migraine
I slept at my brothers apartment last night. I'm sure everyone threw a damned fit when I wasn't online, but yeah. I do have a phone, and important people or people with news pertaining to important things can call it. I'm gonna go grab a really hot shower and try to stop thinking before I figure out how I plan on talking to Jayk tonight. to be honest I'm not sure what to say. The truth? Yeah, " I have no idea what the fuck we are, and to be honest I'm enough of a skank that constant hallway pda, snuggling, and make-outs still haven't cleared it up for me, and you know what? I don't think that as much as I like you and you like me makes you ready to deal with it because I'm sick of pissie high school immature bullshit relationships", and you know what. Thats the truth put kindly. Dammit, I like him. I do, but waiting to figure out what the hell he wants from this isn't something I'm big on. Fuck. Now I know how Paul felt with my pissing around for almost a month on indecision. Damn this is irritating. I never thought I'd be able to understand what he said the last day we argued about "us". " I like you but-" yadda yadda yadda about waiting,liking her too, and not thinking I really wanted to make it work. Yeah god I never realized how much being with Paul relationship wise pissed me off while I was actually with him. I was so whipped to that relationship though I would have never noticed how pissed I was. I dunno. I'm not sure if I can let that happen to Jayky and I. He's been so amazing to me. More then a lot of people ever have had the balls to be without asking anything from me at all.