Next Part of the R/J/K saga! Worked on during Fic Chat!
So I promised I would have this out by this weekend,and I did my best to keep that promise. Here's the next installment, unedited, so please forgive any mistakes. I have a question for people. I was thinking of having an interaction between Keiko's father and Jadeite in the next bit, do you guys want to see that? Or would you rather I just went into the Rei/J conversation? Anyways, Keiko makes a cameo in this part, her role is somewhat downgraded but maybe I'll write something just for her in the future. I hope everyone likes it!
There was a chill in the air, but she chose to ignore it as she became aware of a familiar presence behind her. Without moving, she stated, “You followed me.”
There was a momentary hesitation before he answered. “What are we doing here?”
The calmness of his question didn’t detract from the rising panic in her at the thought of him being here. “You followed me,” she forced out, ruthlessly pushing it down, “What the hell are you doing here?”
The tightness in his voice betrayed his frustration. “I’m trying to understand you, firebird. I’m trying to help us.”
They way in which he said “us” sent her mind spinning back to what it was like when she was with him. Something she couldn’t afford to be thinking about. Not now. “What us?” she scoffed, hiding her pain behind false bravado, “We broke up yesterday.”
She turned away, afraid that her face would give away her lie.
“I never agreed to that,” he told her, coming around the bench to sit beside her, “We had an argument, fine, whatever. It’s not something to break up over. You can’t just take off when you don’t want to talk to me.”
His nearness and fervent tone sparked something that had lain dormant in her for a long time. A feeling that she wasn’t sure she wanted to examine.
“Don’t flatter yourself,” she said dismissively, lacking her usual bite.
He didn’t rise to the dig and for a long moment, she feared that she had successfully driven a wedge between them. Relief flooded her when he finally spoke. “What are you doing here?”
The desperation in his voice chipped at the wall she had built around her heart. “If you’re not avoiding me then what is it? Why won’t you let me in?”
Staring across the way at the carefree scene of children running around a playground, she tried to deny that she knew the reasons for shutting him out. She gathered her pain close to her heart but even then, pieces of him kept sneaking through. An oppressive silence settled over them like a shroud; a stark contrast to the picturesque day.
Sorting through her conflicting emotions, she came to a decision.
“I want to,” she said tentatively, “I want to,” she repeated, “But...If you knew, if you saw...”
Hope filled her when he took her hands, forcing her to meet his eyes. “I’ll still love you,” the sincerity of his words left her humbled, “We can’t change the past. Whatever came before, I can handle it. It’s part of who you are.”
She studied his face, trying to sear the image of his expression to memory. “Wait here for a bit,” she asked, “Please. Then we’ll talk.”
At his nod, it felt as though a burden had been lifted from her. Her heart felt lighter than it had been in years. Rising, she scooped up the package that sat beside her and went to face her other source of pain and joy.
Taking a deep breath, she pasted on an expression of false cheer before wading into the swarm of children surrounding the festive picnic area. “Rei!” the older woman supervising the party said, “I was beginning to worry that you wouldn’t make it.”
Both she and the man with her engulfed her in a hug. “As if I would miss this,” Rei replied, “Right kiddo?”
Leaning down, she gave the young girl beside her a tight embrace, missing the look that passed between the couple. “Happy Birthday Keiko.”
She handed her the brightly wrapped present with a fond smile. “Come on squirt,” the man prompted, “Let’s go put that with the others and let your Mom and Rei-chan catch up for a bit.”
“Okay Daddy,” Keiko replied, bouncing in place, “But then Rei-chan has to play with me and watch me open my presents.”
“I think that can be arranged,” he said, giving the two women an exaggerated wink as he led Keiko off.
“She’s gotten so big,” Rei said softly, “And she looks so happy Miya.”
Miya regarded her for a long moment before answering. “She’s like a ball of sunshine,” she said fondly, “But how about you? How are you doing Rei? Are you happy?”
Rei’s eyes flicked back in the direction she had come from. She froze as she realized that he no longer sat alone. Two blonde heads were bent together in close conversation, the resemblance between them sending her mind whirling with “what-ifs”. Her heart constricted at the sight and she was suddenly finding it harder to breathe. Her vision was on the verge of blurring when a hand on her arm snapped her back to the present.
“Rei?”
“I...I...”she gasped out, wrapping her arms around her waist, “I don’t know.”
