Undercover - Part Five (End!)
Title: Undercover, Part Five of Five
Author: mikes_grrl
Rating: Brown Cortina (NC-17+, for seksiness)
Pairing: Gene/oc, Gene/Sam
Warnings: AU, naturally, and maybe specific spoilers mentioned in passing. Nonetheless, let’s just wing it and say “post-2.08” for the hell of it.
Word Count: 17,900 in five parts (part five,2,700)
Summary: A murder happens that hits close to Gene; meanwhile, Sam gets dragged into the underground queer society of Manchester by the unlikeliest tour guide ever, and is quickly and dangerously in way over his head.
NOTES for final chapter: I have rarely re-written scenes as I have as much for this final chapter. I am still not certain I achieved what I wanted between Sam and Gene, but hopefully at least it is true enough to the characters as I have developed them in this fic. Well it's as good as it is going to get, anyway....
Background:
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Undercover, Part Five
“Mmmph.” Sam heard and felt the sound behind him, and felt the arm over his waist, and Gene’s breath against his neck. It was before dawn, and light was barely creeping in through the window. Gene was, if nothing else, exceedingly warm and Sam was very comfortable, as long as he did not really think about it. At all.
“Bloody…christ ‘oo used me head for a drum solo?” Gene mumbled, unmoving.
“That would be the responsibility of the stupid twat who drank himself to the bottom of a bottle of whiskey yesterday afternoon.” Sam mumbled back.
“Sam.” Gene sat up, too fast, and nearly howled in pain, grabbing his head with one hand and propping himself up with his other.
“No, you! You drank yourself to death yesterday. Welcome to ‘ell.” Sam rolled on to his back and glared at Gene. “AND you stole my bed.”
They stared at each other for a second, and it was obvious that Gene simply did not remember how he got where he was. “Gene, lie down, you look beat.” Sam rolled back over on his side and prayed for another hour or two of sleep, if Gene would just, for once, please just once, cooperate.
“Sam…”
“Lie down!”
“Oh crap don’t yell.” Gene whined and laid down, moving back to separate himself from Sam. “Damn.”
“You did it to yourself, don’t expect sympathy.”
“You are a grand comfort, you are.” Gene grumbled.
“Your Grand Comfort is cold. Move closer.” Sam shuffled backwards into Gene. He felt Gene pause, then relax, curling around him and putting his arm back over Sam’s waist. Sam smiled contentedly as the warmth seeped into him.
“Yer own grave, Sam.”
“Molest me and I will press charges, Gene.”
“Always enjoy a challenge.”
“Go to sleep.”
“No. I think I’ll lay here and let me headache do the conga.”
Sam snorted in laughter and Gene pulled him closer. “You took care o’Duane?”
“Nicked. Locked up. Confessed.”
Gene did not say anything, but Sam felt a slight squeeze from the arm around his waist, and it made him happy to know that Gene was free of worrying about the case. He wished there was some way he could talk to him about Mikey, to convince him that it was not his fault, but that might lead back to Harrison and Sam was not prepared to delved quite that deep. Sam could not change anything, and he knew that, but maybe for a while he simply could keep Gene from being quite so lonely. A worthy goal, but not one to talk about without sending the wrong message, so he stuck to the topic at hand.
“Told me that he gave some of that drug to Joseph. Nothing too malevolent there, Joseph just wanted me to relax and overestimated the dosage.”
“I was right.”
“Yes, Gene, you were right.” Sam sighed in exasperation.
Gene leaned in closer and kissed the back of his neck, catching Sam so off guard that he did not have time to react as Gene’s tongue moved in a languid circle, pressing heatedly against Sam’s skin. “There are better ways to relax a man.” Gene stopped, and simply laid down completely. “So you call ‘im?”
Sam started at the question, still distracted by the heat and intention of the kiss, then figured out what he meant. “Joseph? Yeah, broke his heart. I’m a real bastard.”
“I coulda tol’ you that, Sam.”
“A minute ago I was your Grand Comfort.”
“Still are. Still a heartbreaking bastard, too.”
Sam’s mouth went dry. “Am I breaking your heart, Gene?”
“Every day, Sammy boy.”
“Gene…I really need to tell you…”
“No, you don’t.”
“I do.”
“Don’t.”
“You don’t even know what I’m talking about!”
