There Won't Be Much For Me In The Afterlife
[Death was not something that Vince Noir had ever given all that much thought to...]Death was not something that Vince Noir had ever given all that much thought to. It seemed, to him, to be an abstract concept more than anything serious and inevitable. Despite all their mad adventures, he had always felt entirely safe and untouchable. Death was something that could be avoided, with a little Shaman aid and a healthy dose of double-
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But oh my GOD. Now we know what happened to Howard and why Vince is on this desperate errand, and after watching Vince's insistence that Naboo MUST save Howard and hearing Vince's heartfelt promise to Howard to make it right and never be a bother to him again, if he'll just come back (especially his admittance that "there ain't no me if you aren't around, not really"), that just makes Howard's reaction and rejection of Vince so, so, so crushing. No wonder Vince can't muster the words to explain why Howard should choose him; he's totally gutted, especially because he's been laying his heart and his life on the line for Howard. It's his worst nightmare: being told that Howard would rather have this life because Vince doesn't mean enough to him, that their life together isn't enough to compel him to come back, or even to trust what Vince is telling him. Because Vince was so sure that if he just explained it to Howard, then of course he'd understand...
But Howard doesn't understand, because he isn't ready to break out of the protections yet, and he's looking for reasons to reinforce his belief in the realness of the illusion. Except, of course, until he falls asleep (and probably finds himself back in the corridor). I can't help but wonder where he'll find himself next, and what, if anything, will carry over. It's probably going to be torture for Vince to try it again after this, but he has to keep on trying anyway, right? Right? Except he's running out of time, too, and risking them both being lost with every attempt...
~whimpers~ Remind me that there's a happy ending, okay?
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