A warm arm came around her shoulders. “Oh Rei, he’s not...is he?”
She shook her head fiercely, “No. We’ve only been...together...for a few months.”
“And you brought him here? I’m surprised, you’ve never brought anyone with you before; not even your grandfather.”
“He followed me here,” Rei responded, seeming to speak more to herself than to Miya.
“I didn’t even notice until he approached me. I can’t believe I didn’t notice.”
“Are you angry that he followed you?” Miya asked.
“I thought I was,” she paused, searching for more words, “But a part of me felt relief and another part panicked.”
Miya looked back at the pair on the bench. “They seem to be getting along well,” she commented.
“He’s...he’s an amazing man,” Rei finally said.
“But?”
“But, he’s wonderful and understanding and every day I feel myself relying on him more and more and that scares me.”
“That’s a part of loving someone, sweetie,” Miya offered, giving her shoulder a squeeze.
“I can’t love him,” Rei said desperately, “I don’t have any love left to offer. Every time I love someone, they leave me. Mother, Father, Kaidou and...”
Miya’s eyes widened at the third name. This was the first time Rei had ever referred to him by name in front of her. Not noticing her slip, Rei continued on. “When I’m with him, I can almost forget. But I can’t, I don’t deserve to.”
Sympathy welled up in Miya’s heart as she was reminded of just how young Rei was. Too young to have dealt with what life had given her. “You can’t live in the past Rei, not when the future is offering so much. Look at Keiko. What else is she but the promise of a bright tomorrow?”
“But what if he leaves me?” Rei asked, her tone fearful.
“Then you start over again,” Miya replied, “It’s all you can do. Nothing is guaranteed in life. When I married Raku neither of us thought that we’d have difficulties becoming parents. It was heartbreaking when we found out and it nearly broke us up. You’re strong Rei. I know you’re strong, you can get past this.”
“What if he doesn’t love me?”
“He followed you here. He didn’t leave. He’s waiting for you. He’s almost there if not already. You just need to give him a chance. Take a leap of faith. That’s what we did and look where we are now.”
Rei gave her a tiny smile. “I knew the second I saw you that I had made the right choice.”
“No regrets?”
“Some,” she admitted, “But never about choosing you and Raku.”
Miya released her from her embrace, “Come on, let’s get you some cake then see about opening those presents.”
Standing, the two women returned to the festivities, joined by a small girl who happily grasped both of their hands and chatted away about her visit with her new “friend”.
There was a chill in the air, but she chose to ignore it as she became aware of a familiar presence behind her. Without moving, she stated, “You followed me.”
There was a momentary hesitation before he answered. “What are we doing here?”
The calmness of his question didn’t detract from the rising panic in her at the thought of him being here. “You followed me,” she forced out, ruthlessly pushing it down, “What the hell are you doing here?”
The tightness in his voice betrayed his frustration. “I’m trying to understand you, firebird. I’m trying to help us.”
They way in which he said “us” sent her mind spinning back to what it was like when she was with him. Something she couldn’t afford to be thinking about. Not now. “What us?” she scoffed, hiding her pain behind false bravado, “We broke up yesterday.”
She turned away, afraid that her face would give away her lie.
“I never agreed to that,” he told her, coming around the bench to sit beside her, “We had an argument, fine, whatever. It’s not something to break up over. You can’t just take off when you don’t want to talk to me.”
His nearness and fervent tone sparked something that had lain dormant in her for a long time. A feeling that she wasn’t sure she wanted to examine.
“Don’t flatter yourself,” she said dismissively, lacking her usual bite.
He didn’t rise to the dig and for a long moment, she feared that she had successfully driven a wedge between them. Relief flooded her when he finally spoke. “What are you doing here?”
The desperation in his voice chipped at the wall she had built around her heart. “If you’re not avoiding me then what is it? Why won’t you let me in?”
Staring across the way at the carefree scene of children running around a playground, she tried to deny that she knew the reasons for shutting him out. She gathered her pain close to her heart but even then, pieces of him kept sneaking through. An oppressive silence settled over them like a shroud; a stark contrast to the picturesque day.
Sorting through her conflicting emotions, she came to a decision.
“I want to,” she said tentatively, “I want to,” she repeated, “But...If you knew, if you saw...”
Hope filled her when he took her hands, forcing her to meet his eyes. “I’ll still love you,” the sincerity of his words left her humbled, “We can’t change the past. Whatever came before, I can handle it. It’s part of who you are.”
