do dah do dah
so now it is that last day of classes. the last week of being here in fayetteville. last week of living on my own. last week of being 100% free and openly gay in my home and immediate surroundings. Soooo many feelings
well classes come to an end as of friday. i feel like i let my self down. my educational career was not at its peek, due to my own lack of dedication and procrastination........graduation is not at hand . i have to complete a semester of summer school before holding that sheep skin. ( who gives a fuck anymore) i ask my self . then this screaming voices say "i do!!!!!" ............oh boy "I do!!!!!!"
Sat morning i am moving back in to my parents house. i moved to Fayetteville for college. i left dorm life after my sophomore year to a student apartment living( that was a adventure all its own) and was in my own apt. for the last 2 yrs. u know the regular ....pay my own bills have visitors when, where and "how" i feel. now that is all comming to an end . My parents built a house about 2 hrs away from my university and i am going there to reside un till grad school( about 8-12 months). i cannot waite to reduce bill payment from almost $800 a month to a voluntary $300 a month. My "studsband" is acting like the world is comming to and end and i guess to a point( a small ass point) it is. no more kitchen fucks or bathroom interludes. No more being just "us" in a place that just "mine". i am still very numb about that!
i am so eager to begin a new chapter in life though. so i am doing the regular...........Job search......new social scene search and new me search( physical appearance, views on life and all around new soul search!)
well classes come to an end as of friday. i feel like i let my self down. my educational career was not at its peek, due to my own lack of dedication and procrastination........graduation is not at hand . i have to complete a semester of summer school before holding that sheep skin. ( who gives a fuck anymore) i ask my self . then this screaming voices say "i do!!!!!" ............oh boy "I do!!!!!!"
Sat morning i am moving back in to my parents house. i moved to Fayetteville for college. i left dorm life after my sophomore year to a student apartment living( that was a adventure all its own) and was in my own apt. for the last 2 yrs. u know the regular ....pay my own bills have visitors when, where and "how" i feel. now that is all comming to an end . My parents built a house about 2 hrs away from my university and i am going there to reside un till grad school( about 8-12 months). i cannot waite to reduce bill payment from almost $800 a month to a voluntary $300 a month. My "studsband" is acting like the world is comming to and end and i guess to a point( a small ass point) it is. no more kitchen fucks or bathroom interludes. No more being just "us" in a place that just "mine". i am still very numb about that!
i am so eager to begin a new chapter in life though. so i am doing the regular...........Job search......new social scene search and new me search( physical appearance, views on life and all around new soul search!)