Meta: bunch of random half-thoughts
S. Hotmail doesn't seem to be working for me. I can't get to any of my email. (eta: working now. It was down for hours!)
A. My brain hurts from trying to write too many concepts and not enough plot.
D. I'm at work, I have no laptop, and I can't think.
!. I always have a billion fandom, meta, fic thoughts that I just don't post about because I want to Think Them Out and present them in an orderly fashion, so we can have real, big discussions about them. See S.-D. for why I'm not about to do that.
Instead, I brain-dump all at once.
Closed vs. Open Canon, Writing AUs
I don't get this whole deal about closed canon being more difficult to write in than open canon. In open canon, you start from the last ep/book/movie/comic/etc, and extrapolate different things that could happen. And the reason you can't pick BtVS S3 ep 14, or HP:GoF, or whatever, and extrapolate from there is...why? Are AUs really such an anathema? Or are people so stuck in a rut that once (all-knowing-mystical) Canon (amen) does something, there's nothing different you can think to happen at earlier points?
Dark!fics: definition, and the endless 'vs. fluff' debate.
A long, long time ago, there was that meme about My Dark!fic. The meme confused me, as so many people seemed to be saying, "Well, it's only dark if it's well written, or if I respect it," which to me, had an underlying connotation of, "DARK = GOOD." Um. No? Dark is admittedly something that's emerged as a "fanfic genre", and as such it's something we need to define for ourselves. But does it need to be so subjective?
Unpopular Fannish Opinion #1: Fandom, I owe you nothing.
There's this cyclical debate between the people who see fandom as a community to which you should pay dues, mow your lawns, vs people who see fandom as fun/a hobby to which they owe nothing. Except the best work you can do.
Um. Excuse me? I'm always nodding along with the latter group, until suddenly, these "except"s crop up. I don't owe fandom good fic. I don't owe fandom fic at all! I don't owe fandom proper English or complete sentences! I don't owe fandom schlock. Except, ok, maybe one thing: I owe fandom the understanding that I get out what I put in.
Wait, no, not even that. I have the right to be a dickhead and whine about no one loving me, even though I don't do anything that invites said love. The reason I don't is because I feel I owe that to myself. I owe it to my self-respect not to be an ass-hat, not to anyone else. And those that don't believe that, and are asshats--I'm glad they have the right to be so. I'm glad they're here because I like to laugh at them. And watch more patient people than me tell them to suck it.
Liking characters as people vs. liking them as characters.
I was having this conversation with redbrickrose:
me: It's interesting to me, the difference between liking a character as a person and liking a character as a character, because I think there's something in between too, that I can't quite put my finger on. [...]
Hannah: There is, and I'm confused too because I've been sitting here trying to word my response and I . . . can't. A lot of it comes down to which characters resonate, I guess and that's so subjective. To continue to use Cally as an example - if I look at it objectively, I find her really sympathetic and all of her reactions make perfect sense in light of the situation she's in. I think I could formulate an argument defending her. Subjectively, while I don't dislike her as a person or as a character, I'm just not all that invested because she doesn't resonate with me. Sometimes character who are HORRIBLE PEOPLE do resonate with me and I can LOVE them even if I don't like them as people. Or it's like Baltar and I don't love him at all, and he doesn't really resonate, but I like to watch him anyway because I find him compelling. So there are other responses, yes, but they are hard to articulate.
Fanfic as the fulfillment which canon lacks.
The way many get into fanfic is best described in this way: two characters on the screen. You're shouting, "Kiss already!" They don't. You go write a fic where they do.
Fanfic is so often wish-fulfillment. Fanfic is often also bad. I wonder, is the lack of kissing, lack of explicit sex, lack of characters whom we'd like to see get together actually together--is that what really makes a good work of fiction? So many people complain about Whedon never letting people have happy relationships, but I think that's true of many artists and creators. They think we don't want to actually watch B/A be fluffy and happy forever. Well, a part of us does, but the angst was what kept us watching. And is this part of the dark vs. fluff debate? O_o
List of fictional unkinks.
E. I feel ambivalent about this list, because I wouldn't want people to look at it and think, "I've written that! TKP must hate my fic!" Uh, no. I think anything can be enjoyable is well written.
R. I don't mean squicks. These are just things that from their abundance in fiction, I assume some people like them. They don't make me turn and run; they just don't do anything for me.
M. I'm going to try to get 100 and then maybe it'll get it's own post.
1. The word "stabbing" in sex scenes.
2. Giving of gifts between loved ones.
3. Celebration, or notation, of anniversaries of anything.
4. Lust at first sight. When all characters can think about is how hot other characters get them, or when it's not all they can think about, but it's a significant distraction.
