on checking privilege

[libellum]

LJ has had some great writing lately on confronting one's own privilege, particularly in the context of conversation or debate. Here's two that I've bookmarked:

Don't be That Guy by synecdochic, writing in the aftermath of the Open Source Boob Project
Being an ally part 1: listening to anger by sophiaserpentia

The comments on the latter are particularly worthwhile. This,

Comments

[forthwritten]

I suppose this is an issue I'm still grappling with. As a British-Asian, queer, female it would be easy to play a lot of cards. If my sight wasn't corrected by glasses I would be counted as partially sighted and I still remember the utter frustration of being called slow just because my body didn't work as I wanted it to.

However, focusing on the ways in which I am a minority doesn't ask me to interrogate how I am privileged - I am privileged in terms of the class I present as, even if I feel I'm outside class. I am Asian, so people usually assume I'm intelligent, motivated and diligent rather than a troublemaker. My ethnicity has actually helped me find work - the team I work in now is made up of a Mexican, a Greek and an American. I was raised Catholic, which has its own set of discriminations which I experience differently than if I was Hindu or Sikh.
Of course there are things I find unfair, but I've received much more hassle from my delayed bone growth and poor eyesight than I ever have for my colour.

Of course it's important to assess whether protesting "I'm not like that!" is helpful, but I should be assessing this too. It's not helpful for me to not listen to people who've had very different experiences from me, even if we have similar backgrounds.

[sammhain]

Speaking only for myself I feel that the most effective way to demonstrate "I'm not like that" is to not act like that, and being a white male part of that for me, that includes accepting it is not always for me to be dominating, dictating, or driving a discussion or a debate.

I think the last bit really hits the nail on the head, the willingness to listen and listen fully rather than plotting what we want to say next while others speak.