(no subject)
i am exhausted. and emotional. and having a rough day.
today at work, this girl was really upset. so i stood by her and talked while i folded all day long. it turns out that her boyfriend is a bad guy, and they broke up and she was all in tears about it. here's some stuff that's happened to her during and after the relationship: he keyed her car, strangled her, slept with all of her friends, tells her when/how/who she can hang out with, do, etc., makes people in the small town she lives in choose between him and her - they usually choose him since he supplies the town's weed - calls her an f****** b**** all the time, and she's lost her gymnastics scholorship over him too. but she really misses him. okay, so she asked me what she should do, and i told her some stuff about my life, and my past, and the things that have happened to me in relationships, and she and i were really doing well. then, this guy showed up, and one of the most personal things i told her, she threw in my face. i was really hurt and upset by that, because i told her in confidence to encourage her. so anyway - i stormed into where she was (about 30 minutes later) and told her that i forgave her whether she was going to apologize or not - but i wanted to know why - all she kept saying was 'i'm sorry' like a beaten dog. it was really sad in a way - but she cut me so deep with what she said...i don't know.
on top of that, we got a new manager in the store that i don't really care for. she's there on a 6 month contract, so i better start liking her lickity split. she's just never managed a store and has no idea what she's doing. that makes it hard. especially when she's so bitingly critical.
i then got into a small argument with one of the most stuck-up girls that works there - which i promptly apologized for. before i left the store, i was crying. it's just so much lately - with losing the house, not having a "real" job, the manager musical chairs, and living in a house that isn't mine - not to mention everything with my sister, with craig's sister, and with having virtually no friends my age that i can go out with - i'm just in such a funk. so i pretty much bawled in my car - which needs so much in the way of repairs it's rediculous. i'm overwhelmed with my life, and with everything going on. i'm constantly feeling close to a breakdown, all the while dealing with sorting out the cynicism i've recently come into with faith, God, the Spirit, and my beliefs - not just on here, but in real life too. it makes me exhausted emotionally.
but, i was able to eat at paradise bakery today - again - and it was truly wonderful. i had a soup (that wasn't great) but the sandwhich was enough to make my mouth water all over again. it's their turkey cranberry but on 9 grain wheat - omg! it's AMAZING!
apparently colorado is headed for a major storm - more major than the blizzard several years back even. i hope the cows don't all die. that's a huge market for them. my friends are farmers there, and it's not a good thing. i'm sure they're all taken care of though.
anyway - i'm pretty tired, so i'm going to go to bed. i love you all.
today at work, this girl was really upset. so i stood by her and talked while i folded all day long. it turns out that her boyfriend is a bad guy, and they broke up and she was all in tears about it. here's some stuff that's happened to her during and after the relationship: he keyed her car, strangled her, slept with all of her friends, tells her when/how/who she can hang out with, do, etc., makes people in the small town she lives in choose between him and her - they usually choose him since he supplies the town's weed - calls her an f****** b**** all the time, and she's lost her gymnastics scholorship over him too. but she really misses him. okay, so she asked me what she should do, and i told her some stuff about my life, and my past, and the things that have happened to me in relationships, and she and i were really doing well. then, this guy showed up, and one of the most personal things i told her, she threw in my face. i was really hurt and upset by that, because i told her in confidence to encourage her. so anyway - i stormed into where she was (about 30 minutes later) and told her that i forgave her whether she was going to apologize or not - but i wanted to know why - all she kept saying was 'i'm sorry' like a beaten dog. it was really sad in a way - but she cut me so deep with what she said...i don't know.
on top of that, we got a new manager in the store that i don't really care for. she's there on a 6 month contract, so i better start liking her lickity split. she's just never managed a store and has no idea what she's doing. that makes it hard. especially when she's so bitingly critical.
i then got into a small argument with one of the most stuck-up girls that works there - which i promptly apologized for. before i left the store, i was crying. it's just so much lately - with losing the house, not having a "real" job, the manager musical chairs, and living in a house that isn't mine - not to mention everything with my sister, with craig's sister, and with having virtually no friends my age that i can go out with - i'm just in such a funk. so i pretty much bawled in my car - which needs so much in the way of repairs it's rediculous. i'm overwhelmed with my life, and with everything going on. i'm constantly feeling close to a breakdown, all the while dealing with sorting out the cynicism i've recently come into with faith, God, the Spirit, and my beliefs - not just on here, but in real life too. it makes me exhausted emotionally.
but, i was able to eat at paradise bakery today - again - and it was truly wonderful. i had a soup (that wasn't great) but the sandwhich was enough to make my mouth water all over again. it's their turkey cranberry but on 9 grain wheat - omg! it's AMAZING!
apparently colorado is headed for a major storm - more major than the blizzard several years back even. i hope the cows don't all die. that's a huge market for them. my friends are farmers there, and it's not a good thing. i'm sure they're all taken care of though.
anyway - i'm pretty tired, so i'm going to go to bed. i love you all.