How We Smashed Johari's Window (part two) by halotolerant, Brown Cortina, Gene/Sam

[halotolerant]

I have been chewing all your ears off about this monster fic of mine, and now 'tis done! My type of LJ account doesn't seem to let me post more than ~5000 words in one go, so to prevent this 25,000+ thing clogging everyone's f-lists I think the best thing is probably to post it in chunks of a few chapters at a time BUT it is finished and will keep

Comments

" so far, so Gene Hunt"

[draycevixen]

And how! I can't get over how successful you are at getting inside his head.

>>Thus he and Sam had yelled, grabbed each other, tussled in the corridor, fallen into the locker room and broken a chair.

Just another Wednesday really.<<

>>“Nah. Full. Time go home.” Gene insisted, finally grabbing Sam and the coat and inserting the one into the other through brute force. <<

Gene's refusal to articulate what's happened between them? Brilliant.

>>And, that? The later stuff? That hadn’t happened. But remembering the tea and TV, that was OK. Just about.<<

His reluctance, his decision to live a "certain way" just *really* makes sense to me but I've told you all of this before, but thanks... again!

BTW I know you've already finished writing the story but is it too shallow of me to hope that Gene finally recalls "the later stuff?" :D

Re: " so far, so Gene Hunt"

[halotolerant]

Why yes indeed he recalls it! (I wouldn't make people sit through 25000+ words without smut! I'm a shallow author and proud of it!) In part three, in fact, up now! *pimps self shamelessly*

Gene's articulation thing - I'm so glad you like that. That is where this came from - the 'words challenge' response that I had was that bunny, but as I say, it kind of got past that!

Yay for more feedback! Thank you :D

Re: " so far, so Gene Hunt"

[draycevixen]

Well it's not really about the smut -- well, maybe in part *cough* -- it's about wanting to know the whole story. The thing is that it might well be in character for Gene never to allow himself to *think* about it in detail so I wasn't sure we'd ever find out.

Part 3 up? Fantastic! Apart from more to read it gives me the perfect excuse to NOT watch the Redskins game with the gang *refuses to be culturally assimilated*

[lozenger8]

“I’ve got your reports, dated, signed, everything. I’ve got your charge sheets. I’ve got a bleeding birthday card from you with a fucking teddy bear on it that you thought was funny. ”

*loves on you* HE SO WOULD.

Okay, you have me, I'm gripped in your tight hold, do your worst.

This is so, so great and I am gleeful and yay, your writing wins me over in every single way.

[halotolerant]

Aw, cheers hon! I take a fiendish glee in your grippedness :D
Thank you <3

[angeweeks]

Have just sat and read both parts in absolute rapture. Looked up and realised there is a world around me :)

I am LOVING this. I can't wait to read the rest. Thank you!

[halotolerant]

Thank you! That's very kind. More is now up, cheers for feeding back :D

[hambelandjemima]

…Sam clearly itching for a self-righteous argument.
Love that line. So Sam.

And you've got into Gene's head so well. Men like him would try and deny their true tendencies because of the way they lived and were brought up.

*off to the next chapter*

[m31andy]

Just passing through, don't mind me...

Am loving this a lot! The flake mug - those darn things get *everywhere*, don't they???

Just a little nitpick:

Gene drained the end of his pint - he’d only had three, felt like more - and put the glass down amongst the ones Ray, Chris and Annie had left as they had slipped away and home to whoever they had waiting.
Then Gene had risen with a slight wobble and clapped Sam on the back.

Not sure about the "three" in this. Even if it felt like more, there's no way that three pints of 70's bitter would affect Gene at all. If you're into amending at all, I'd suggest you up that slightly - maybe five or six.

(I recall an anecdote of one of my dad's friends regularly drinking 18 pints of mild on a Saturday night. Admittedly the guy is most likely dead of cirrhosis of the liver now, but still...)

I wouldn't comment on it, but it knocked me out of the story. Which is not what you want really.

Now if you will excuse me, I'm off to read the rest.....

*g*

[halotolerant]

I kept meaning to come back and (a) thank you for pointing this out and (b) change it and I kept forgetting! But here I am at last - cheers for nitpick (I'm always glad to learn how to make something better) and I'm so glad you spotted the flake reference, I did say I was putting one in specially didn't I?
:D