“Right, and I’d like to keep it that way.”
“Gene.”
“Sam.”
“Shit…”
“Just say it if you want me to leave. Might take me an hour to remember how to walk, but I can crawl out under me own power.” Gene said, sounding half asleep and nuzzling into Sam’s shoulder.
“No. Stay.”
“I planned to.”
“Bastard.”
“Yours…” Gene mumbled and drifted to sleep, and Sam wondered what he was going to say.
Sam woke up later with morning blazing through the window and Gene blazing at him, his eyes not quite clear but intense, propped up on one elbow as his other hand…
“Oh, shit.”
Gene grinned and looked entirely evil.
“You were there, you watched me.” Sam hissed as Gene’s fingers ran over his belly. His arm was thrust down the blanket Sam was wrapped in and his hand was under Sam’s tee shirt, so it was skin on skin and Sam’s erection answered accordingly as Gene fondled his abdomen obscenely, his touch hot and firm and simply everywhere. Sam was aroused and panicking at the same time and so remained completely still, unable to function, his brain cross-wired. Gene leaned down and began kissing his neck, and it was finally overload.
“Gene, stop stop stop!” Sam floundered, pushing Gene away. Gene let him, but did not remove his hand from the blankets, and stared at him.
“You asked me to stay.”
“That…this…wasn’t part of the bargain.” Sam physically pulled Gene’s hand off him.
“What bargain, Sam? When did we make a deal?” Gene’s eyes narrowed in displeasure.
“No, not what I meant. I mean…I’m not gay, Gene. I’ve never been with a man and I’m not entirely sure I want to start now.” Sam ran a hand through his hair and closed his eyes, wishing he started this particular conversation about two weeks ago.
Gene blinked, speechless and confused.
“Really, Gene, I’m not.”
Gene laid down on top of him, thumping into him like a cement block. “Now’s the time to tell a man you’re a virgin, when you got him in your bed and worked up. Good plan, for a prick tease.” Gene was not amused.
“I didn’t mean…! I’m not being a tease, damnit!”
“Yer lyin’, though.”
“No I am NOT!” Sam pushed at him.
“Then how did you know Mikey? And let me tell you, Sam, ain’t no man going to let the likes of Joseph snog ‘im unless he was willin’ to go there.” Gene did not wait for his defense and smashed into a kiss, sucking at Sam’s tongue until he was breathless, and moving his hand under the blankets again. When he pulled up he grabbed Sam’s face with his other hand, the one under the blanket scrabbling at Sam’s shirt as Sam squirmed in panic. “Damn right I was there when you jacked yerself off and you said my name.” Gene was furious. “You crawled into bed with me. You told me to stay. What the FUCK are you playing at?” He shook Sam’s face and clawed at his skin.
“Oh jesus, jesus, Gene, back off, for god’s sake…” Sam stuttered, fumbling, unsure of how to get away from the fury on top of him. Gene looked at him, hard, then stopped. Sam gulped for air as Gene stared at him, motionless. “I’m not playing at anything, I swear to god. I’m not gay…you just assumed, because I knew Mikey…I couldn’t tell you without it sounding bad, like was hiding or something, and then there was the party and …shit, Gene, I never meant to lead you on.” Instinctively, Sam reached out and cupped Gene’s face in his hands. “I was worried about you, so I asked you to stay. I know you cared about Mikey and blame yourself and I looked all over for you yesterday then I just found you here, at my place. I didn’t know what to do. I was just…worried.”
Gene was still breathing unevenly, but he took a deep breath then turned his head slightly to the side and kissed Sam’s hand. Sam’s eyes went wide as Gene looked back at him, smiling in understanding and relief and mischievousness. “Jus’ want to take care of an old fool, do you?”
It was worse than a loaded gun in his face, because this shot hit home before the hammer even fell. Sam froze as Gene bent down again, this time softly, and kissed Sam on the lips with a gentle, nudging touch. His hand under the blanket sunk down and played at the skin right above his pants, erotic and loving. Gene lifted his lips as Sam pushed half-heartedly against his shoulders.
“Let me do this, Sam.”
“I…I’m really not…”
“You think it matters now?” Gene’s hand dipped under his pants and stroked his cock, which gay or not was very hard. “Toss me out…” Gene gently kissed him. “Throw me to the bloody floor…but I’m taking this.”
