I'm thinking.....overthinking...total venting time
THIS IS THE CRAP I AM SICK OF!
I have two finals this week....have I studied for them? Funny ...but no...I haven't... and usually, if you know me... I'm obsessive about this stuff. Right now I have a lot going on...as you can tell from my last entry...things haven't been too good....first my dad, second I feel like I'm in the middle of a lot of different things and that I'm stuck...and I don't know what to do or say, I just want everyone to be happy. Sorry if it doesn't make sense but I'm pretty sure some people know what I'm talking about.
I'm sick of people fighting for dumb reasons. No one is perfect and we all make mistakes. It just sucks when people who used to be close aren't anymore and stuff. I just want to change everything and make everything better for everybody but then I'm the one who just gets hurt in the end and I'm sick of it. I can't help wanting to be there for people and listening to them. It's who I am, I like to listen and give my opinion. I just need to learn more how to just pray about everything instead of trying to fix things myself. I need to stop trying to carry the weight of others pains on my shoulders, I have too many of my own as it is. I can still listen, I just need to give it to God and let him do the "dirty" work.
I'm also sick of being let down by people. I think what they say will actually happen and seriously...like 99% of the time it never happens. Getting hurt over and over again, especially if its by someone who is supposed to be someone you look up to and adore....sucks! I need to be selfish and learn how to focus on my life and what my goals are and what my priorities are. I need to maintain a good balance with everything.
I need to spend more time with Nick. I love the guy. I want more time! I can't get enough of him...It sucks he lives an hour to 2 hours away(depending on traffic). It's hard because we are both so busy and I feel bad that he's the one always driving. I just wish it was easier...but of course it's me, and nothing is extremely easy when it comes to me.
Ok enough of me whining........lata
I have two finals this week....have I studied for them? Funny ...but no...I haven't... and usually, if you know me... I'm obsessive about this stuff. Right now I have a lot going on...as you can tell from my last entry...things haven't been too good....first my dad, second I feel like I'm in the middle of a lot of different things and that I'm stuck...and I don't know what to do or say, I just want everyone to be happy. Sorry if it doesn't make sense but I'm pretty sure some people know what I'm talking about.
I'm sick of people fighting for dumb reasons. No one is perfect and we all make mistakes. It just sucks when people who used to be close aren't anymore and stuff. I just want to change everything and make everything better for everybody but then I'm the one who just gets hurt in the end and I'm sick of it. I can't help wanting to be there for people and listening to them. It's who I am, I like to listen and give my opinion. I just need to learn more how to just pray about everything instead of trying to fix things myself. I need to stop trying to carry the weight of others pains on my shoulders, I have too many of my own as it is. I can still listen, I just need to give it to God and let him do the "dirty" work.
I'm also sick of being let down by people. I think what they say will actually happen and seriously...like 99% of the time it never happens. Getting hurt over and over again, especially if its by someone who is supposed to be someone you look up to and adore....sucks! I need to be selfish and learn how to focus on my life and what my goals are and what my priorities are. I need to maintain a good balance with everything.
I need to spend more time with Nick. I love the guy. I want more time! I can't get enough of him...It sucks he lives an hour to 2 hours away(depending on traffic). It's hard because we are both so busy and I feel bad that he's the one always driving. I just wish it was easier...but of course it's me, and nothing is extremely easy when it comes to me.
Ok enough of me whining........lata