Vigilante 25/?
Chapter Twenty-Five
Olivia lay awake well into the night, going over and over what Sloane had said in the car. Humiliate herself in front of Casey and the guys? How on earth was she going to do that, what the hell should she do to accomplish it, and what if it didn’t work? What if Casey just laughed and still wouldn’t speak to her or even look at her? And, why would embarrassing herself make Casey want her back? Sloane’s logic was baffling, even to a detective as good as Olivia. It was like… two wrongs don’t make a right, so why would this help? And what sort of embarrassing thing should she do? She knew one thing, though, for sure - she wouldn’t be able to sleep until she had at least tried. Fucking great. Maybe she’d do something on Friday, so that if it backfired she’d at least have the weekend to hide away from the world.
“Hey,” came a voice from the doorway, and Olivia looked over to see Sloane standing there looking at her.
“Hey yourself. What are you doing up?”
“Woke up, couldn’t get back to sleep. Can I sleep in here with you?”
“Sure,” Liv said, pulling back the covers so the teenager could climb under.
Sloane scrambled into the bed and snuggled up to Olivia. “I…” she began to say, but then cut herself off and shook her head. “Nevermind.”
“What is it, hon?” Olivia asked, giving her an affectionate squeeze. “You can tell me, whatever it is.”
“I don’t want ACS to find me a foster family,” Sloane whispered in a rare moment of insecurity.
Olivia held her breath, letting it out very slowly and sighing in defeat. “I don’t either,” she finally admitted, wondering what the hell she was trying to do to herself. But it was true… she didn’t like the thought of Sloane leaving her custody. They were good for each other, Sloane was making so much progress academically, she wasn’t hooking anymore, she was respectful and honest… and they had formed a pretty solid bond over the past week or so.
“You-you don’t?” Sloane breathed out, raising her wide eyes to Olivia’s.
“I don’t,” Olivia repeated, shaking her head. “I must be crazy,” she then teased, poking Sloane in the ribs, “but I think I want to be stuck with ya.”
Sloane tried to smile at the teasing, but she was so overwhelmed with so many feelings that she just started crying, burying her face in Olivia’s neck. “You’re the only person in my life that’s ever cared,” she said, her voice belying a mixture of sadness and gratitude. “I know it’s only been like a week, but you’re the best mom I could ever dream of. It-it feels like you’re my mom, I can’t help it.”
“Hey, don’t cry,” Olivia said gently, rubbing Sloane’s back, trying to comfort her. “It feels like that to me too, honey. And I didn’t think I’d ever want kids… but we just seem to fit, don’t we?”
Sloane nodded, clinging tightly to Olivia. “I’m sorry… I didn’t ever want to tell you this. I don’t want to make you feel obligated to me, because you’re not. When they find me a family, I promise not to make you feel bad about it, okay?”
“Sloane, sweetheart, were you listening?” Olivia asked with a soft smile. “I think you’re gonna end up stuck with me. Let’s talk more about it tomorrow, okay? Just get some sleep.”
Sloane wanted to believe Olivia’s words, but she’d been let down plenty of times before, and didn’t want to let it happen again. So until there was no turning back and she was legally Olivia’s daughter, she would not let herself believe it was going to happen at all. Self-preservation was what kept her alive and kicking, and she couldn’t afford to give that up just yet. So she just nodded and closed her eyes, trying to fall back asleep.
--
By Friday, Olivia and Sloane had talked three more times about the future, and Olivia was going to talk to a friend of hers in the family court circuit on Monday morning. Now, she had dropped Sloane off at school, and was sitting on her bed at home, late for work, running over her plan of action on the Casey front over and over again. If she didn’t suck it up and do it today, she’d never do it, and not only would Sloane club her over the head with a baseball bat, but she’d do the same to herself. Casey was worth pretty much anything. She could do this.
Twenty minutes later she was dressed to the nines in a short black vinyl skirt, a very sexy and revealing black lace thong, and a halter top very similar to the one she’d dressed Casey in last Friday night. She put on some make-up, then took a deep breath and buckled the diamond-studded collar around her neck, the leash in her jacket pocket which she put on over the skimpy outfit. A pair of high-heeled black boots completed the ensemble and she made sure that Ilyanna’s kitty paddle was in her other jacket pocket before she walked outside and hailed a cab.
--
“What the fuck?” Fin asked when Olivia walked through the doors. “You crazy, Liv? You lucky Dad’s not home or you’d be gettin’ a new asshole.”
“I thought undercover week was over,” Munch piped in, a shit-eating grin on his face as he slid his arms crossed over his chest.
Elliot just raised one eyebrow and said nothing. He knew Olivia well enough to know she must have a specific intention coming to work dressed like that.
Olivia ignored Munch and Fin and moved over to Elliot as she took the leash out of her pocket and clipped it to the collar. “I need you to get Liz and Casey over here as soon as possible, El.”
Elliot regarded her curiously, his hand on the phone. “How am I supposed to do that?”
