God I Don't Know
Today...Yesterday. God so much. So many emotions, so much pain. It's all spinning around in my mind. My head hurts, so bad. I can't even describe the pain I'm feeling.
Tom...I'm so sorry I was not there for you today. I was planning on flying out tonight, but I guess I was too late. I know how much your Mom meant to you. She meant a lot to me too, she was like a second mother to me. I should have been there, I should have told the director to screw and I should have flown out last night. I'm so sorry, I really am. *hugs* I'm here for you, anything you need. I know you're heading off to Hawaii for a few days, but I hope after that you'll come home, the apartment is lonely. Jas left today, she had to go back to her place. So come back soon. We need to talk, about everything with Katie, your mom. I'm here for you.
Noah...God, I Love You so much. I need to hear your voice, to know you're OK, I'm worried.
Last night was so perfect, everything. Noah, singing, holding me, laughing with me, smiling, kissing me. He sang to me last night. He sang a song that he said he was reserving for when he met someone special, "Everything I Do" by Bryan Adams. I cried. He made me cry, him singing those words, I just couldn't help it. He makes me so happy, no guy has ever done that before. There's something that just lets me breathe when I'm with him. I can't even begin to explain or describe it, I guess this is love. The only explanation I can think of.
And then he got upset, sad, depressed, however to put it. It was sudden, it surprised me. I told him no matter what I'd stay by his side, even if he tried to push me away. I was scared, but I stayed strong. He said he needed some time to think, to be alone, so he got up, grabbed some Vodka and left. He just...left. I just sank down to the floor and cried. I cried for hours, the whole time I was talking to Alex I never stopped. God, I was so worried about him, I still am. I love him with all my heart. I hate seeing him in pain and not being able to help him, to know that there is nothing I can do. I just have to stay strong I guess, stand by his side, no matter what. I'm so scared though....
I need something to try and calm this headache, I can't even see straight.
I Close my eyes
And even when I'm sleeping
I'm all right
Cz' you're in my life
Once upon a time
I could only imagine this
And now you're mine
Tom...I'm so sorry I was not there for you today. I was planning on flying out tonight, but I guess I was too late. I know how much your Mom meant to you. She meant a lot to me too, she was like a second mother to me. I should have been there, I should have told the director to screw and I should have flown out last night. I'm so sorry, I really am. *hugs* I'm here for you, anything you need. I know you're heading off to Hawaii for a few days, but I hope after that you'll come home, the apartment is lonely. Jas left today, she had to go back to her place. So come back soon. We need to talk, about everything with Katie, your mom. I'm here for you.
Noah...God, I Love You so much. I need to hear your voice, to know you're OK, I'm worried.
Last night was so perfect, everything. Noah, singing, holding me, laughing with me, smiling, kissing me. He sang to me last night. He sang a song that he said he was reserving for when he met someone special, "Everything I Do" by Bryan Adams. I cried. He made me cry, him singing those words, I just couldn't help it. He makes me so happy, no guy has ever done that before. There's something that just lets me breathe when I'm with him. I can't even begin to explain or describe it, I guess this is love. The only explanation I can think of.
And then he got upset, sad, depressed, however to put it. It was sudden, it surprised me. I told him no matter what I'd stay by his side, even if he tried to push me away. I was scared, but I stayed strong. He said he needed some time to think, to be alone, so he got up, grabbed some Vodka and left. He just...left. I just sank down to the floor and cried. I cried for hours, the whole time I was talking to Alex I never stopped. God, I was so worried about him, I still am. I love him with all my heart. I hate seeing him in pain and not being able to help him, to know that there is nothing I can do. I just have to stay strong I guess, stand by his side, no matter what. I'm so scared though....
I need something to try and calm this headache, I can't even see straight.
I Close my eyes
And even when I'm sleeping
I'm all right
Cz' you're in my life
Once upon a time
I could only imagine this
And now you're mine