Early morning ramblings....
Good morning everyone...
I woke up about a half hour ago after maybe 2 hours of fitful sleep...idek why, I just couldn't make myself go back to sleep once my eyes snapped open. My sleep schedule has been completely screwed anyway, I slept until about 6:30 yesterday.
Yesterday was my first day of trying to quit smoking, and er...I fail. I made it about 12/13 hours without a cigarette (most of that time I was sleeping, but I guess I can count it anyway), but when we went to Starbucks and CVS before Idol, I bought a pack. I only smoked 4 between 9 oclock and 3:30, which is...amazing for me, but if Jared hadn't been holding on to them and riding my ass about it, that whole pack would probably be gone right now. And I know I should have quit the moment I found out I was pregnant...but stopping something you've been doing on a daily basis for 10 years, just like that? Uhh. Yeah. Not really gonna happen like that. But I am REALLY trying. We'll see how today goes. I'll probably start using this journal a bit more, just to get some of that frustration and excess energy out. And if I snap at any of you or act like a total bitch in the next few months...god, I am so sorry, in advance.
Ho boy. So when the show ended, I was...disappointed and distressed. I felt like I had just watched David Cook throw the entire competition...just kind of throw in the towel and walk away. Not because he did a new song, that was a stroke of genius, but because...it didn't feel like a song he could win the competition with. I felt like he knew it wasn't a winning song, but didn't care. And I know I pissed some people off with that very unpopular opinion. But in watching it again, and reading the article makemeabeliever linked in her journal and on the davidcookai7 community, I realized how very wrong I was. And after getting some blood in my nicotine stream (heh), I calmed down, relaxed, and voted. my. ass. off. As much as I could. I only got through once on the actual phone lines in the entire 4 hour process (so, yay, I guess?) And DialIdol is predicting that David C is the winner by at least 10% of the vote. We'll see what happens tonight, but I'm feeling pretty sanguine about it.
This season has been so odd, especially considering that I only started watching last year, and it really changed my life, finding Blake and all the wonderful Cake fans. I didn't have that this year, and it felt like a lot of us who were brought together by Cake were divided pretty bitterly by the end of the season. Which is a lot of the reason I didn't fangirl too much here in my own journal, I stuck to Ren's comm and I lurked on the TWOP boards. not cause I didn't want to share my opinion, but because I didn't want to run the risk of pissing anyone off, which I did anyway Top 4 week, lol. So I'm sorry to those of you who were mad about my opinions about Jason, which were wrong in the end anyway, unless JCas liked to lie to the press, which I highly doubt. And the fandom experience this season isn't quite over yet, I'm going to try to find some way to get to either Tampa or Sunrise for the tour, if I can scrape the money together...cause even though I'll be 8 months pregnant, I don't want to miss seeing DCook, Jason, Michael, Carly, and Brooke (my favorites by the end of it).
That being said, I don't think I'm going to watch next year. I get way too emotionally invested in my favorite, and in the show as a whole, and I have to be able to focus on my daughter and my fiancee. Life is too precious to watch it pass you by while you're watching reality TV. Plus, Randy, Paula, and Simon have really really been pissing me off, and it's just not worth it for me anymore. I got what I needed from my Idol watching experience, and after tonight I'll finally be able to move on from it. I'll be mad if DialIdol is wrong, but it won't be the end of the world for me. I'll still buy David's album in November/December, I'll still be involved in the fandom...but I'll never let it completely own my life for 5 months again. It's not healthy for me.
Wow, that got a lot longer than I intended it to, lol.
Alright, I'm gonna go get distracted by stuff on the internets now and wait for TWOP and EW's recaps of tonight to go live.
I love you guys.
I woke up about a half hour ago after maybe 2 hours of fitful sleep...idek why, I just couldn't make myself go back to sleep once my eyes snapped open. My sleep schedule has been completely screwed anyway, I slept until about 6:30 yesterday.
Yesterday was my first day of trying to quit smoking, and er...I fail. I made it about 12/13 hours without a cigarette (most of that time I was sleeping, but I guess I can count it anyway), but when we went to Starbucks and CVS before Idol, I bought a pack. I only smoked 4 between 9 oclock and 3:30, which is...amazing for me, but if Jared hadn't been holding on to them and riding my ass about it, that whole pack would probably be gone right now. And I know I should have quit the moment I found out I was pregnant...but stopping something you've been doing on a daily basis for 10 years, just like that? Uhh. Yeah. Not really gonna happen like that. But I am REALLY trying. We'll see how today goes. I'll probably start using this journal a bit more, just to get some of that frustration and excess energy out. And if I snap at any of you or act like a total bitch in the next few months...god, I am so sorry, in advance.
Ho boy. So when the show ended, I was...disappointed and distressed. I felt like I had just watched David Cook throw the entire competition...just kind of throw in the towel and walk away. Not because he did a new song, that was a stroke of genius, but because...it didn't feel like a song he could win the competition with. I felt like he knew it wasn't a winning song, but didn't care. And I know I pissed some people off with that very unpopular opinion. But in watching it again, and reading the article makemeabeliever linked in her journal and on the davidcookai7 community, I realized how very wrong I was. And after getting some blood in my nicotine stream (heh), I calmed down, relaxed, and voted. my. ass. off. As much as I could. I only got through once on the actual phone lines in the entire 4 hour process (so, yay, I guess?) And DialIdol is predicting that David C is the winner by at least 10% of the vote. We'll see what happens tonight, but I'm feeling pretty sanguine about it.
This season has been so odd, especially considering that I only started watching last year, and it really changed my life, finding Blake and all the wonderful Cake fans. I didn't have that this year, and it felt like a lot of us who were brought together by Cake were divided pretty bitterly by the end of the season. Which is a lot of the reason I didn't fangirl too much here in my own journal, I stuck to Ren's comm and I lurked on the TWOP boards. not cause I didn't want to share my opinion, but because I didn't want to run the risk of pissing anyone off, which I did anyway Top 4 week, lol. So I'm sorry to those of you who were mad about my opinions about Jason, which were wrong in the end anyway, unless JCas liked to lie to the press, which I highly doubt. And the fandom experience this season isn't quite over yet, I'm going to try to find some way to get to either Tampa or Sunrise for the tour, if I can scrape the money together...cause even though I'll be 8 months pregnant, I don't want to miss seeing DCook, Jason, Michael, Carly, and Brooke (my favorites by the end of it).
That being said, I don't think I'm going to watch next year. I get way too emotionally invested in my favorite, and in the show as a whole, and I have to be able to focus on my daughter and my fiancee. Life is too precious to watch it pass you by while you're watching reality TV. Plus, Randy, Paula, and Simon have really really been pissing me off, and it's just not worth it for me anymore. I got what I needed from my Idol watching experience, and after tonight I'll finally be able to move on from it. I'll be mad if DialIdol is wrong, but it won't be the end of the world for me. I'll still buy David's album in November/December, I'll still be involved in the fandom...but I'll never let it completely own my life for 5 months again. It's not healthy for me.
Wow, that got a lot longer than I intended it to, lol.
Alright, I'm gonna go get distracted by stuff on the internets now and wait for TWOP and EW's recaps of tonight to go live.
I love you guys.