How much is that doggy in the window?
I was having a pretty bad day yesterday. So I called upon my friend Andrew to tell me a funny story to make me laugh. So yesterday, he was my knight in shining armor (of words). Here’s what I got from him.
You see, there was once this wee little doggy.. by the name of Captain WienerSchnitzelbank. Naturally, with a name like Captain WienerSchnitzelbank, you would know for certain, that this dog was a Siberian Husky / French Poodle Cross. Now, while a lovable dog… Captain WienerSchnitzelbank wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. Far from it. Half the time, Captain WienerSchnitzelbank didn't remember that he was a dog. Most of the time, he thought he was a cat. A 250 lb Cat with curly hair.
So anyway… Captain WienerSchnitzelbank the Dog / Cat was walking along one day...deciding that today was the day that he would let the other
Cats in the neighbourhood know he was around. Being incredibly brilliant, he decided that the best way to accomplish this was to steal all their litterboxes, and bring them over to his house. That way, they could all meet together at once, and it would be a big party. After all… Cats don't mind when people rearrange their lives do they? No! ot at all.
The first house proved easy to get into, since the humans conveniently left the door open. Quite proud of this, Captain WienerSchnitzelbank absconded rather quickly with the litter box. First he had to empty the contents onto the floor, since it was all ucky and stuff. Right inconvenient. And then he had to go, so he used the litter strewn out on the floor, and did his business. All better now, and Captain
WienerSchnitzelbank was ready for action.
The next house proved more difficult, as the humans obviously didn't get the memo that he was coming today. Didn't they see the presents he had been leaving on their lawn as a reminder, every day for the last week? The presents were gone.. so somebody got the memo. Oh well. Thankfully, Captain WienerSchnitzelbank was an ingenious dog, having scoped out this place before. He surmised that running headlong into the bay window should allow him access to the house, as long as it was at full speed. See, the birds didn't go fast enough... which is why they couldn't get in.
Captain WienerSchnitzelbank took a running start and jumped into the air. Then everything went dark. Then it was light again. Something didn't seem right... this wasn't the house he was looking for… and where was the litterbox? And why is there that strange human with the cloth over his mouth? This is all very confusing. But, never one to think before acting, Captain WienerSchnitzelbank jumped up, and started running. There was all this noise, and humans shouting. It was so chaotic, that Captain WienerSchnitzelbank decided to leave another memo, just clearing things up. After that, well.. he had some litter boxes to collect.
As he meandered around this strange place, he noticed some odd-shaped litter boxes. And all these humans in dresses with holes in the back. But, since he was on a quest for litterboxes, and he knew that only Cats used litterboxes, well... he might as well add these ones to his collection. Grabbing this funny shaped steel litterbox, he left for the door.
It took a little longer to find his way home, and Captain WienerSchnitzelbank was sure he took a couple wrong turns, but he managed to make it home. But home was a little different. There were a lot of angry humans, and a lot of his fellow cats seemed out of sorts.
Captain WienerSchnitzelbank Decided that maybe now he should pretend to be a dog, since the humans who feed him seem to like that. So he dropped off the strange litterbox at his Human's feet, and wagged his tail. Didn't seem to work tho, as they were still mad. Ah well. Must be mad at the dog, since we all know... Cats can never do anything wrong.
You see, there was once this wee little doggy.. by the name of Captain WienerSchnitzelbank. Naturally, with a name like Captain WienerSchnitzelbank, you would know for certain, that this dog was a Siberian Husky / French Poodle Cross. Now, while a lovable dog… Captain WienerSchnitzelbank wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. Far from it. Half the time, Captain WienerSchnitzelbank didn't remember that he was a dog. Most of the time, he thought he was a cat. A 250 lb Cat with curly hair.
So anyway… Captain WienerSchnitzelbank the Dog / Cat was walking along one day...deciding that today was the day that he would let the other
Cats in the neighbourhood know he was around. Being incredibly brilliant, he decided that the best way to accomplish this was to steal all their litterboxes, and bring them over to his house. That way, they could all meet together at once, and it would be a big party. After all… Cats don't mind when people rearrange their lives do they? No! ot at all.
The first house proved easy to get into, since the humans conveniently left the door open. Quite proud of this, Captain WienerSchnitzelbank absconded rather quickly with the litter box. First he had to empty the contents onto the floor, since it was all ucky and stuff. Right inconvenient. And then he had to go, so he used the litter strewn out on the floor, and did his business. All better now, and Captain
WienerSchnitzelbank was ready for action.
The next house proved more difficult, as the humans obviously didn't get the memo that he was coming today. Didn't they see the presents he had been leaving on their lawn as a reminder, every day for the last week? The presents were gone.. so somebody got the memo. Oh well. Thankfully, Captain WienerSchnitzelbank was an ingenious dog, having scoped out this place before. He surmised that running headlong into the bay window should allow him access to the house, as long as it was at full speed. See, the birds didn't go fast enough... which is why they couldn't get in.
Captain WienerSchnitzelbank took a running start and jumped into the air. Then everything went dark. Then it was light again. Something didn't seem right... this wasn't the house he was looking for… and where was the litterbox? And why is there that strange human with the cloth over his mouth? This is all very confusing. But, never one to think before acting, Captain WienerSchnitzelbank jumped up, and started running. There was all this noise, and humans shouting. It was so chaotic, that Captain WienerSchnitzelbank decided to leave another memo, just clearing things up. After that, well.. he had some litter boxes to collect.
As he meandered around this strange place, he noticed some odd-shaped litter boxes. And all these humans in dresses with holes in the back. But, since he was on a quest for litterboxes, and he knew that only Cats used litterboxes, well... he might as well add these ones to his collection. Grabbing this funny shaped steel litterbox, he left for the door.
It took a little longer to find his way home, and Captain WienerSchnitzelbank was sure he took a couple wrong turns, but he managed to make it home. But home was a little different. There were a lot of angry humans, and a lot of his fellow cats seemed out of sorts.
Captain WienerSchnitzelbank Decided that maybe now he should pretend to be a dog, since the humans who feed him seem to like that. So he dropped off the strange litterbox at his Human's feet, and wagged his tail. Didn't seem to work tho, as they were still mad. Ah well. Must be mad at the dog, since we all know... Cats can never do anything wrong.