“Come on El, please? Say you need to go over testimony or something. And don’t say I’m here.”
“If I get fired for this, Olivia? You’re gonna have to explain it to my wife. Deal?”
Liv grinned and nodded. She knew he’d help her out. “Deal.” She took off her jacket, draping it over her desk chair, and waited.
--
Ten minutes later, Liz and Casey walked through the doors, and both stopped short when they saw Olivia. Neither knew what to say or do, and Casey glared daggers at Elliot before turning to leave.
“Casey wait!” Olivia called desperately.
Casey only stopped at the sound of Olivia dropping to her knees. Her entire body trembled as she slowly turned around, not sure she even wanted to hear what Olivia had to say. But she did recognize the risk Liv was taking by coming here dressed like that, and as she stared hard at the detective, she noticed the collar and leash and her breath caught in her throat, sending a pulse of tight pleasure between her legs despite her internal protests.
Liv sighed with relief and immediately launched into a heartfelt speech. “I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am, Casey,” she began, her rich brown eyes conveying her feelings even as she expressed them with words as well. “I had no right to do what I did, and if I could take it back, there’s no question whether I would or not. I never, ever meant to hurt or embarrass you, I swear that. I just wasn’t thinking… and I am so, so sorry. I’ve barely slept since last Friday, trying to figure out how my ego managed to get so big… and the only thing I could come up with was the fact that I was so proud to have you by my side that I couldn’t see past that to anything else. I-“ she fought the urge to look around before making her last confession, but she managed to keep her eyes focused only on the ADA. “I love you with all my heart, Casey. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before in my life. You’re so… God Casey you’re perfect, and I don’t know why you fell for me but I know I don’t deserve you. I know I betrayed you, betrayed your trust, and I’ll do anything in the world to make it up to you. I love you, I’m head over heels, completely in love and it scares me to death. Please forgive me… I want to spend the rest of my life making you happy.” She took a deep breath, fighting the tears that threatened to overwhelm her, and reached a shaky hand over to her jacket, drawing out the paddle and holding it out to Casey along with the handle of the leash. “Please, Case, make it even.”
Casey stood in complete shock, absolutely fucking amazed at both Olivia’s words and at the fact that she had managed to stay standing through the heartfelt confession. Her own eyes teared up and she fought back a sob, wanting nothing more than to forgive the detective, take her in her arms and kiss her until they both couldn’t breathe. She found her anger dissipating, but not entirely, and she stared at Olivia for a long few moments before saying quietly, “I’m not going to sink to your level, Detective.”
Liz Donnelly perked up, stepping in for a few reasons. “Oh I am,” she said smugly, holding out her hand to Casey. “Give me that thing, Novak.”
Now that Casey could get behind. Her eyes danced with mischief as she reached out to take the items from Olivia and hand them over to Liz. If Liz actually went through with this, it might just even the score. Casey was not about to beat Olivia right here right now - after all, her complaint had been that she didn’t want to mix business with pleasure, and it would certainly be a pleasure to take a paddle to Olivia’s backside. There was no way in hell. But watching Liz do it… that was a whole other story.
Olivia’s eyes widened and she looked pleadingly up at Casey, silently begging her not to hand her off to Liz. When Casey just licked her lips and grinned, Olivia knew she was fucking doomed.
“Up,” Liz said sharply, tugging upward on the leash, forcing Olivia to get to her feet if she didn’t want to choke.
Olivia struggled to stand and move along with Liz toward Elliot’s desk. “Hey, come on now-“ she started to protest when she saw Elliot’s cocky expression, but Liz interrupted her.
“Shut up, Detective,” she said, pulling jerkily down on the leash, bending Olivia over the desk. “Elliot. Find another seat, unless you want to miss the show.”
Elliot didn’t have to be asked twice, he got up and made his way to Liv’s desk, sinking down into her chair and folding his arms behind his head.
Olivia’s cheeks had never been more red than they felt at that moment, and she briefly debated telling Liz where she could shove it, then getting up and leaving. But this was what Casey had felt like, and if this was what it would take to even the score, then she’d suck it up.
Liz grinned and gave Casey a wink, who had followed Elliot over to Liv’s desk and taken a seat on its edge. The EADA then turned back to Olivia and lifted her skirt up, smirking devilishly at the lacy black thong she wore. “Nice panties, Detective,” she drawled. “They aren’t going to offer you much protection. By the time I’m through with you you’re going to wish you’d never walked in here today. And you’re going to be crying like a baby.”
Olivia just pulled her lips into a tight line and refused to acknowledge Ms. Donnelly. She wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction of a reaction. This was for Casey, and no one else.
Liz just laughed, smacking Olivia a few times with her hand before she hefted the paddle with a sadistic grin, preparing to strike the stoic detective.
“What the fuck is happening to my squad, people?”
All eyes snapped around to see Cragen in the doorway.
“Do we work here, or not? Are we practicing a new form of rehabilitation? Olivia, you seem to be the guinea pig these days."