“Oh, god…” Sam closed his eyes as Gene kissed him again. Sam thought about kissing back and did so before he decided how. He knew it was Gene and it tasted like Gene and somehow he thought that was wrong, that this was all wrong, but Gene’s mouth was warm and pushing into him erotically. Sam opened his mouth, wanting to say something, but he drowned himself with the sounds of his own pleasure, his tongue mixing with Gene’s until Sam was desperate for the sensation of Gene and he chased his lips. He did not know what to do with his hands, and even so did not really want to hug Gene, so he curled his arms up and ran his fingers through Gene’s hair, which made Gene groan into the kiss, sending an electrical charge through Sam’s body. Gene did not press into him, although Sam knew that he had a hard-on somewhere under the blankets; instead he kept working at Sam’s cock, his hand drifting and light, circling his fingers around the head and smearing the drops of pre-cum down the underside and rubbing his thumb there until Sam was nearly crying into his mouth, the kiss ragged and half broken. Finally Gene wrapped his hand around Sam’s cock and began gliding up and down, slowly building pressure and tension until Sam was shaking, his hips jerking.
“Come on, Sam…you made me wait too long for you….” Gene whispered. Sam opened his eyes and looked into the beautiful green eyes of the man making love to him, and he balled Gene’s shirt in his fists.
“Oh, fuck, Gene…please! Gene!” Sam folded up into Gene’s embrace as he came, gasping, in shock as Gene squeezed his throbbing cock mercilessly.
He heard Gene laughing. “Glad you ain’t queer, you bloody ponce.”
Sam could not say anything, and simply fell back on the cot, horrified and completely at peace with everything in the world anyway. Gene pulled his hand out and cleaned it on Sam’s blanket, and Sam just watched him without comment, wondering what it meant to love someone like this. Sam did not know, and did not understand, but he felt particularly marvelous right then.
“Now I know it was good, you’re not even screaming at me ‘bout yer sheets.” Gene laid down and rolled Sam onto his side so they were spooning again.
“You really think I’m in love with you.” Sam finally said, nestling down.
“Right certain of it.”
“Even if I’m not.”
He felt Gene go still behind him, and he spoke very softly as he answered. “Your rules, Sam.”
“Won’t be your bitch.” Sam said unhappily.
Gene relaxed and Sam knew he was smiling. “I believe we set the condition for that earlier. So unless yer feeling…”
“No no no, I’m not quite ready for that. No.”
Gene chuckled. “Then I guess you remain a free man.”
“Not really.”
Sam was not prepared for Gene’s reaction to that. He pulled Sam closer with a cry that was pained and quick, and rolled his hips against Sam’s ass.
“Oi, I’m not sure I’m ready for that, either…” Sam grabbed the edge of the cot to pull away.
“We both got pants on and two blankets between us. I’m a strong man, Sam, but I doubt even my ability to drill through all that.” Gene said breathlessly, pulling him back.
“Oh.” Sam still clung to the edge, uncertain of what was next.
“Girl.” Gene smirked, rolling his hips again.
“Any possible way I can enjoy the afterglow in peace?”
“No.”
“Gene…” Sam sighed and Gene grabbed at him, shoving his hips at his backside.
“Not now, Sam.”
Sam stopped. It felt weird to have Gene behind him, dry fucking him through the sheets, but the only thing that Sam thought then was how long it would be before Gene shagged another informant, or met some kid in an alley. Sam gritted his teeth.
Gene started panting, holding him so tightly that he could barely breathe, making fast, tight grinds against him. Even through pants and two sets of blankets, Gene’s hard on was furious and hot. Sam reached behind him and grabbed for Gene’s thigh, hoping for traction. Hearing him, he sounded just the way he did when he was fucking Mikey in the alley, and Sam blushed in anger.
“Gene…”
“Shhh….”
“No! You remember the first time you kissed me? In the Cortina?”
“Sam, I’m…busy…” Gene grunted as he talked.
“I mean it. You remember?”
“Yes, I remember! Shut up.” Gene tried plowing at him harder.
“You told me to leave off Joseph.”
Gene slowed down. “Yeah, yeah, I remember. You goin’ to let a man get off, or not?”
“You said he was the marryin’ kind, and I’m not.”
