Long time, no write
I realize it's been over a year since I've written in this thing. It's very apparent by the fact that the posting page is completely different from the last time I saw it. It's weird because I still use LJ every day, but basically only for reading communities now. I rarely ever post anything, but I do comment once in a blue moon. I know a lot of my friends on here have stopped posting here as well and have moved on to other social networking sites, and only a handful of people I actually consider "friends" are still here. For those who are still around, I do read your entries, but am often too lazy to comment.
I could do another "catch-up" post that gives a quick look at what's been going on in the past year, but honestly, I don't see the point. Let's just say that my life is kind of a mess right now, but I'm trying to take steps to make it better (which is one reason I'm writing here now). I've been out of work since April, but I am supposed to start a new job at Comcast within the next week. I moved back in with my mom about a month and a half ago, and there's been a bunch of family drama since then. It's a highly dysfunctional and sometimes emotionally abusive environment, but I'm kinda stuck right now. My birthday came and went this past week, and so far 27 is sucking ass. I'm lonely, depressed, and just want to feel important to SOMEONE, somewhere. I feel invisible to the people who should care about me the most, and I hate it.
I'm not really sure what to do with this journal. When I started it, it was a regular journal where I wrote about my private thoughts and daily activities. That somewhere along the way, it became mostly fandom-related things and very little actual personal content. Then I tried to balance the two, and then I just stopped trying. I don't want to delete it, or start a new one, but I also can't say that I will write in here very much going forward, either. I might, but I can't guarantee it. I intend to do a massive friends cut, and only keep the handful of people who I feel I made a real connection with over the years. Now, some people have changed usernames and I have a terrible time trying to remember what the original ones were, so if I cut you and you know we were close, please let me know as it may have been an accident.
So basically I made this post to say I haven't left LJ, I do still read other people's entries. but I'm not sure how much I'll be actually posting here myself. I suppose if there's something I really want/need to post about, I will. Otherwise, it would probably just be a lot of me whining, and nobody wants that.
I could do another "catch-up" post that gives a quick look at what's been going on in the past year, but honestly, I don't see the point. Let's just say that my life is kind of a mess right now, but I'm trying to take steps to make it better (which is one reason I'm writing here now). I've been out of work since April, but I am supposed to start a new job at Comcast within the next week. I moved back in with my mom about a month and a half ago, and there's been a bunch of family drama since then. It's a highly dysfunctional and sometimes emotionally abusive environment, but I'm kinda stuck right now. My birthday came and went this past week, and so far 27 is sucking ass. I'm lonely, depressed, and just want to feel important to SOMEONE, somewhere. I feel invisible to the people who should care about me the most, and I hate it.
I'm not really sure what to do with this journal. When I started it, it was a regular journal where I wrote about my private thoughts and daily activities. That somewhere along the way, it became mostly fandom-related things and very little actual personal content. Then I tried to balance the two, and then I just stopped trying. I don't want to delete it, or start a new one, but I also can't say that I will write in here very much going forward, either. I might, but I can't guarantee it. I intend to do a massive friends cut, and only keep the handful of people who I feel I made a real connection with over the years. Now, some people have changed usernames and I have a terrible time trying to remember what the original ones were, so if I cut you and you know we were close, please let me know as it may have been an accident.
So basically I made this post to say I haven't left LJ, I do still read other people's entries. but I'm not sure how much I'll be actually posting here myself. I suppose if there's something I really want/need to post about, I will. Otherwise, it would probably just be a lot of me whining, and nobody wants that.