Instead of looking up next week's objectives like a MATURE, RESPONSIBLE ADULT would . . .
I'm going to tell you how I completely BOMBED today . . .
As if it wasn't bad enough that the first lesson I teach occurred on the day my supervisor showed up. But I also had to FORGET MY LESSON PLANS on my table this morning. Who the fuck does that? I thought my lesson went terribly, mostly because I had nothing to reference and was completely going by memory, but my co-op said it went very well. I don't know why, but okay . . . And my supervisor sent me his comments through email, and I think the weirdest one was "I saw you smile a couple times! :)" I was really confused, and then I realized, Oh, I don't think I'd ever smiled in his Instructional Design class at all last year. Except that time Josh discovered he could make a really cool sproingy noise with the spring under our table, and then everyone else in the class tried it. Ha! :D
I'm just so disgusted with how immature and unprofessional I can be. The thing that I really hate to think about is the fact that this is the real thing, and my failure is really going to screw up the kids. :(
I wonder if my supervisor knows I don't really want to be a teacher. I wonder if he knows I've only made it to this point because of sheer luck.
I wonder why people tell me I'm doing a great job when I'm not. :P
As if it wasn't bad enough that the first lesson I teach occurred on the day my supervisor showed up. But I also had to FORGET MY LESSON PLANS on my table this morning. Who the fuck does that? I thought my lesson went terribly, mostly because I had nothing to reference and was completely going by memory, but my co-op said it went very well. I don't know why, but okay . . . And my supervisor sent me his comments through email, and I think the weirdest one was "I saw you smile a couple times! :)" I was really confused, and then I realized, Oh, I don't think I'd ever smiled in his Instructional Design class at all last year. Except that time Josh discovered he could make a really cool sproingy noise with the spring under our table, and then everyone else in the class tried it. Ha! :D
I'm just so disgusted with how immature and unprofessional I can be. The thing that I really hate to think about is the fact that this is the real thing, and my failure is really going to screw up the kids. :(
I wonder if my supervisor knows I don't really want to be a teacher. I wonder if he knows I've only made it to this point because of sheer luck.
I wonder why people tell me I'm doing a great job when I'm not. :P