When you don't think you can, but know that you can't help it
I wrote a fic. A fic in two parts, with two different pairings, where both parts are interconnected. I got the full idea almost one year and a half ago, but life and a thousand things got in the way.
At two different points in that span of time, spring 2007 and Christmas to be exact, two LJ-friends almost discouraged me from even trying by posting a fic on the first of the pairings, unusual as it is, with similar scenarios. As much as I liked their works, I’m afraid that I didn’t leave the comments they deserved because I was too busy biting the proverbial handkerchief.
And my tongue.
I realized that, aside from the huge gap in writing skills, there was not much I had to add to what the other two writers had already provided. Besides, after reading hundreds of doujinshi and dozens of fics, I could hardly aim for originality in any way.
Nevertheless, I’ve always believed that every fan’s perspective counts and I kept feeling that I really wanted to work on that pairing myself. It was an urge like I had not suffered in years, and the movie in my head was driving me insane with the writing itch.
I finally surrendered last spring. I started plotting, writing and even changed the title for the first part, as it had already been used before my eyes for the very same pairing. Unfunny enough, the drive to write the second part was far more powerful, but I forced myself to be orderly about my work and that slowed things down a bit.
You must know that this is the first time I write a story in English. All through the process, I felt as though I was running a marathon on crutches. I struggled with simple words and had to Google phrases to make sure they even existed and were used by natives, as I have a penchant for word creation, literal translation of my Spanish thoughts, and general violation of any given language, including my own, in order to fit my random thought processes.
Well, those of you who follow my usual LJ-activity know the extent of my English skills and the level of my felonies against grammar and orthography. So if the end result is somehow clean and clear, I truly owe it to my two betas, who sent me back a text as full of red as my old school homework.
I can’t show them enough gratitude in words, so here is something visual I dedicate to both of them:
I had long decided that I wanted the fic to be ready for November 25th, which is the anniversary of my Hufflepuff fic (looong and in Spanish). Fate had it almost coincide with the last deadline for the community santa_smex, and I thought it would be fun to work with the same deadline as some of my favorite writers, to have a taste of their pressure and their difficulties.
Now I intend to take my fic out there and out of the way in my brain before December 1st, to enjoy at leisure what could well be the last of these fests. I checked when the requests came out and someone had asked for that infamous first pairing, so I also wanted to reduce the risk that I had to bang my head against the wall once more before I had the chance to post my simple and silly story. That gave me all the extra pressure I needed!
That is why, for the whole of the past week, we have been working together against the clock. I was late in delivering the final draft, and they didn’t have much time to revise it, so if there is still something that sounds amiss, it is not the fault of a slacking beta but of a slacking, green writer.
A few warnings:
1. The things we like to read sometimes are not the same we like to write. As a reader, I allow for a lot of liberties and seriousness in other people’s fics. To me, though, PoT has always been a fandom revolving around crack, and these boys are anything but normal. I have tried to stick to their personalities to the best of my rookie’s ability, and added a bit of a real-Japan, real-life touch. Yet it might clash with your interpretation of the characters.
2. I try to stay as close to canon as possible and from all different sources combined. However, when there is conflict between them, the anime usually has the last word for me.
3. I don’t really write smut. I love reading smut, well-written, non-repetitive smut. I just don’t have the patience or the inclination to elaborate on Discovery Channel activities made poetry. There is sex, not as explicit, serious and well detailed as you (and I!) might like, but it is there. When I write, I want it that way.
Bonus:
So as not to raise false hopes (as if!), I’ll just advance that it is mostly Seigaku-centric. But-but-but. I have tried not to use it as a ship manifesto. But-but-but. I love them so much. Hyoutei may own my soul, but it seems Seigaku still owns my heart. Seigaku and all of their friends.
Starting tomorrow, I will be posting the two mutually dependent parts on different days:
1. The first part (1st pairing) has around 6,600 words.
2. The second part (2nd pairing) has around 13,800 words.
3. I might add a making-of with random facts because I am that obsessed. I’d like to wrap it up this week, and then move on with life at last.
If you feel brave and patient enough to read my experiment, I will be definitely looking forward to hearing your opinion, whatever it is. So please stay tuned!