easing with his heroin use I can just let things slide off my back knowing that I have a future in another relity that none of the people who bother me can touch. They can have this part of my life but when I'm retired they're all gonna have to "take a walk" now that's something to look forward to:)
Heroin, written by Lou Reed, performed by The Velvet Underground
I don’t know just where I’m going
But I’m gonna try for the kingdom, if I can
’cause it makes me feel like I’m a man
When I put a spike into my vein
And I’ll tell ya, things aren’t quite the same
When I’m rushing on my run
And I feel just like jesus’ son
And I guess that I just don’t know
And I guess that I just don’t know
I have made the big decision
I’m gonna try to nullify my life
’cause when the blood begins to flow
When it shoots up the dropper’s neck
When I’m closing in on death
And you can’t help me not, you guys
And all you sweet girls with all your sweet silly talk
You can all go take a walk
And I guess that I just don’t know
And I guess that I just don’t know
I wish that I was born a thousand years ago
I wish that I’d sail the darkened seas
On a great big clipper ship
Going from this land here to that
In a sailor’s suit and cap
Away from the big city
Where a man can not be free
Of all of the evils of this town
And of himself, and those around
Oh, and I guess that I just don’t know
Oh, and I guess that I just don’t know
Heroin, be the death of me
Heroin, it’s my wife and it’s my life
Because a mainer to my vein
Leads to a center in my head
And then I’m better off and dead
Because when the smack begins to flow
I really don’t care anymore
About all the jim-jim’s in this town
And all the politicians makin’ crazy sounds
And everybody puttin’ everybody else down
And all the dead bodies piled up in mounds
’cause when the smack begins to flow
Then I really don’t care anymore
Ah, when the heroin is in my blood
And that blood is in my head
Then thank God that I’m as good as dead
Then thank your God that I’m not aware
And thank God that I just don’t care
And I guess I just don’t know
And I guess I just don’t know
The Velvet Underground "Heroin". This song means so much to me on so many different levels, for so many different reasons, in so many different situations. The first time I ever heard it was while I was dating Joelin. We were lying on the bed talking when it came on and he just shot up out of the bed and ran around the room and serenaded me with it. He loved this song. He had also made a deal with God to only do Heroin twice a year (which he stuck to very well).
It does and always will relate to Joelin in my head but there are other things about it too. First of all, it's a stroke of musical genius. The song itself carries you through all the highs and lows of actually doing heroin. Everything from beautifully melodic to painfully grinding, and in the right order too. I love music that really makes an effort to make you feel what they are talking about.
The first line; "I don't know where I'm going, but I'm gonna try for the kingdom if I can" Anyone who knows me knows that's just the story of my life. All the descriptive poetry of needle use just excites my fetishes. "Away from the big city, Where a man can not be free, Of all of the evils of this town, And of himself, and those around" I repeat this to myself alot when things are getting on my nerves. Also the line about how everyone can just go take a walk. Yeah, I get put out with people in general a whole lot and these few lines go a long way to easing my angst. Last, but definitely not least, the song is my future. I plan to become a junkie when I retire. When I hear the song and all the things he's talking about easing with his heroin use I can just let things slide off my back knowing that I have a future in another relity that none of the people who bother me can touch. They can have this part of my life but when I'm retired they're all gonna have to "take a walk" now that's something to look forward to:)
Heroin, written by Lou Reed, performed by The Velvet Underground
I don’t know just where I’m going
But I’m gonna try for the kingdom, if I can
’cause it makes me feel like I’m a man
When I put a spike into my vein
And I’ll tell ya, things aren’t quite the same
When I’m rushing on my run
And I feel just like jesus’ son
And I guess that I just don’t know
And I guess that I just don’t know
I have made the big decision
I’m gonna try to nullify my life
’cause when the blood begins to flow
When it shoots up the dropper’s neck
When I’m closing in on death
And you can’t help me not, you guys
And all you sweet girls with all your sweet silly talk
You can all go take a walk
And I guess that I just don’t know
And I guess that I just don’t know
I wish that I was born a thousand years ago
I wish that I’d sail the darkened seas
On a great big clipper ship
Going from this land here to that
In a sailor’s suit and cap
Away from the big city
Where a man can not be free
Of all of the evils of this town
And of himself, and those around
Oh, and I guess that I just don’t know
Oh, and I guess that I just don’t know
Heroin, be the death of me
Heroin, it’s my wife and it’s my life
Because a mainer to my vein
Leads to a center in my head
And then I’m better off and dead
Because when the smack begins to flow
I really don’t care anymore
About all the jim-jim’s in this town
And all the politicians makin’ crazy sounds
And everybody puttin’ everybody else down
And all the dead bodies piled up in mounds
’cause when the smack begins to flow
Then I really don’t care anymore
Ah, when the heroin is in my blood
And that blood is in my head
Then thank God that I’m as good as dead
Then thank your God that I’m not aware
And thank God that I just don’t care
And I guess I just don’t know
And I guess I just don’t know