Gene stopped, breathless, but kept his tight grip around Sam. “Yeah.”
“Well I am the marryin’ kind, Gene.” Sam stopped there, not sure if he was taking this the direction he wanted to go, but he wanted to make it clear that he was not allowing this happen just because it was convenient. Gene was still motionless behind him, even if the hard on had not died down at all and was still pressing into Sam’s ass cheek through the covers.
Gene took a deep breath. “I was married for thirteen years, Sam, never once cheated on her, until the last year when it went all to hell anyway. Saw everything I wanted walking by me, everyday, never touched. Never even thought about touchin’.”
Gene moved his hips again. “I’ve fucked boys in alleys and behind counters and over desks and chairs and in the car. Only one I ever took to bed was Mark. An’ I lost him…even before that fight, I lost him....”
Sam nodded, regretting the conversation already. “Gene, I…”
“No, you want to know. You want to know why I kept fuckin’ Mikey.”
Sam did not know that was what he wanted to know, but it sounded right. It had bothered him for a while, in any case.
“Because I saw what I wanted every day and couldn’t ‘ave it. It was like bein’ married all over again, a damn prison. I couldn’t ‘ave who I wanted and I could not give up what little I had…he reminded me of you…jesus….I never thought…but jesus Sam, let me have this much…” Gene pressed his face into Sam’s back and he was shaking, grinding into Sam and finally beyond words, working himself back up. One hand he kept clasped to Sam’s body but the other he ran up and down it, almost massaging muscles as he traced them out with his touch. Sam was turned on and he really did not care what would happen next, or later, or tomorrow, because here was a beautiful place to be. He needed to let Gene know that, he had to tell Gene that it was going to be alright, that he was not going to leave him, and that he needed Gene to stay for him.
“You’re wrong…”
“Sam, please…just let me finish...if this is all I ever get, let me finish…” Gene pleaded, keeping his head down and powerfully thrusting.
“…Mark isn’t the only lover you’ve taken to bed…”
“Sam…don’ argue, damnit jus’ once…” Gene gasped in frustration. He was close, and Sam heard it in his voice, and felt the power surging through Gene behind him, his hands clutching at Sam’s body.
“…You forgot about me.”
Gene stopped for a moment, registering the words, then started fast, raging into the feel of Sam’s body against him. Sam grabbed for the edges of the cot, bracing himself with every working muscle against Gene’s strength, even pushing his head into the mattress for any traction he could get to keep from being shoved onto the floor. Gene tipped over with strangled yell, rolling forward onto Sam and nearly crushing him, his hips pounding at him, out of control, desperately repeating Sam’s name over and over into his ear. Sam laid still, knowing what he had done and what he had said in the moment, and realizing that he had somehow changed his life. No, he had changed both of their lives, and now both blankets needed cleaning.
They laid motionless, and Sam listened as Gene’s breathing came back under control. Gene ran a hand slowly down Sam’s side, and pressed his face into Sam’s hair, and it was gentle and loving and Sam thought he was preparing himself for something. Sam felt a twinge of panic then, wondering what Gene was thinking, wondering what he was thinking. Gene finally pulled back and rolled Sam over and looked at him. “I can leave.” It was a question, of a sort, and it was Gene’s way of trying to be diplomatic and gentlemanly, if Sam was having second thoughts.
“Why?” Sam shrugged. It was pointless to pretend they were not in it now.
Gene nodded and laid down, wrapping into Sam with his head on Sam’s shoulder.
“I don’t know what I’m doing.” Sam said quietly.
“Nothing new under the sun.”
Sam shook his head, annoyed and amused. “You’re in love with me.” He squeezed Gene into him, pleased with that idea, as bizarre as it felt to say it.
“Do you ever shut up?”
“Not until I get what I want.”
“You’ll ‘ave to let me recharge, Sammy boy, I ain’t as young as I used to be.”
“No! Oh for…I just want you to stay.”
“Me. Here. Anything else?” Gene grumbled into his chest.
“Give up the rest of them. I can’t…I won’t fight for you. You’re in this, or you’re not.”
“…works both ways, Sam.”
“…Yeah, I guess…it does…” Sam blinked in confusion.
“Deal. Now please, in the name of God, if you love me: shut up and go to sleep.”
Sam shut his mouth and kissed Gene’s forehead, then closed his eyes.