“Don?” Liz asked, giving him a saucy smile.
“What?” Cragen answered irritably.
“You’re just in time. Have a seat.” She indicated an empty chair beside Munch’s desk with a nod of her head.
Cragen opened his mouth to respond, and then gave up the fight and just shook his head as he sat down. “You’re the boss.”
Christ! Olivia thought she was going to die. Why, why, *why* did Cragen of all people have to show up just then?!
Liz patted Olivia on the back of her head, then readied herself again and brought the paddle down repeatedly, with hard, quick strokes, not letting Olivia recover between them before she’d land another, striping the detective’s gorgeous ass with fiery red lines before ten seconds had even passed.
Olivia was not prepared for the skillful assault, and she gasped, biting down on her forearm to keep from making more noise than that. Dear God, that hurt. Liz was obviously a player in the game, because the paddling she was getting was excrutiatingly painful yet not out of control. Liz knew exactly what she was doing. She could feel the flames erupting across her ass and thighs, and she was acutely aware of her captive audience looking on. She couldn’t see them, but she was intuitive enough to know that they were all hard up. Probably even Casey. Hell, probably *especially* Casey.
Liz was enjoying herself a great deal, giving Olivia what she deserved. She showed no signs of stopping, though she’d know when enough was enough. And enough was not enough until Olivia was doing exactly what she wanted. She intended to give Casey back a point, and she knew she had the skill to do it.
Tears stung Olivia’s eyes as the paddling continued, and she wondered if Liz’s intent was really to make her cry. Damnit though, she was close, as much as she didn’t want to admit it. A throbbing ache had taken up residence in her backside and thighs, overlaid with the sting of each new stroke, combining to become almost unbearable. She felt Liz pick up the pace, and finally she couldn’t hold back anymore and cried out, squeezing her eyes shut tight as tears leaked from the corners. She was most definitely humiliated. More so than she could ever remember being. And she was a very sorry young lady indeed. She wanted to reach back and stop the blows, but she knew from her experience on top that it would only make things worse. So she just tried to keep her tears to a dignified level.
Liz felt Olivia starting to break, and she gave Casey another wink before really laying it on, aiming her blows to the most sensitive parts of the detective’s flesh, ready to really drive the lesson home now.
Olivia cried out again, her tears falling faster. She didn’t think she could take any more. She had never been spanked so hard, or for so long, and she didn’t think Liz was ever going to stop. “Please, stop,” she begged, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand even as new tears continued to fall. “You can’t know how sorry I am…”
“Of course I can Detective. You’re sorry because she left you, not because of what you did.” The paddling continued at a hard, intense pace, and every male occupant of the room was shifting uncomfortably in their seat.
“No!” Olivia insisted loudly, shaking her head, her words slurred with her tears. “No Liz, that’s not true, I love her, I never meant to hurt her, please believe me!” Liv was getting desperate now, she needed it to stop, but more so she needed Liz to believe her. And she needed Casey to believe her more than she ever needed anything in her life. “Casey I love you,” she said in a broken sob, covering her face with her hands.
Casey was breathing hard, torn between arousal and guilt. Her pants were probably soaked through her panties, but she knew Olivia was truly sorry, and the fact that Liv was getting the shit beat out of her over Elliot’s desk, in front of the entire squad, just to prove how much she loved her… well that made her feel so many things it was hard to sort them out. One thing she did know, though, was that she was going to forgive Olivia, but she’d make her work a little more before she bent over any time soon. Now, though, hearing Olivia’s sweet, heartbroken sobs, she stood and approached the pair. “Liz,” she said softly, and when her boss looked at her, she nodded, and Liz got the point.
The EADA gave Olivia one last good smack, then tossed the paddle onto the desk and strode from the room.
Olivia didn’t even realize it was over until she felt Casey start stroking her hair. That only made her cry harder, which embarrassed her even further, and she wondered if she’d ever be able to come to work again. But then she realized that if Casey was stroking her hair, then she was at least considering speaking to her again, and the wave of relief that washed through her almost left her breathless as she lay across Elliot’s desk.
“Okay,” Casey said quietly, lowering Olivia’s skirt back down and then pulling her up into a loving embrace, cradling her lover like a baby. “Okay, Liv,” she whispered again, kissing Olivia’s forehead and gently wiping away her tears.
Olivia struggled to pull herself together, wrapping her arms around Casey’s neck and holding tightly. “I’ll never hurt you again, please forgive me Casey,” she whimpered, burying her face against the ADA.
“Shhhh,” Casey crooned. “We’ll talk in private. Just relax, shhhh… Let’s get you home.” She turned to Cragen, who had a notebook over his lap, and fought back a snort of laughter. “I trust you won’t object to giving her the day off?” she asked.
Cragen shook his head, refusing to speak.
“Good,” Casey said with a smirk, helping Olivia to her feet and picking up the detective’s jacket as they headed for the doors, then for Olivia’s apartment.