[Fateverse Side Story: BB Bundle] Princess Twinkle
lol. so, uh. i was about to post the next serious part of Gardener, and this little thing wrote itself.
warnings: AU - Fateverse. sci-fi. mention of evil!Carol, evil!Steve, and evil!Nate. some background rule 63/het. little kids and questionable babysitters. language: pg-13 (for g**damn).
pairing: Lester/Aki (Bullseye/Daken).
timeline: maybe an hour or so after Sattva.
disclaimer: marvel owns all recognizable characters, i just made more alternate universe versions of them.
notes: 1) sandwich cutters are amazing. 2) of course Aki's pals with Doom. 3) even tomboys go through a phase where everything has to be sparkly and princess-y. i think there's something in the X chromosome that makes it imperative with a double dose.
Princess Twinkle
Lester looks up from making an incredibly symmetrical sandwich when he hears key hit lock at the front door.
“Funny how easy it is to meet with people in secret when your enemies think they’ve got your neck on the block,” Aki says.
“Maybe Rogers and his little terrorist pals forgot your neck grows back.”
Itsuko stops playing with her own sandwich (the halves of which are shaped like dinosaurs) to look up and say, “Nuh-uh! Mommy’s neck only goes back together if somebody holds it put.”
“Holds it still,” corrects Akiko.
“Whatever,” their daughter replies unconcernedly.
“How’d it go?” Lester asks.
His wife pauses to look outside the window-at Danvers, no doubt. “He’s in. And tied. It should all be very incriminating.”
Lester considers his sandwich and the best place to take a bite (for symmetry’s sake). The sandwich is delicious, but the bite was a little off-center, so he takes another to compensate. “So. We’re just supposed to sit here on our asses while Norman and the guys fight Rogers and his goons? Hope Wilson’s plan works, and Cable and Bob don’t blow up the world?”
“Sprite still stonewalling?”
He doesn’t know. He sets his sandwich down, washes his hands, goes to Sprite’s window to pick her up. “Hey.”
~Good afternoon, Lester,~ the Node says.
“You got any input on the situation? Deadpool at Stark’s place, Avengers prepping a surprise attack?”
~If we leave within the hour, we can arrive before full hostilities break out.~
Surprised, Lester taps the little glass sphere.
~Please don’t do that, Lester.~
“I was just-you’re not malfunctioning, are you? You changed your mind about the ‘hands off’ thing?”
~There are still many things I can’t tell you. But at this time I’m required by law to inform you that your presence as Bundle Keeper is mandated.~
“Mandated?”
~Clarification: by Network priority order, you and I must be present at Stark Industries’ New York headquarters in exactly seventy-two minutes. If we get there earlier, we can help the Avengers.~
Akiko snorts and calls someone. “Victor,” she purrs. “Remember that teensy-weensy little favor? Mm-hm, I’m calling it in. Oh, nothing too terrible…I just need a babysitter for a few hours while I go shred Steve Rogers’ smug goddamn face from his perfect little Aryan head.”
“What’s Aryan?” Itsuko whispers loudly to Lester.
“Depends who you ask,” he whispers back, washing his hands again so he can finish his sandwich.
“What if I asked a dinosaur?”
“A crunchy delicious person with blond hair.”
Aki frowns. “She’s not still there, is she? Of course she and I don’t get along, Victor, my daughter is allergic to her son. Mothers take that sort of thing personally… I didn’t say it was personal on my part, dear. Dander is dander. No, no, of course not-Helena loves the doombots. Don’t you, sweetie?”
“Doombots!” Itsuko cheers. “Uncle Victor, Uncle Victor, can I build a doombot yet?”
Akiko rolls her eyes. “Uncle Victor says we’ll see, sweetie.”
“Yay! Daddy, Daddy, I’m gonna make a doombot, and it’s gonna be the prettiest doombot ever. It’ll be magic and purple with pink sparklies and a happyface and butterfly wings…I’ll call it Princess Twinkle, and we’ll have slumber parties and go on picnics…”
Lester washes his hands once again and carefully ignores the idea of his four-year-old daughter constructing semi-autonomous robots.
“Mm-hm,” says Aki, still on the phone. “Right. Twenty minutes would be perfect, Victor.”
And it will. In about fifteen minutes, the Avengers will be attacking Stark’s place with pretty overwhelming odds, and Danvers will rush off to help. They’ll have plenty of time to unplug everything before they go.
It’s been a long time since Lester was out in the field. He hopes he hasn’t gotten rusty.
“Tell me again about this elaborate revenge fantasy of yours, honey,” he says as he heads upstairs to fetch his old uniform out of the closet.
.End.
merianmoriarty has my formal permission to pimp my fics on various comms (if/when i ever abandon deviantART, i'll go ahead and join the comms myself and take care of getting things posted in the right places). no one has permission to re-post this ANYWHERE, but feel free to share or link.
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