##########
Author: mikes_grrl
Rating: Brown Cortina (NC-17+, for seksiness)
Pairing: Gene/oc, Gene/Sam
Warnings: AU, naturally, and maybe specific spoilers mentioned in passing. Nonetheless, let’s just wing it and say “post-2.08” for the hell of it.
Word Count: 17,900 in five parts (part five,2,700)
Summary: A murder happens that hits close to Gene; meanwhile, Sam gets dragged into the underground queer society of Manchester by the unlikeliest tour guide ever, and is quickly and dangerously in way over his head.
NOTES for final chapter: I have rarely re-written scenes as I have as much for this final chapter. I am still not certain I achieved what I wanted between Sam and Gene, but hopefully at least it is true enough to the characters as I have developed them in this fic. Well it's as good as it is going to get, anyway....
Background:
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Undercover, Part Five
“Mmmph.” Sam heard and felt the sound behind him, and felt the arm over his waist, and Gene’s breath against his neck. It was before dawn, and light was barely creeping in through the window. Gene was, if nothing else, exceedingly warm and Sam was very comfortable, as long as he did not really think about it. At all.
“Bloody…christ ‘oo used me head for a drum solo?” Gene mumbled, unmoving.
“That would be the responsibility of the stupid twat who drank himself to the bottom of a bottle of whiskey yesterday afternoon.” Sam mumbled back.
“Sam.” Gene sat up, too fast, and nearly howled in pain, grabbing his head with one hand and propping himself up with his other.
“No, you! You drank yourself to death yesterday. Welcome to ‘ell.” Sam rolled on to his back and glared at Gene. “AND you stole my bed.”
They stared at each other for a second, and it was obvious that Gene simply did not remember how he got where he was. “Gene, lie down, you look beat.” Sam rolled back over on his side and prayed for another hour or two of sleep, if Gene would just, for once, please just once, cooperate.
“Sam…”
“Lie down!”
“Oh crap don’t yell.” Gene whined and laid down, moving back to separate himself from Sam. “Damn.”
“You did it to yourself, don’t expect sympathy.”
“You are a grand comfort, you are.” Gene grumbled.
“Your Grand Comfort is cold. Move closer.” Sam shuffled backwards into Gene. He felt Gene pause, then relax, curling around him and putting his arm back over Sam’s waist. Sam smiled contentedly as the warmth seeped into him.
“Yer own grave, Sam.”
“Molest me and I will press charges, Gene.”
“Always enjoy a challenge.”
“Go to sleep.”
“No. I think I’ll lay here and let me headache do the conga.”
Sam snorted in laughter and Gene pulled him closer. “You took care o’Duane?”
“Nicked. Locked up. Confessed.”
Gene did not say anything, but Sam felt a slight squeeze from the arm around his waist, and it made him happy to know that Gene was free of worrying about the case. He wished there was some way he could talk to him about Mikey, to convince him that it was not his fault, but that might lead back to Harrison and Sam was not prepared to delved quite that deep. Sam could not change anything, and he knew that, but maybe for a while he simply could keep Gene from being quite so lonely. A worthy goal, but not one to talk about without sending the wrong message, so he stuck to the topic at hand.
“Told me that he gave some of that drug to Joseph. Nothing too malevolent there, Joseph just wanted me to relax and overestimated the dosage.”
“I was right.”
“Yes, Gene, you were right.” Sam sighed in exasperation.
Gene leaned in closer and kissed the back of his neck, catching Sam so off guard that he did not have time to react as Gene’s tongue moved in a languid circle, pressing heatedly against Sam’s skin. “There are better ways to relax a man.” Gene stopped, and simply laid down completely. “So you call ‘im?”
Sam started at the question, still distracted by the heat and intention of the kiss, then figured out what he meant. “Joseph? Yeah, broke his heart. I’m a real bastard.”
“I coulda tol’ you that, Sam.”
“A minute ago I was your Grand Comfort.”
“Still are. Still a heartbreaking bastard, too.”
Sam’s mouth went dry. “Am I breaking your heart, Gene?”
“Every day, Sammy boy.”
“Gene…I really need to tell you…”
“No, you don’t.”
“I do.”
“Don’t.”
“You don’t even know what I’m talking about!”
“Right, and I’d like to keep it that way.”
