Mere 2.2
When we last left off Shelby had just given birth to the first baby of generation three, a boy named Lucian.
Shelby fed him his first bottle. A good sign. Maybe she'll suprise me by being a great mom after all.
Or... maybe she just has devious plans.
Shelby: You wait here, kay? Mommy has some important business to attend to.
*sigh* So much for Shelby suprising anyone.
Shelby: Yes, I shall play as this legacy burns! BURNS!
Oh Sindele, once again you are the only reasonable person around.
Urgh... Yes... thank you, Sindele. I didn't buy you a changing table or anything.
Oh well. Still the best parent in the house by a longshot.
Shelby: Welcome home from work, champ! There's a suprise for you upstairs.
Liam: This isn't like the last suprise, is it? Because my eyebrows just grew back.
Shelby: HAHAHA! I forgot about that!
Liam: Yeah, I'm not going upstairs.
Well what have we here!
Shelby: Drink up, Luci dear. :D
Shelby: Become a strong soldier for mommy. >)
Shelby, you are all sorts of disturbing.
Shelby: Well THAT is enough of THAT. This parenting thing is a little too involved.
True to her word, this is the last time she touched him until I forced her to take him to his cake. As a toddler.
Liam: Who's my favorite wiife!
Shelby: Teehee!
Lucian: *shivers*
Shelby: Man we are awesome parents. We should make an educational film about this. *makes frame with hands for the 5738957875th time*
Shelby: Hm? What about my nose?
Liam: D: N...nothing.
Liam: I have this nagging feeling I'm forgetting something.
Liam: Ugh, this is really vexing.
Liam: What could it possible be?
Liam: Welp, I'm stumped. Time for bed.
Omg. *marries Sindele* Why didn't you pass any sense along to your son?
Sindele: *continues to be awesome*
Korey: Omigod... Liam, don't move.
Korey: There's a giant scroll over your head.
Liam: Oh god... I think... I think I feel it!
Liam: This is YOUR doing, isn't it?
Shelby: *chews* hm?
Korey: How low won't you sink, vile woman?
Shelby: I don't know what you two idiots are talking about, but this question pleases me to a great extent.
Finally acknowledging your baby, I see.
Liam: *feeds Lucian. Smoulderingly.*
NOOO A BURGLAR. Wait, I know that sinister gaze. It's just Shelby off to her preferred line of work.
Hurray! Birthday time already.
Up, up, AND AWAYYY!
Lucian: *explodes into... Maddy's boyfriend from college?*
There we go. So far so good, I think. I didn't notice Shelby's eyes were so slanted until they were staring me in the face here on Lucian.
Liam: PEEKABOOOOO!
Lucian: OH GOD I WASNT READY!
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Best grandpa ever.
It's UNPOSSIBLE to tell in this picture, but Lucian has Korey's lip shape 100%.
So out of curiosity I gave them a karaoke machine. And suprise suprise, who goes straight for it?
....Omg. That was the most hardcore thing I've ever seen. *Makes Korey real and marries him*
Korey: *does all the parenting*
NO WAI. Lucian was potty trained in ONE try without ANY smart milk? HE'S A GENIUS, I SAY!
Lucian: *is cute!*
Ready for some severe Lucian spam?
Must.. not.. play favorites.
Don't any of you wear clothes before you handle these kids? x.x
I'm already sick of the word pop.
This was so painful. Liam's really good at this but Shelby's voice is something out of the blackest of nightmares.
Shelby: *refuses to be shown up*
Shelby: *howls*
Liam: *takes opportunity to oggle boobs*
Showoff. x)
WOOHOO! That's 100,000 earned and perma-platinum!
Is that two dust rings I spy? I have heard tales of what this means. Also, why do you always pop here?!
Liam: Ughhh, birthday time again already?
I'm afraid so.
I'm suprised you remember him, Shelby. You haven't seen him since INFANCY.
Wow. He looks pretty interesting. I think he could either be a really gorgeous teen, or an alien. We shall see.
Faithful to those who actually raised him, Lucian heads straight for grandma and grandpa.
Korey: WOOO! I won at rock, paper, scissors!!! BOW BEFORE ME, WORM!
Lucian: Why must you hurt me in this way, grandfather?
Lucian and Sindele: Koreyyyy... *worshipping stares*
I'm glad Lucian at least has his grandparents. His parents, sadly, have more important things to think about.
Smustling already? Obviously you know the way into my heart.
Wtf, how are you immediately good at everything? XD
Where were you 5 seconds ago? Lucian was smustling all alone.
Ah well. *enjoys*
Another LTW filled! I'm on a roll here.
NOW IS NOT THE TIME.
O. M. G. It's a boy, Kieran, with Korey's grey eyes!!!! Aughhh! Why did they skip a generation on me? Unfortunately he has the SAME OLD black hair and dark skin, which means he most likely won't be heir.
TWINS! Another boy, Jasper, with dark hair, Shelby's skin, and Liam's green eyes.
Blatant favoritism much?
Shelby: Oh, hey. It's you. Hugs?
Lucian: No no no no no. No thanks, lady.
Shelby: Lady? Kid, I'm your mother.
Lucian: NO, THAT'S NOT TRUE. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE. *runs away in tears*
Korey: WHAT THE HELL DID YOU TELL HIM THAT FOR?
Lucian: *WEEP*
Lucian: *jams self into emo corner*
Shelby: Fine, whatever. This baby is way better anyway.
Shelby: Hey, wait a minute! I just remembered you're not allowed to yell at me like that!
Korey: *zones out*
Shelby: ACCEPT ME AS YOUR QUEEN, CRETIN, OR FACE ERASURE.
Korey: Hmmm, nope, no. But here's an idea.
Korey: You... shut the fuck up!
Shelby: *grumbles* This is all Lucian's fault. I hate that kid.
Sindele: *attaches to Korey's face*
Spurned in her efforts to control the household, Shelby once again returns to torment the fish.
Liam: I don't see what's so great about this.
Liam: Well, no, this is actually kind of fun.
Butler: Imbeciles.
No one, and I mean no one, loves the ballet bar as much as Lucian does.
Wha? What's up?
NOOO, I'M NOT READY FOR THISSSS!!!
WHYYYY
WHYYYY *sobs* WHYYY ...did your hair turn brown? And why did you shave off your eyebrows, Sindele? *sniff*
Still foxy!
That's some amazing skin cream you use, Korey.
Shelby: Oh, this is just too good to be true.
Shelby: Who's prettiest now, BITCH?
Korey: Even my shriveled ass is sexier than yours, whore.
Sindele: Korey? Is that you, dear? *reaches around vaguely*
Still exactly the same.
*headdesk*
NOOOO!! Not the purely useless and only for decoration wine cabinet!!!
Sindele: I'm hooome! Come and love me and praise me and hrmmmphfffshdsf!
Even though I will most likely go nuts from there being too many people in one house, I had them both retire.
CLIFFHANGER ENDING! I am sure you will be wringing your hands until the next installment.