(no subject)
So today was good
I am feeling much better
Feelings are emerging and i think its good that they are. Although that happened before and it didnt turn out so well. But if i focus more on it than its okay because it just is. I know that a bad reason but thats okay too. I am not going into detail about who the feelings pertain to because im not sure and i dont want everyone knowing what is going on and if i do something about it, it will be on my own time and not because i have to rush because everyone knows. i dont want anything serious after what just happened and i want someone for just right now and if it takes me awhile for finding someone for jsut right now than that is fine. im not in any hurry.
I have decided that I am going to Newport, well im 95% positive anyways. I am making my decision partially out of anger and i am waiting for my anger to subside before i completely make my decision. I think that is a great opportunity to go there and to get away from everyone for a bit. I can meet new people and become more of me than what everyone else wants. i can grow as a person and mix it up a bit. Also i get paid very well and have my own car(better than mine now) its right down the street from the ocean. i would love to spend time with my baby cousins and my aunt and uncle. Karen is my godmother and i love spending time with her and i never get to spend much time with her because she lives on the east coast. they know people and so i can make friends. i dont have much time left to get and experience things. once college comes than i cant go and do that. i can go snorkling and kayaking and get to try new things that i normally wouldnt try at home. People already see me as something here and i can be whoever i want to be, i can figure out who i am without everyones constant pressure of who they are use to me being. it will be good for me and of course i will miss people like crazy but we are all going to have to leave each other sometime and im coming back in six weeks from when i leave, its not like it is forever and i wont have any communication. i plan on getting a lap top and web cam and all the jazz. I am just worried if im going out with someone that i will have to break it off or have long distance when i go. i dont want anything serious so i would probably just break it off unless we both didnt want to.
Kelli and I are leaving macomb friday night and it will be amazing. We are actually going out and we get to see steven jay. so that is even better. i get to get all caffenated and be stress free. i love the sound of this and where it could go.
I am feeling much better
Feelings are emerging and i think its good that they are. Although that happened before and it didnt turn out so well. But if i focus more on it than its okay because it just is. I know that a bad reason but thats okay too. I am not going into detail about who the feelings pertain to because im not sure and i dont want everyone knowing what is going on and if i do something about it, it will be on my own time and not because i have to rush because everyone knows. i dont want anything serious after what just happened and i want someone for just right now and if it takes me awhile for finding someone for jsut right now than that is fine. im not in any hurry.
I have decided that I am going to Newport, well im 95% positive anyways. I am making my decision partially out of anger and i am waiting for my anger to subside before i completely make my decision. I think that is a great opportunity to go there and to get away from everyone for a bit. I can meet new people and become more of me than what everyone else wants. i can grow as a person and mix it up a bit. Also i get paid very well and have my own car(better than mine now) its right down the street from the ocean. i would love to spend time with my baby cousins and my aunt and uncle. Karen is my godmother and i love spending time with her and i never get to spend much time with her because she lives on the east coast. they know people and so i can make friends. i dont have much time left to get and experience things. once college comes than i cant go and do that. i can go snorkling and kayaking and get to try new things that i normally wouldnt try at home. People already see me as something here and i can be whoever i want to be, i can figure out who i am without everyones constant pressure of who they are use to me being. it will be good for me and of course i will miss people like crazy but we are all going to have to leave each other sometime and im coming back in six weeks from when i leave, its not like it is forever and i wont have any communication. i plan on getting a lap top and web cam and all the jazz. I am just worried if im going out with someone that i will have to break it off or have long distance when i go. i dont want anything serious so i would probably just break it off unless we both didnt want to.
Kelli and I are leaving macomb friday night and it will be amazing. We are actually going out and we get to see steven jay. so that is even better. i get to get all caffenated and be stress free. i love the sound of this and where it could go.