A few minutes for me...
I am so tired.
My head feels squishy like silly-putty. My back aches. And I am literally fantasizing about going to bed the way that some fantasize about sex.
Who knew that talking and spinning records on the radio would be so exhausting, right? Well, my day consists of a bit more than that. I'm not digging ditches, it's true. But the hours and hours of work that goes into those daily four hours has me feeling seriously worn out today. Plus, I've had to deal with more than a couple idiots over the past two days. It's amazing to me how many incompetants are collecting paychecks while so many smart people are unemployed.
I'll stop complaining there, because I'm concentrating right now on winding down and finding some inner peace. I'm enjoying a little spring sunshine beaming through the window, while "Oprah" plays on the television and the cats snooze in the other room.
Shane is in Wales right now. As much as I miss him, I've grown to cherish the time that I have all to myself. Yes, it can get brutally lonely here when I'm on my own. But it is also downright delicious to have enormous chunks of time during which I don't have to speak outloud, or consult with anyone about what to eat for dinner, or hear someone gripe "pick your socks off the floor." :)
It's funny. In a weird way, I think I needed to be in this long-distance relationship in order to fully grow up. Before Shane, I lived at home with my family. I left their house and all of their needs and demands to live with my now-ex Mike. In fairly short order, I became his partner-mama-housekeeper-chef-papa. That lasted nine years, with an additional five as post-split roomies. It wasn't until I moved out to be with Shane that I learned how to take care of myself and only myself during those months that we're apart.
I hated it those periods of seperation, at first, and not simply because I missed Shane. I mostly didn't know how to function as a solo person. It was so weird. I couldn't sleep. And I would actually call Shane in Wales to ask if he minded if I did this or that. It took a while, but I have really grown to appreciate being in charge of me and nothing else... even if I'm not always good at it. I like it. It's sort of the way I imagined it would be when I was a teenager, desperate to get out of my parents' house.
So, yeah, I'm tired. I'm going to try to hit the sack early, even though it's still quite bright and sunny outside. I'm hoping that a little extra snooze-time will give me the patiencde to not cut a bitch tomorrow. Hehehe... And if it doesn't, oh well...
Man, I love being back on LJ! xox
My head feels squishy like silly-putty. My back aches. And I am literally fantasizing about going to bed the way that some fantasize about sex.
Who knew that talking and spinning records on the radio would be so exhausting, right? Well, my day consists of a bit more than that. I'm not digging ditches, it's true. But the hours and hours of work that goes into those daily four hours has me feeling seriously worn out today. Plus, I've had to deal with more than a couple idiots over the past two days. It's amazing to me how many incompetants are collecting paychecks while so many smart people are unemployed.
I'll stop complaining there, because I'm concentrating right now on winding down and finding some inner peace. I'm enjoying a little spring sunshine beaming through the window, while "Oprah" plays on the television and the cats snooze in the other room.
Shane is in Wales right now. As much as I miss him, I've grown to cherish the time that I have all to myself. Yes, it can get brutally lonely here when I'm on my own. But it is also downright delicious to have enormous chunks of time during which I don't have to speak outloud, or consult with anyone about what to eat for dinner, or hear someone gripe "pick your socks off the floor." :)
It's funny. In a weird way, I think I needed to be in this long-distance relationship in order to fully grow up. Before Shane, I lived at home with my family. I left their house and all of their needs and demands to live with my now-ex Mike. In fairly short order, I became his partner-mama-housekeeper-chef-papa. That lasted nine years, with an additional five as post-split roomies. It wasn't until I moved out to be with Shane that I learned how to take care of myself and only myself during those months that we're apart.
I hated it those periods of seperation, at first, and not simply because I missed Shane. I mostly didn't know how to function as a solo person. It was so weird. I couldn't sleep. And I would actually call Shane in Wales to ask if he minded if I did this or that. It took a while, but I have really grown to appreciate being in charge of me and nothing else... even if I'm not always good at it. I like it. It's sort of the way I imagined it would be when I was a teenager, desperate to get out of my parents' house.
So, yeah, I'm tired. I'm going to try to hit the sack early, even though it's still quite bright and sunny outside. I'm hoping that a little extra snooze-time will give me the patiencde to not cut a bitch tomorrow. Hehehe... And if it doesn't, oh well...
Man, I love being back on LJ! xox