Whoa Nellie!
FUNNIEST STORY EVER.
So I am at work today and the horses come back from the show they were at in Illinois. My coworkers and I head out to the stables to see the horses cuz it's pretty cool. (I met Victoria - or Dolly as they call her - the one who was the inspiration for the name of the store Victoria's Secret. And I met Authentic - or Bud as they call him - the Anheuser-Busch horse that won the gold at last year's olympics!)
I also met DeSilvio. A VERY large horse. His BACK (not his head, but his back where you sit) was at least six inches taller than me. I would've had to reach up to pet him. But I didn't want to pet him. Why not? one might ask. Because DeSilvio had a horsey hard-on. Oh yes...
I literally WATCHED this horse get chubbed up. DISGUSTING. Denise (my coworker) was standing next to me talking like nothing was happening. I WAS DYING. Here I am, standing in a stable, staring at a horse GETTING A STIFFY. It was HUGE.
Like a damn telescope extending outward from his underside! THE WIDTH OF A BOWL. I didn't even wait to see the length because I was so EMBARRASSED!
I kept thinking two things. 1) no more wondering how horses do it... it's so big, he probably just tosses over the wall into the next stall and let's the mare have her way. and 2) HOW THE HELL DO SICK WOMEN GET IT ON WITH HORSES?! I know I will never understand why, but I don't think I will ever understand how either! honestly thinking logistically, IT WOULD TEAR YOU IN HALF.
MESSED UP.
Well, at least somebody was excited to see me. hahaha
It's moments like these when you wish you had a camera phone so you could share the wealth. :P
So I am at work today and the horses come back from the show they were at in Illinois. My coworkers and I head out to the stables to see the horses cuz it's pretty cool. (I met Victoria - or Dolly as they call her - the one who was the inspiration for the name of the store Victoria's Secret. And I met Authentic - or Bud as they call him - the Anheuser-Busch horse that won the gold at last year's olympics!)
I also met DeSilvio. A VERY large horse. His BACK (not his head, but his back where you sit) was at least six inches taller than me. I would've had to reach up to pet him. But I didn't want to pet him. Why not? one might ask. Because DeSilvio had a horsey hard-on. Oh yes...
I literally WATCHED this horse get chubbed up. DISGUSTING. Denise (my coworker) was standing next to me talking like nothing was happening. I WAS DYING. Here I am, standing in a stable, staring at a horse GETTING A STIFFY. It was HUGE.
Like a damn telescope extending outward from his underside! THE WIDTH OF A BOWL. I didn't even wait to see the length because I was so EMBARRASSED!
I kept thinking two things. 1) no more wondering how horses do it... it's so big, he probably just tosses over the wall into the next stall and let's the mare have her way. and 2) HOW THE HELL DO SICK WOMEN GET IT ON WITH HORSES?! I know I will never understand why, but I don't think I will ever understand how either! honestly thinking logistically, IT WOULD TEAR YOU IN HALF.
MESSED UP.
Well, at least somebody was excited to see me. hahaha
It's moments like these when you wish you had a camera phone so you could share the wealth. :P