(no subject)
He's single again. I feel like a traitor to myself, that that fact makes me a bit happy. He mentioned it casually. He also mentioned an ex, in San Diego, who wanted him to come over. I... it shouldn't have bothered me, but it did. I want to get over him so badly. Every time I see him, even just a picture, I want to kiss him, I want him to hold me... Why the hell is this proving so difficult? I didn't have problems like this getting over my other ex's... Once I set my mind to it, it was done. they were out, ya know? But I've set my mind to this so many times that if I'd been using fingers and toes to keep track I'd be considered a freak. So why can't I do this? Why the hell can't I get over him?? He doesn't deserve me. Getting back with him would be disasterous. I know all this; my logic knows it, my heart knows it, every fiber of my being knows it. I don't get back with him, I don't ask him back, out of self preservation.
So why the hell can't I just get over him? I want to date someone new, I want to go out and find a relationship with a man who deserves me, but I almost feel like I can't do that until I'm over Kevin.
Guh.
So why the hell can't I just get over him? I want to date someone new, I want to go out and find a relationship with a man who deserves me, but I almost feel like I can't do that until I'm over Kevin.
Guh.