“Gene.”
“Sam.”
“Shit…”
“Just say it if you want me to leave. Might take me an hour to remember how to walk, but I can crawl out under me own power.” Gene said, sounding half asleep and nuzzling into Sam’s shoulder.
“No. Stay.”
“I planned to.”
“Bastard.”
“Yours…” Gene mumbled and drifted to sleep, and Sam wondered what he was going to say.
Sam woke up later with morning blazing through the window and Gene blazing at him, his eyes not quite clear but intense, propped up on one elbow as his other hand…
“Oh, shit.”
Gene grinned and looked entirely evil.
“You were there, you watched me.” Sam hissed as Gene’s fingers ran over his belly. His arm was thrust down the blanket Sam was wrapped in and his hand was under Sam’s tee shirt, so it was skin on skin and Sam’s erection answered accordingly as Gene fondled his abdomen obscenely, his touch hot and firm and simply everywhere. Sam was aroused and panicking at the same time and so remained completely still, unable to function, his brain cross-wired. Gene leaned down and began kissing his neck, and it was finally overload.
“Gene, stop stop stop!” Sam floundered, pushing Gene away. Gene let him, but did not remove his hand from the blankets, and stared at him.
“You asked me to stay.”
“That…this…wasn’t part of the bargain.” Sam physically pulled Gene’s hand off him.
“What bargain, Sam? When did we make a deal?” Gene’s eyes narrowed in displeasure.
“No, not what I meant. I mean…I’m not gay, Gene. I’ve never been with a man and I’m not entirely sure I want to start now.” Sam ran a hand through his hair and closed his eyes, wishing he started this particular conversation about two weeks ago.
Gene blinked, speechless and confused.
“Really, Gene, I’m not.”
Gene laid down on top of him, thumping into him like a cement block. “Now’s the time to tell a man you’re a virgin, when you got him in your bed and worked up. Good plan, for a prick tease.” Gene was not amused.
“I didn’t mean…! I’m not being a tease, damnit!”
“Yer lyin’, though.”
“No I am NOT!” Sam pushed at him.
“Then how did you know Mikey? And let me tell you, Sam, ain’t no man going to let the likes of Joseph snog ‘im unless he was willin’ to go there.” Gene did not wait for his defense and smashed into a kiss, sucking at Sam’s tongue until he was breathless, and moving his hand under the blankets again. When he pulled up he grabbed Sam’s face with his other hand, the one under the blanket scrabbling at Sam’s shirt as Sam squirmed in panic. “Damn right I was there when you jacked yerself off and you said my name.” Gene was furious. “You crawled into bed with me. You told me to stay. What the FUCK are you playing at?” He shook Sam’s face and clawed at his skin.
“Oh jesus, jesus, Gene, back off, for god’s sake…” Sam stuttered, fumbling, unsure of how to get away from the fury on top of him. Gene looked at him, hard, then stopped. Sam gulped for air as Gene stared at him, motionless. “I’m not playing at anything, I swear to god. I’m not gay…you just assumed, because I knew Mikey…I couldn’t tell you without it sounding bad, like was hiding or something, and then there was the party and …shit, Gene, I never meant to lead you on.” Instinctively, Sam reached out and cupped Gene’s face in his hands. “I was worried about you, so I asked you to stay. I know you cared about Mikey and blame yourself and I looked all over for you yesterday then I just found you here, at my place. I didn’t know what to do. I was just…worried.”
Gene was still breathing unevenly, but he took a deep breath then turned his head slightly to the side and kissed Sam’s hand. Sam’s eyes went wide as Gene looked back at him, smiling in understanding and relief and mischievousness. “Jus’ want to take care of an old fool, do you?”
It was worse than a loaded gun in his face, because this shot hit home before the hammer even fell. Sam froze as Gene bent down again, this time softly, and kissed Sam on the lips with a gentle, nudging touch. His hand under the blanket sunk down and played at the skin right above his pants, erotic and loving. Gene lifted his lips as Sam pushed half-heartedly against his shoulders.
“Let me do this, Sam.”
“I…I’m really not…”
“You think it matters now?” Gene’s hand dipped under his pants and stroked his cock, which gay or not was very hard. “Toss me out…” Gene gently kissed him. “Throw me to the bloody floor…but I’m taking this.”
