(no subject)
He got into a car acciedent and it's bad. I'm scared. I am supposed to go see him this weekend in the hospital. His parents are flying up. I am so afriad of what I might see. The doctors won't say anything over the phone except that he will live. What if there are complications? What if they made a mistake and he has eternal bleeding or something? Doctors are only human and they make mistakes. What if they made a mistake on this one? What if, when I get there, he's...gone. I can't do school right now. I can't do work and I can't do cheerleading. I have been a basket-case thinking about this and I don't know how the hell I am going to get through the week. God: Help me. Help him. Please don't take him away from me. I need him. I need cocky-ass to stay alive. I need him to make me laugh, cry and get angry. I need him period: Maybe I am freaking out too much and everything is ok. But I over react! I take really small situations and make them this big issue! And I am entitled to do this because the first guy I fell in love with is hurt and all I can get from the doctors is, "It was bad but he'll live." What the hell is that going to do for me? Am I supposed to rest easier at night or something? I can't STAND doctors. I never have and I won't ever. God: Give me strength.