Fuck.
Last night, in the early morning, while inducing nose bleeds on myself because I was so fucking goddamned depressed, I found a stray cat outside. It was disgusting-just how I like all my pets. I knew we were meant to be together when it used my face as a scratching post. I love pain. So, to return the favor, I smashed the cat's head against the brick walls of my house, soaked it and its fur in gasoline and took a blow torch to its tail. I accidentally, well, kind of, not really, killed it.
The neighbors called the cops on me thinking that I was setting off fireworks a day early. Fuck that. Fuck them. Fuck the faggot cops. I would never celebrate a holiday of joy.
Anyway, when the cops arrived I was in my garage cutting the skin in between my toes, which they rudely interrupted, so I took the 7 inch blade I was using and stuck it right up the officer's ass. Faggot.
To my surprise, he actually liked it and joined me in the garage for some cutting and lemon juice action. He raped me in the ass with his dick covered in the cat's blood after we dropped some acid and watched Silence of the Lambs.
I HATE HATE HATE to fucking say it, but this was one of my favorite holidays ever.
Fuck You.
The neighbors called the cops on me thinking that I was setting off fireworks a day early. Fuck that. Fuck them. Fuck the faggot cops. I would never celebrate a holiday of joy.
Anyway, when the cops arrived I was in my garage cutting the skin in between my toes, which they rudely interrupted, so I took the 7 inch blade I was using and stuck it right up the officer's ass. Faggot.
To my surprise, he actually liked it and joined me in the garage for some cutting and lemon juice action. He raped me in the ass with his dick covered in the cat's blood after we dropped some acid and watched Silence of the Lambs.
I HATE HATE HATE to fucking say it, but this was one of my favorite holidays ever.
Fuck You.