“Oh, god…” Sam closed his eyes as Gene kissed him again. Sam thought about kissing back and did so before he decided how. He knew it was Gene and it tasted like Gene and somehow he thought that was wrong, that this was all wrong, but Gene’s mouth was warm and pushing into him erotically. Sam opened his mouth, wanting to say something, but he drowned himself with the sounds of his own pleasure, his tongue mixing with Gene’s until Sam was desperate for the sensation of Gene and he chased his lips. He did not know what to do with his hands, and even so did not really want to hug Gene, so he curled his arms up and ran his fingers through Gene’s hair, which made Gene groan into the kiss, sending an electrical charge through Sam’s body. Gene did not press into him, although Sam knew that he had a hard-on somewhere under the blankets; instead he kept working at Sam’s cock, his hand drifting and light, circling his fingers around the head and smearing the drops of pre-cum down the underside and rubbing his thumb there until Sam was nearly crying into his mouth, the kiss ragged and half broken. Finally Gene wrapped his hand around Sam’s cock and began gliding up and down, slowly building pressure and tension until Sam was shaking, his hips jerking.
“Come on, Sam…you made me wait too long for you….” Gene whispered. Sam opened his eyes and looked into the beautiful green eyes of the man making love to him, and he balled Gene’s shirt in his fists.
“Oh, fuck, Gene…please! Gene!” Sam folded up into Gene’s embrace as he came, gasping, in shock as Gene squeezed his throbbing cock mercilessly.
He heard Gene laughing. “Glad you ain’t queer, you bloody ponce.”
Sam could not say anything, and simply fell back on the cot, horrified and completely at peace with everything in the world anyway. Gene pulled his hand out and cleaned it on Sam’s blanket, and Sam just watched him without comment, wondering what it meant to love someone like this. Sam did not know, and did not understand, but he felt particularly marvelous right then.
“Now I know it was good, you’re not even screaming at me ‘bout yer sheets.” Gene laid down and rolled Sam onto his side so they were spooning again.
“You really think I’m in love with you.” Sam finally said, nestling down.
“Right certain of it.”
“Even if I’m not.”
He felt Gene go still behind him, and he spoke very softly as he answered. “Your rules, Sam.”
“Won’t be your bitch.” Sam said unhappily.
Gene relaxed and Sam knew he was smiling. “I believe we set the condition for that earlier. So unless yer feeling…”
“No no no, I’m not quite ready for that. No.”
Gene chuckled. “Then I guess you remain a free man.”
“Not really.”
Sam was not prepared for Gene’s reaction to that. He pulled Sam closer with a cry that was pained and quick, and rolled his hips against Sam’s ass.
“Oi, I’m not sure I’m ready for that, either…” Sam grabbed the edge of the cot to pull away.
“We both got pants on and two blankets between us. I’m a strong man, Sam, but I doubt even my ability to drill through all that.” Gene said breathlessly, pulling him back.
“Oh.” Sam still clung to the edge, uncertain of what was next.
“Girl.” Gene smirked, rolling his hips again.
“Any possible way I can enjoy the afterglow in peace?”
“No.”
“Gene…” Sam sighed and Gene grabbed at him, shoving his hips at his backside.
“Not now, Sam.”
Sam stopped. It felt weird to have Gene behind him, dry fucking him through the sheets, but the only thing that Sam thought then was how long it would be before Gene shagged another informant, or met some kid in an alley. Sam gritted his teeth.
Gene started panting, holding him so tightly that he could barely breathe, making fast, tight grinds against him. Even through pants and two sets of blankets, Gene’s hard on was furious and hot. Sam reached behind him and grabbed for Gene’s thigh, hoping for traction. Hearing him, he sounded just the way he did when he was fucking Mikey in the alley, and Sam blushed in anger.
“Gene…”
“Shhh….”
“No! You remember the first time you kissed me? In the Cortina?”
“Sam, I’m…busy…” Gene grunted as he talked.
“I mean it. You remember?”
“Yes, I remember! Shut up.” Gene tried plowing at him harder.
“You told me to leave off Joseph.”
Gene slowed down. “Yeah, yeah, I remember. You goin’ to let a man get off, or not?”
“You said he was the marryin’ kind, and I’m not.”
Gene stopped, breathless, but kept his tight grip around Sam. “Yeah.”