She studied his face, trying to sear the image of his expression to memory. “Wait here for a bit,” she asked, “Please. Then we’ll talk.”
At his nod, it felt as though a burden had been lifted from her. Her heart felt lighter than it had been in years. Rising, she scooped up the package that sat beside her and went to face her other source of pain and joy.
Taking a deep breath, she pasted on an expression of false cheer before wading into the swarm of children surrounding the festive picnic area. “Rei!” the older woman supervising the party said, “I was beginning to worry that you wouldn’t make it.”
Both she and the man with her engulfed her in a hug. “As if I would miss this,” Rei replied, “Right kiddo?”
Leaning down, she gave the young girl beside her a tight embrace, missing the look that passed between the couple. “Happy Birthday Keiko.”
She handed her the brightly wrapped present with a fond smile. “Come on squirt,” the man prompted, “Let’s go put that with the others and let your Mom and Rei-chan catch up for a bit.”
“Okay Daddy,” Keiko replied, bouncing in place, “But then Rei-chan has to play with me and watch me open my presents.”
“I think that can be arranged,” he said, giving the two women an exaggerated wink as he led Keiko off.
“She’s gotten so big,” Rei said softly, “And she looks so happy Miya.”
Miya regarded her for a long moment before answering. “She’s like a ball of sunshine,” she said fondly, “But how about you? How are you doing Rei? Are you happy?”
Rei’s eyes flicked back in the direction she had come from. She froze as she realized that he no longer sat alone. Two blonde heads were bent together in close conversation, the resemblance between them sending her mind whirling with “what-ifs”. Her heart constricted at the sight and she was suddenly finding it harder to breathe. Her vision was on the verge of blurring when a hand on her arm snapped her back to the present.
“Rei?”
“I...I...”she gasped out, wrapping her arms around her waist, “I don’t know.”
A warm arm came around her shoulders. “Oh Rei, he’s not...is he?”
She shook her head fiercely, “No. We’ve only been...together...for a few months.”
“And you brought him here? I’m surprised, you’ve never brought anyone with you before; not even your grandfather.”
“He followed me here,” Rei responded, seeming to speak more to herself than to Miya.
“I didn’t even notice until he approached me. I can’t believe I didn’t notice.”
“Are you angry that he followed you?” Miya asked.
“I thought I was,” she paused, searching for more words, “But a part of me felt relief and another part panicked.”
Miya looked back at the pair on the bench. “They seem to be getting along well,” she commented.
“He’s...he’s an amazing man,” Rei finally said.
“But?”
“But, he’s wonderful and understanding and every day I feel myself relying on him more and more and that scares me.”
“That’s a part of loving someone, sweetie,” Miya offered, giving her shoulder a squeeze.
“I can’t love him,” Rei said desperately, “I don’t have any love left to offer. Every time I love someone, they leave me. Mother, Father, Kaidou and...”
Miya’s eyes widened at the third name. This was the first time Rei had ever referred to him by name in front of her. Not noticing her slip, Rei continued on. “When I’m with him, I can almost forget. But I can’t, I don’t deserve to.”
Sympathy welled up in Miya’s heart as she was reminded of just how young Rei was. Too young to have dealt with what life had given her. “You can’t live in the past Rei, not when the future is offering so much. Look at Keiko. What else is she but the promise of a bright tomorrow?”
“But what if he leaves me?” Rei asked, her tone fearful.
“Then you start over again,” Miya replied, “It’s all you can do. Nothing is guaranteed in life. When I married Raku neither of us thought that we’d have difficulties becoming parents. It was heartbreaking when we found out and it nearly broke us up. You’re strong Rei. I know you’re strong, you can get past this.”
“What if he doesn’t love me?”
“He followed you here. He didn’t leave. He’s waiting for you. He’s almost there if not already. You just need to give him a chance. Take a leap of faith. That’s what we did and look where we are now.”
Rei gave her a tiny smile. “I knew the second I saw you that I had made the right choice.”
“No regrets?”
“Some,” she admitted, “But never about choosing you and Raku.”
Miya released her from her embrace, “Come on, let’s get you some cake then see about opening those presents.”
Standing, the two women returned to the festivities, joined by a small girl who happily grasped both of their hands and chatted away about her visit with her new “friend”.