stressed out, sleep deprived, cranky, and frustrated...
stressed out... Midterms dragged on for 3 weeks this semester. Plus, it's by far been the most difficult semester at PCOM yet. Next semester is supposed to be a lot worse... I also stress about the future a little bit. Acupuncture is very saturated in SD. I'm not sure if I'll be able to have a successful practice, here and I hate to think that some day I might have to move out to the middle of nowhere... But I remain hopeful that won't be the case.
sleep deprived... My sleep schedule has been terrible. Basically, I've become so used to going to bed around 2am that when I have to get up early, I just don't get enough sleep. I think I've been averaging 6 hours or so for weeks now. The other night I got about 2 and a half... It was hot and humid enough that I only kind of half-slept and tossed and turned until about 4:30am, when I finally woke up enough to realize I hadn't really slept at all at night. Ugh, tired.
Frustrated... Primarily because of the leg. This is the third time I've had to rehab it. I'm so sick of walking with pain and struggling to regain weight and rebuild muscle. I'm so tired of not being able to exercise and do all the things I love doing that make such a big difference in my daily life. I still do push-ups and situps, but it's so boring and not nearly enough... I can still feel the fracture in my leg and the gap is considerable. The x-ray really didn't look great. They actually had to rebreak my leg in 3 places in order to get the rotation right... I permanently have lost the ability to flex the distal most joint on my big toe... Just really frustrated.
I'm also frustrated because I feel so isolated from everyone. All my friends seem busy. Worse than that, there's been this run for the past 3 or 4 weeks where people just don't get back to me. Did I do something wrong? It makes me hyper focus on the fact that my health has been less than 100% "If only I was less tired and less out of it all the time, people would be more excited to talk to and hang out with me, conversations would be more engaging, we'd connect better..."
Cranky... See: all of the above
All in all, life's not terrible, though. I finally finished midterms... For better or worse I think a girl in my massage class has (has had) a crush on me. I'm probably moving in with my old roommate Aaron, soon. He bought a nice house in Clairemont Mesa (1850 sq. ft., 4 bedroom, 2 bath, pool and jacuzzi) and he needs a roommate to help make his mortgage more affordable. He's asking less then I pay in rent and utilities right now, too, so it's a super awesome deal.
And finally, a rant about Sony... A lot could be said about Sony and their total lack of proper communication with fans about the status of their PS3. They often randomly change the format of the system around so it does or doesn't do certain key things. Then they'll randomly release batches of systems that alter those same variables, but no one knows when they're coming, they sell out within a couple hours, and they're gone again. This happened recently with the metal gear solid 4 bundle. Konami released a special run of MGS4 with the old 80gb version of the PS3, updated with some new features, but retaining the backwards compatibility of the old 80gb PS3's. None of the current PS3's are backwards compatible. They all sold out in a couple hours, so I ordered the bundle from Konami. I paid $600 for it, $50 more than how much the 80gb PS3 normally costs. When it arrives, it's a 40gb PS3 with the game and a custom "limited edition" engraving on the side of the case. Needless to say, I'm sending it back and I'm a little pissed off that I got ripped off. Sony, get your shit together!! Make your changes and your news clear and easy to find! Fuck your constant obscurity! Ok, /rant
sleep deprived... My sleep schedule has been terrible. Basically, I've become so used to going to bed around 2am that when I have to get up early, I just don't get enough sleep. I think I've been averaging 6 hours or so for weeks now. The other night I got about 2 and a half... It was hot and humid enough that I only kind of half-slept and tossed and turned until about 4:30am, when I finally woke up enough to realize I hadn't really slept at all at night. Ugh, tired.
Frustrated... Primarily because of the leg. This is the third time I've had to rehab it. I'm so sick of walking with pain and struggling to regain weight and rebuild muscle. I'm so tired of not being able to exercise and do all the things I love doing that make such a big difference in my daily life. I still do push-ups and situps, but it's so boring and not nearly enough... I can still feel the fracture in my leg and the gap is considerable. The x-ray really didn't look great. They actually had to rebreak my leg in 3 places in order to get the rotation right... I permanently have lost the ability to flex the distal most joint on my big toe... Just really frustrated.
I'm also frustrated because I feel so isolated from everyone. All my friends seem busy. Worse than that, there's been this run for the past 3 or 4 weeks where people just don't get back to me. Did I do something wrong? It makes me hyper focus on the fact that my health has been less than 100% "If only I was less tired and less out of it all the time, people would be more excited to talk to and hang out with me, conversations would be more engaging, we'd connect better..."
Cranky... See: all of the above
All in all, life's not terrible, though. I finally finished midterms... For better or worse I think a girl in my massage class has (has had) a crush on me. I'm probably moving in with my old roommate Aaron, soon. He bought a nice house in Clairemont Mesa (1850 sq. ft., 4 bedroom, 2 bath, pool and jacuzzi) and he needs a roommate to help make his mortgage more affordable. He's asking less then I pay in rent and utilities right now, too, so it's a super awesome deal.
And finally, a rant about Sony... A lot could be said about Sony and their total lack of proper communication with fans about the status of their PS3. They often randomly change the format of the system around so it does or doesn't do certain key things. Then they'll randomly release batches of systems that alter those same variables, but no one knows when they're coming, they sell out within a couple hours, and they're gone again. This happened recently with the metal gear solid 4 bundle. Konami released a special run of MGS4 with the old 80gb version of the PS3, updated with some new features, but retaining the backwards compatibility of the old 80gb PS3's. None of the current PS3's are backwards compatible. They all sold out in a couple hours, so I ordered the bundle from Konami. I paid $600 for it, $50 more than how much the 80gb PS3 normally costs. When it arrives, it's a 40gb PS3 with the game and a custom "limited edition" engraving on the side of the case. Needless to say, I'm sending it back and I'm a little pissed off that I got ripped off. Sony, get your shit together!! Make your changes and your news clear and easy to find! Fuck your constant obscurity! Ok, /rant