“Well I am the marryin’ kind, Gene.” Sam stopped there, not sure if he was taking this the direction he wanted to go, but he wanted to make it clear that he was not allowing this happen just because it was convenient. Gene was still motionless behind him, even if the hard on had not died down at all and was still pressing into Sam’s ass cheek through the covers.
Gene took a deep breath. “I was married for thirteen years, Sam, never once cheated on her, until the last year when it went all to hell anyway. Saw everything I wanted walking by me, everyday, never touched. Never even thought about touchin’.”
Gene moved his hips again. “I’ve fucked boys in alleys and behind counters and over desks and chairs and in the car. Only one I ever took to bed was Mark. An’ I lost him…even before that fight, I lost him....”
Sam nodded, regretting the conversation already. “Gene, I…”
“No, you want to know. You want to know why I kept fuckin’ Mikey.”
Sam did not know that was what he wanted to know, but it sounded right. It had bothered him for a while, in any case.
“Because I saw what I wanted every day and couldn’t ‘ave it. It was like bein’ married all over again, a damn prison. I couldn’t ‘ave who I wanted and I could not give up what little I had…he reminded me of you…jesus….I never thought…but jesus Sam, let me have this much…” Gene pressed his face into Sam’s back and he was shaking, grinding into Sam and finally beyond words, working himself back up. One hand he kept clasped to Sam’s body but the other he ran up and down it, almost massaging muscles as he traced them out with his touch. Sam was turned on and he really did not care what would happen next, or later, or tomorrow, because here was a beautiful place to be. He needed to let Gene know that, he had to tell Gene that it was going to be alright, that he was not going to leave him, and that he needed Gene to stay for him.
“You’re wrong…”
“Sam, please…just let me finish...if this is all I ever get, let me finish…” Gene pleaded, keeping his head down and powerfully thrusting.
“…Mark isn’t the only lover you’ve taken to bed…”
“Sam…don’ argue, damnit jus’ once…” Gene gasped in frustration. He was close, and Sam heard it in his voice, and felt the power surging through Gene behind him, his hands clutching at Sam’s body.
“…You forgot about me.”
Gene stopped for a moment, registering the words, then started fast, raging into the feel of Sam’s body against him. Sam grabbed for the edges of the cot, bracing himself with every working muscle against Gene’s strength, even pushing his head into the mattress for any traction he could get to keep from being shoved onto the floor. Gene tipped over with strangled yell, rolling forward onto Sam and nearly crushing him, his hips pounding at him, out of control, desperately repeating Sam’s name over and over into his ear. Sam laid still, knowing what he had done and what he had said in the moment, and realizing that he had somehow changed his life. No, he had changed both of their lives, and now both blankets needed cleaning.
They laid motionless, and Sam listened as Gene’s breathing came back under control. Gene ran a hand slowly down Sam’s side, and pressed his face into Sam’s hair, and it was gentle and loving and Sam thought he was preparing himself for something. Sam felt a twinge of panic then, wondering what Gene was thinking, wondering what he was thinking. Gene finally pulled back and rolled Sam over and looked at him. “I can leave.” It was a question, of a sort, and it was Gene’s way of trying to be diplomatic and gentlemanly, if Sam was having second thoughts.
“Why?” Sam shrugged. It was pointless to pretend they were not in it now.
Gene nodded and laid down, wrapping into Sam with his head on Sam’s shoulder.
“I don’t know what I’m doing.” Sam said quietly.
“Nothing new under the sun.”
Sam shook his head, annoyed and amused. “You’re in love with me.” He squeezed Gene into him, pleased with that idea, as bizarre as it felt to say it.
“Do you ever shut up?”
“Not until I get what I want.”
“You’ll ‘ave to let me recharge, Sammy boy, I ain’t as young as I used to be.”
“No! Oh for…I just want you to stay.”
“Me. Here. Anything else?” Gene grumbled into his chest.
“Give up the rest of them. I can’t…I won’t fight for you. You’re in this, or you’re not.”
“…works both ways, Sam.”
“…Yeah, I guess…it does…” Sam blinked in confusion.
“Deal. Now please, in the name of God, if you love me: shut up and go to sleep.”
Sam shut his mouth and kissed Gene’s forehead, then closed his eyes.
##########