Get Away
Dear Mary,
I have a lot of insecurities in my life thanks to you.
My looks. My sex appeal.
Mostly.
My capabilities "in bed" can be thrown in there as well.
I think about you more than he does. Ha, I think about you at all and he thinks about you never. It doesn't take much.
My mother says I have a lot of insecurities (because of you,) which surprised her.
Because I'm a strong person.
I guess that's what happens when the love of your life chooses someone else.
But he was a fool. He was a fool who didn't see what was in front of him.
And then when he did, he ran as far away from you as possible.
(To me. I like to tell myself it worked that way. But I know life isn't a fairy tale.)
I hate you. Go away.
I have no questions about our relationship, his and mine. He loves ME. I don't deny it. I don't question it. I don't doubt it. I KNOW it.
But what I don't know is whether or not you're still
sexier
than me.
Whether or not you're still
better in bed.
And those things I'm told I just need to let go, because I will never know the answer (and chances are I wouldn't like the answer) and thinking about them will only drive myself sick.
I hate you. Go away.
Get out of my head.
You're not in my dreams anymore, so that's good.
Now get out of my head.
Please?
I'm sick of agonizing.
I wish my mind could comprehend the fact that whether or not I'm better than you doesn't matter. But it can't. Because I'm wired on competition. So now that I have won everything, I'm stuck on two last and final questions that I'm too afraid to ask, that he won't answer anyway.
So just go away.
I'm tired of dreading on this past idolized goddess view of you. You never were her. I'm certainly not her, but you never were her. (Ugh. Except that I still think you were.)
Fuck, why am I still going?
-The Her.
I have a lot of insecurities in my life thanks to you.
My looks. My sex appeal.
Mostly.
My capabilities "in bed" can be thrown in there as well.
I think about you more than he does. Ha, I think about you at all and he thinks about you never. It doesn't take much.
My mother says I have a lot of insecurities (because of you,) which surprised her.
Because I'm a strong person.
I guess that's what happens when the love of your life chooses someone else.
But he was a fool. He was a fool who didn't see what was in front of him.
And then when he did, he ran as far away from you as possible.
(To me. I like to tell myself it worked that way. But I know life isn't a fairy tale.)
I hate you. Go away.
I have no questions about our relationship, his and mine. He loves ME. I don't deny it. I don't question it. I don't doubt it. I KNOW it.
But what I don't know is whether or not you're still
sexier
than me.
Whether or not you're still
better in bed.
And those things I'm told I just need to let go, because I will never know the answer (and chances are I wouldn't like the answer) and thinking about them will only drive myself sick.
I hate you. Go away.
Get out of my head.
You're not in my dreams anymore, so that's good.
Now get out of my head.
Please?
I'm sick of agonizing.
I wish my mind could comprehend the fact that whether or not I'm better than you doesn't matter. But it can't. Because I'm wired on competition. So now that I have won everything, I'm stuck on two last and final questions that I'm too afraid to ask, that he won't answer anyway.
So just go away.
I'm tired of dreading on this past idolized goddess view of you. You never were her. I'm certainly not her, but you never were her. (Ugh. Except that I still think you were.)
Fuck, why am I still going?
-The Her.