Excuse me miss, could you put your shirt back down please?
I really wanted to go to a Mardi Gras ball this year, but for some reason you have to have a ticket to get into any of them. Why don't they have a generic ball where anyone can pay thirty dollars or so to get dressed up and drink in the spirit of the holidays? I've got everything necessary: Tails, a hot date, a little spending cash, I've even been drinking large amounts of yellow, green, and purple food coloring so my vomit stains on the dance floor will match the wall decorations. Wait, all those colors mixed together make brown right? Oh well, I salute the only holiday where alcohol, gaudy jewelry, and flashing are to be expected from everyone and every age group.