5. Constant masturbation over object of said lust.
6. Weather symbolism, direct attention called to weather symbolism.
7. Fabric metaphors and similes.
8. The cry, "Aieeeeeee!"
9. Bloodplay.
10. The word, "Master".
What's so intimidating about the blank page/screen?
I have this writing quirk I think others must not share: starting to write on the blank page tends to be easier for me than continuing to write after I've already written 50,000 words of text. That is, I like to start things. I'm always starting things. And when I get a certain amount done, and then get stuck . . . I call up a new doc so it feels like I'm starting something completely new, and start fresh on that doc, and then only later C&P what I've written into the story I've already started. Am I the only one who does this?
And what's so intimidating about the blank page? Is it that you don't know where to start? I do know that I spent four hours today staring at a list of concepts, but didn't know what plot to give to the concepts, so ended up making this post. But...what is it that you're missing? Plot? Theme? What seraphcelene and I were calling "shape"? And what is shape, anyway? Is it a format? List of events? Style? Rhythm? Premise? Concept? What is my motivation? Why do I have so many thoughts?"
Interconnectivity of Jossverse.
When I want to write fic I don't want to tell a story so much as say something about the characters. Even when my idea starts out as plot based, I write not because I want to see what happens, so much as I want want what happens to reveal who the characters are inside, and to affect that core.
Lots of people say they're burned out on Jossverse; they feel like there are few new stories to tell any more. The more time I spend with it, the more...opposite of that I feel. I feel almost stymied because I'm so overwhelmed by all the possibilities here, by the way some of these characters parallel each other and intersect in so many ways.
Those four hours today, I spent contemplating how Xander is really Angel, and Fred is Cordelia is Faith is Drusilla is Dana is even Jenny Calendar, how Xander/Illyria works in my head, how Buffy is Darla is even Anya, how Willow is Jasmine, how Warren is equivalent to and the antithesis of Jasmine, how Xander was pulling Willow out of her own grave while Connor was puttin Angel into the ocean, a dream Xander has of Anya wearing clothes they never role played in, Xander saying, "I've been everywhere; I don't want to see the world any more," and Anya saying, "I could show you. The things you've always seen, the things most dear." And Xander, "Show me. Show me your world." And Anya, "Close your eyes." And Xander's eyes snap open, and finds himself tangled with Drusilla, who is really Cordelia, tangled with Angel, the sheets strewn about them in such a way that they will never, ever escape the web.
A. My brain hurts from trying to write too many concepts and not enough plot.
D. I'm at work, I have no laptop, and I can't think.
!. I always have a billion fandom, meta, fic thoughts that I just don't post about because I want to Think Them Out and present them in an orderly fashion, so we can have real, big discussions about them. See S.-D. for why I'm not about to do that.
Instead, I brain-dump all at once.
Closed vs. Open Canon, Writing AUs
I don't get this whole deal about closed canon being more difficult to write in than open canon. In open canon, you start from the last ep/book/movie/comic/etc, and extrapolate different things that could happen. And the reason you can't pick BtVS S3 ep 14, or HP:GoF, or whatever, and extrapolate from there is...why? Are AUs really such an anathema? Or are people so stuck in a rut that once (all-knowing-mystical) Canon (amen) does something, there's nothing different you can think to happen at earlier points?
Dark!fics: definition, and the endless 'vs. fluff' debate.
A long, long time ago, there was that meme about My Dark!fic. The meme confused me, as so many people seemed to be saying, "Well, it's only dark if it's well written, or if I respect it," which to me, had an underlying connotation of, "DARK = GOOD." Um. No? Dark is admittedly something that's emerged as a "fanfic genre", and as such it's something we need to define for ourselves. But does it need to be so subjective?
Unpopular Fannish Opinion #1: Fandom, I owe you nothing.
There's this cyclical debate between the people who see fandom as a community to which you should pay dues, mow your lawns, vs people who see fandom as fun/a hobby to which they owe nothing. Except the best work you can do.
Um. Excuse me? I'm always nodding along with the latter group, until suddenly, these "except"s crop up. I don't owe fandom good fic. I don't owe fandom fic at all! I don't owe fandom proper English or complete sentences! I don't owe fandom schlock. Except, ok, maybe one thing: I owe fandom the understanding that I get out what I put in.
Wait, no, not even that. I have the right to be a dickhead and whine about no one loving me, even though I don't do anything that invites said love. The reason I don't is because I feel I owe that to myself. I owe it to my self-respect not to be an ass-hat, not to anyone else. And those that don't believe that, and are asshats--I'm glad they have the right to be so. I'm glad they're here because I like to laugh at them. And watch more patient people than me tell them to suck it.
