久しぶり。
It has been a hot minute since I last posted in here. There's a lot of reasons for it - busy with real life, job taking over most of my waking hours and moving into an analogue journal because it makes for a more calming activity. I locked so many entries because real life people managed to find this journal and I'm not ready for them to find out the amount of crazy buried beneath the calm surface.
First off - Arashi went on hiatus at the beginning of the year. Honestly, 2020 was exhausting, not only because of a pandemic raging outside, but also all the fangirling things I've been trying to catch up on. It reminded me why I stepped away fron LJ in 2014 - it became a bit tiring trying to stay up to date with everything happening and it started feeling like an obligation than something I did for fun.
2020 whooshed by in a flash. But as the mental toll of covering the pandemic (and all other f*cked up things happening around the world) became too much, I turned once again to the sparkling world of idols for refuge from the real world. I started enjoying it again. I caught up on quite a few things while on lockdown (which lasted about 2 months over here?) and discovered new favourites.
Which brings me to a second point.
I did not expect to start loving another JE group. I thought Arashi was it. Idols weren't my thing, I told myself.
I swallowed those words when I finally admitted to myself that I liked Sexy Zone in late October last year. SEXY ZONE. Whose name I ribbed at for YEARS. Guess that's karma for you - because I went from "eh they're okay, I guess" to spending hundreds on their latest concert merch.
I haven't loved a group like this since Arashi in 2011. I was initially looking at King & Prince - and while I loved their songs, it just wasn't on the same level as Sexy Zone.
I joined their fanclub in January,just TWO MONTHS after seeing my first concert DVD. How insane is that???
I have a bad feeling I'm here for the long haul. My wallet is weeping.
That said, I'm glad for the distraction they provide, especially with Arashi on break.
I know there are people (healthcare workers for example) who are having a worse time, but I really could NOT express how exhausted my mind is with all these bad news. Day in and out, I see almost nothing but conflict, infection numbers and death tolls. Most people have the option of turning away from the news but unfortunately, it's what my job entails. I have to soldier through all of it, even though it gets branded on my brain long after my shift is over.
But at least I have the distraction of variety shows to watch, right?
Oh, speaking of that... I started formally taking Japanese last year too. It's good to finally understand stuff after years of guessing and repeating. I'm not exactly a stellar student, but I'm doing well enough to pass.
I'm really grateful for those classes though, they keep me from overthinking things.
How can I, when my mind is running wild trying to remember all the conjugations?
Well, that's what's been happening.
Will I write more here? Maybe. At the moment, I'm happily sharing things on my journals. My paper journals. They make for prettier photos.
First off - Arashi went on hiatus at the beginning of the year. Honestly, 2020 was exhausting, not only because of a pandemic raging outside, but also all the fangirling things I've been trying to catch up on. It reminded me why I stepped away fron LJ in 2014 - it became a bit tiring trying to stay up to date with everything happening and it started feeling like an obligation than something I did for fun.
2020 whooshed by in a flash. But as the mental toll of covering the pandemic (and all other f*cked up things happening around the world) became too much, I turned once again to the sparkling world of idols for refuge from the real world. I started enjoying it again. I caught up on quite a few things while on lockdown (which lasted about 2 months over here?) and discovered new favourites.
Which brings me to a second point.
I did not expect to start loving another JE group. I thought Arashi was it. Idols weren't my thing, I told myself.
I swallowed those words when I finally admitted to myself that I liked Sexy Zone in late October last year. SEXY ZONE. Whose name I ribbed at for YEARS. Guess that's karma for you - because I went from "eh they're okay, I guess" to spending hundreds on their latest concert merch.
I haven't loved a group like this since Arashi in 2011. I was initially looking at King & Prince - and while I loved their songs, it just wasn't on the same level as Sexy Zone.
I joined their fanclub in January,just TWO MONTHS after seeing my first concert DVD. How insane is that???
I have a bad feeling I'm here for the long haul. My wallet is weeping.
That said, I'm glad for the distraction they provide, especially with Arashi on break.
I know there are people (healthcare workers for example) who are having a worse time, but I really could NOT express how exhausted my mind is with all these bad news. Day in and out, I see almost nothing but conflict, infection numbers and death tolls. Most people have the option of turning away from the news but unfortunately, it's what my job entails. I have to soldier through all of it, even though it gets branded on my brain long after my shift is over.
But at least I have the distraction of variety shows to watch, right?
Oh, speaking of that... I started formally taking Japanese last year too. It's good to finally understand stuff after years of guessing and repeating. I'm not exactly a stellar student, but I'm doing well enough to pass.
I'm really grateful for those classes though, they keep me from overthinking things.
How can I, when my mind is running wild trying to remember all the conjugations?
Well, that's what's been happening.
Will I write more here? Maybe. At the moment, I'm happily sharing things on my journals. My paper journals. They make for prettier photos.