Ten Penny Mix by norfolkdumpling. Green Cortina. Sam/Gene
Title: Ten Penny Mix
Author: norfolkdumpling
Pairing: Sam/Gene
Rating: Green Cortina for suggestion.
Word Count: 419
Disclaimer: Neither characters or sweeties are remotely mine. Wish they were though. I'm sure they all taste great ;)
Warning: Very silly. May cause repeated trips to the corner shop.
Notes: I'm sorry about this. It's inspired by
fawsley's Kitchen Sink Science and the comments thereafter. (Also written for her to help ward off the evil shingles). I've never written fic before, and you're about to find out why, but this disturbing idea just got stuck in my head. So apologies all round, and the family packs of Cola Bottles are on me as compensation.
Ten Penny Mix
“Guv? Why are there sweets on my bathroom floor?”
“Dunno. You’re the ace detective Gladys. Why don’t you investigate them.”
“Huh?”
“What do we do when we see a piece of evidence on the ground Tyler?”
“Wait for Forensics, Guv. But as I don’t keep SOCO officers in my wardrobe, I think you’re going to have to explain.”
“Not that easy my little Deputy Dawg. You're so hot on ‘procedure’, why don’t you show me how to follow a lead properly.”
“Gene. I’ve just got out of the shower and I’m dripping wet. Besides, I don’t have any pockets for evidence bags.”
“I can think of somewhere you can store them…”
“Oi!”
“Use yer instinct Tyler. It’ll do you good for a change. What does yer gut tell you?”
”It tells me that looking at little piles of Jap Desserts is making me hungry.”
”Mmmmm. Glad to hear it. And what else is it saying?”
“To find the bag that they came from and see if there are any left.”
“Now you’re talking. Get on with it then Dorothy. We haven’t got all day...what if the evidence trail goes cold?”
“I don’t think pick ‘n’ mix is particularly heated in the first place, but whatever you say. Let me just dry off…”
“I wouldn’t bother. What if you missed a vital piece of the case whilst fannying around with yer scented talc? A ‘pivotal point’ of the investigation, as it were?”
“Um..Guv? What are you doing out there?”
“Me? Oh nothing Sammy-boy. Just waiting for you. You know, making myself comfortable. Now, are you coming out of the bathroom, or am I going to have to phone the ruddy Famous Five to solve the mystery of the empty sweet shop?”
“No, I’m coming out, but I don’t really get… Oh. Ah. Right. Guv? Did you know that you have a trail of Fizzy Fish up one leg?”
”'I'm not blind Tyler.”
“No. And a line of Flying Saucers up the other?”
“Neither am I stupid.”
“Hmm. You’re wearing a candy necklace.”
“Pastels are my colours.”
“I see. You do look strangely attractive.”
”As always.”
“Mmmmm. And lickable.”
“Par for the course.”
”And I am hungry.”
”I thought you were following your instincts.”
“Oh I am. Mmmm….yum…mmmmm.... Gene?”
”What now, Delia?”
”Is that a Sherbet Dipdab on your…?”
”Certainly is Sammy-lad. And you'll never guess where I’ve sprinkled the Space Dust. Better still; see if you and yer legendary detective skills can find it. It is tingly on the tongue y'know…”
Author: norfolkdumpling
Pairing: Sam/Gene
Rating: Green Cortina for suggestion.
Word Count: 419
Disclaimer: Neither characters or sweeties are remotely mine. Wish they were though. I'm sure they all taste great ;)
Warning: Very silly. May cause repeated trips to the corner shop.
Notes: I'm sorry about this. It's inspired by
fawsley's Kitchen Sink Science and the comments thereafter. (Also written for her to help ward off the evil shingles). I've never written fic before, and you're about to find out why, but this disturbing idea just got stuck in my head. So apologies all round, and the family packs of Cola Bottles are on me as compensation.
Ten Penny Mix
“Guv? Why are there sweets on my bathroom floor?”
“Dunno. You’re the ace detective Gladys. Why don’t you investigate them.”
“Huh?”
“What do we do when we see a piece of evidence on the ground Tyler?”
“Wait for Forensics, Guv. But as I don’t keep SOCO officers in my wardrobe, I think you’re going to have to explain.”
“Not that easy my little Deputy Dawg. You're so hot on ‘procedure’, why don’t you show me how to follow a lead properly.”
“Gene. I’ve just got out of the shower and I’m dripping wet. Besides, I don’t have any pockets for evidence bags.”
“I can think of somewhere you can store them…”
“Oi!”
“Use yer instinct Tyler. It’ll do you good for a change. What does yer gut tell you?”
”It tells me that looking at little piles of Jap Desserts is making me hungry.”
”Mmmmm. Glad to hear it. And what else is it saying?”
“To find the bag that they came from and see if there are any left.”
“Now you’re talking. Get on with it then Dorothy. We haven’t got all day...what if the evidence trail goes cold?”
“I don’t think pick ‘n’ mix is particularly heated in the first place, but whatever you say. Let me just dry off…”
“I wouldn’t bother. What if you missed a vital piece of the case whilst fannying around with yer scented talc? A ‘pivotal point’ of the investigation, as it were?”
“Um..Guv? What are you doing out there?”
“Me? Oh nothing Sammy-boy. Just waiting for you. You know, making myself comfortable. Now, are you coming out of the bathroom, or am I going to have to phone the ruddy Famous Five to solve the mystery of the empty sweet shop?”
“No, I’m coming out, but I don’t really get… Oh. Ah. Right. Guv? Did you know that you have a trail of Fizzy Fish up one leg?”
”'I'm not blind Tyler.”
“No. And a line of Flying Saucers up the other?”
“Neither am I stupid.”
“Hmm. You’re wearing a candy necklace.”
“Pastels are my colours.”
“I see. You do look strangely attractive.”
”As always.”
“Mmmmm. And lickable.”
“Par for the course.”
”And I am hungry.”
”I thought you were following your instincts.”
“Oh I am. Mmmm….yum…mmmmm.... Gene?”
”What now, Delia?”
”Is that a Sherbet Dipdab on your…?”
”Certainly is Sammy-lad. And you'll never guess where I’ve sprinkled the Space Dust. Better still; see if you and yer legendary detective skills can find it. It is tingly on the tongue y'know…”