Liking characters as people vs. liking them as characters.
I was having this conversation with redbrickrose:
me: It's interesting to me, the difference between liking a character as a person and liking a character as a character, because I think there's something in between too, that I can't quite put my finger on. [...]
Hannah: There is, and I'm confused too because I've been sitting here trying to word my response and I . . . can't. A lot of it comes down to which characters resonate, I guess and that's so subjective. To continue to use Cally as an example - if I look at it objectively, I find her really sympathetic and all of her reactions make perfect sense in light of the situation she's in. I think I could formulate an argument defending her. Subjectively, while I don't dislike her as a person or as a character, I'm just not all that invested because she doesn't resonate with me. Sometimes character who are HORRIBLE PEOPLE do resonate with me and I can LOVE them even if I don't like them as people. Or it's like Baltar and I don't love him at all, and he doesn't really resonate, but I like to watch him anyway because I find him compelling. So there are other responses, yes, but they are hard to articulate.
Fanfic as the fulfillment which canon lacks.
The way many get into fanfic is best described in this way: two characters on the screen. You're shouting, "Kiss already!" They don't. You go write a fic where they do.
Fanfic is so often wish-fulfillment. Fanfic is often also bad. I wonder, is the lack of kissing, lack of explicit sex, lack of characters whom we'd like to see get together actually together--is that what really makes a good work of fiction? So many people complain about Whedon never letting people have happy relationships, but I think that's true of many artists and creators. They think we don't want to actually watch B/A be fluffy and happy forever. Well, a part of us does, but the angst was what kept us watching. And is this part of the dark vs. fluff debate? O_o
List of fictional unkinks.
E. I feel ambivalent about this list, because I wouldn't want people to look at it and think, "I've written that! TKP must hate my fic!" Uh, no. I think anything can be enjoyable is well written.
R. I don't mean squicks. These are just things that from their abundance in fiction, I assume some people like them. They don't make me turn and run; they just don't do anything for me.
M. I'm going to try to get 100 and then maybe it'll get it's own post.
1. The word "stabbing" in sex scenes.
2. Giving of gifts between loved ones.
3. Celebration, or notation, of anniversaries of anything.
4. Lust at first sight. When all characters can think about is how hot other characters get them, or when it's not all they can think about, but it's a significant distraction.
5. Constant masturbation over object of said lust.
6. Weather symbolism, direct attention called to weather symbolism.
7. Fabric metaphors and similes.
8. The cry, "Aieeeeeee!"
9. Bloodplay.
10. The word, "Master".
What's so intimidating about the blank page/screen?
I have this writing quirk I think others must not share: starting to write on the blank page tends to be easier for me than continuing to write after I've already written 50,000 words of text. That is, I like to start things. I'm always starting things. And when I get a certain amount done, and then get stuck . . . I call up a new doc so it feels like I'm starting something completely new, and start fresh on that doc, and then only later C&P what I've written into the story I've already started. Am I the only one who does this?
And what's so intimidating about the blank page? Is it that you don't know where to start? I do know that I spent four hours today staring at a list of concepts, but didn't know what plot to give to the concepts, so ended up making this post. But...what is it that you're missing? Plot? Theme? What seraphcelene and I were calling "shape"? And what is shape, anyway? Is it a format? List of events? Style? Rhythm? Premise? Concept? What is my motivation? Why do I have so many thoughts?"
Interconnectivity of Jossverse.
When I want to write fic I don't want to tell a story so much as say something about the characters. Even when my idea starts out as plot based, I write not because I want to see what happens, so much as I want want what happens to reveal who the characters are inside, and to affect that core.
Lots of people say they're burned out on Jossverse; they feel like there are few new stories to tell any more. The more time I spend with it, the more...opposite of that I feel. I feel almost stymied because I'm so overwhelmed by all the possibilities here, by the way some of these characters parallel each other and intersect in so many ways.
Those four hours today, I spent contemplating how Xander is really Angel, and Fred is Cordelia is Faith is Drusilla is Dana is even Jenny Calendar, how Xander/Illyria works in my head, how Buffy is Darla is even Anya, how Willow is Jasmine, how Warren is equivalent to and the antithesis of Jasmine, how Xander was pulling Willow out of her own grave while Connor was puttin Angel into the ocean, a dream Xander has of Anya wearing clothes they never role played in, Xander saying, "I've been everywhere; I don't want to see the world any more," and Anya saying, "I could show you. The things you've always seen, the things most dear." And Xander, "Show me. Show me your world." And Anya, "Close your eyes." And Xander's eyes snap open, and finds himself tangled with Drusilla, who is really Cordelia, tangled with Angel, the sheets strewn about them in such a way that they will never, ever escape the web.