(no subject)
a note on a scale is a note on a scale, and there is nothing that you can do to change the make up of that note. but sitting at my parents piano after months without practice, playing with my niece, notes sporadically harmonizing and clashing, it reminds me so much more of context, and just how much order and timing and surrounding completely form our perception of those notes.
so on the long drive home from kyle's last night, mixtape from kyle in the stereo, it makes sense when i wish i could have a few people who i really want to have an understanding of me in the car with me right then and there. things about a person just make so much more sense when you see them in the midst of the things that shaped them. i could spend hours explaining so many things, but somehow i get this feeling that i could just take you on a walk around my hometown, or through my old neighborhood, or on a bike ride downtown to the lakes and gardens, and without saying a word, so many of those things would just make sense. more so than with explanation, even.
it's like kyle and i in the living room of his parents house, guitar and piano, finally playing together again, just like when we first started. when he first made me see potential in myself by putting our peices in context. everything took such new life, and the simplest of parts became so beautiful to me when our timid notes and chords grasped onto one anothers. when we play, i feel like there's such a deep understanding of eachother. we can hear where the songs are coming from, what shaped them, what one another hear in them, and therefore help make the translation so much more relevant, and bring out so many different feelings in the same few chords. simple skeletons of songs take on so much new life, feeling, rhythm, movement just by putting their two sides together.
which is also why i never really feel like someone knows me until they've seen me in the company of kevin, kyle, john, curtis, gwen, jake. or playing music, or sitting in the kitchen with my mom just shooting the shit. they know parts of me, obviously, but gills in the desert don't mean shit. it's not until you see a fish swim that it's inner workings and physical make up finally start to make sense.
and so sitting with kali in the gardens downtown talking about where we are and where we've come from, or on a late night walk by the lakes with my brother, or sitting on a dock with my dad, i've been thinking about so many things in terms of how they've shaped me, why i feel such deep connections to the things i do, how where i come from effects my perception of the world, the ways i interact people, my passions, ideas, ethics. i'm figuring out alot about myself, and remembering so much of why and where things come from, which of course makes so much difference in what i want from myself.
and it makes me feel really thankful to have people and places so much at the core of me that just being in their presence can bring out so much in me that otherwise wouldn't exist. it reminds me of the third consciousness we form in our every interaction, and of the infinite potentials of those interactions. of how important it is to be honest, deliberate, supportive, focused, in each and every one. of how sacred our bonds are, because we hold keys to parts of one another that only each specific person can bring out. because every interaction is instrumental to our formation, and we really do reflect so much of one another. like mosaics, our combinations of so many of eachother's shapes and colors and hues that make us everything we are.
and for all of these things i feel immensely thankful. for our notes and chords, as accents and highlights, each unique to our every interaction. our coming together and working in and out, our majors and minors, rises and falls, and the life we create from it all.
for these things i do give thanks.
so on the long drive home from kyle's last night, mixtape from kyle in the stereo, it makes sense when i wish i could have a few people who i really want to have an understanding of me in the car with me right then and there. things about a person just make so much more sense when you see them in the midst of the things that shaped them. i could spend hours explaining so many things, but somehow i get this feeling that i could just take you on a walk around my hometown, or through my old neighborhood, or on a bike ride downtown to the lakes and gardens, and without saying a word, so many of those things would just make sense. more so than with explanation, even.
it's like kyle and i in the living room of his parents house, guitar and piano, finally playing together again, just like when we first started. when he first made me see potential in myself by putting our peices in context. everything took such new life, and the simplest of parts became so beautiful to me when our timid notes and chords grasped onto one anothers. when we play, i feel like there's such a deep understanding of eachother. we can hear where the songs are coming from, what shaped them, what one another hear in them, and therefore help make the translation so much more relevant, and bring out so many different feelings in the same few chords. simple skeletons of songs take on so much new life, feeling, rhythm, movement just by putting their two sides together.
which is also why i never really feel like someone knows me until they've seen me in the company of kevin, kyle, john, curtis, gwen, jake. or playing music, or sitting in the kitchen with my mom just shooting the shit. they know parts of me, obviously, but gills in the desert don't mean shit. it's not until you see a fish swim that it's inner workings and physical make up finally start to make sense.
and so sitting with kali in the gardens downtown talking about where we are and where we've come from, or on a late night walk by the lakes with my brother, or sitting on a dock with my dad, i've been thinking about so many things in terms of how they've shaped me, why i feel such deep connections to the things i do, how where i come from effects my perception of the world, the ways i interact people, my passions, ideas, ethics. i'm figuring out alot about myself, and remembering so much of why and where things come from, which of course makes so much difference in what i want from myself.
and it makes me feel really thankful to have people and places so much at the core of me that just being in their presence can bring out so much in me that otherwise wouldn't exist. it reminds me of the third consciousness we form in our every interaction, and of the infinite potentials of those interactions. of how important it is to be honest, deliberate, supportive, focused, in each and every one. of how sacred our bonds are, because we hold keys to parts of one another that only each specific person can bring out. because every interaction is instrumental to our formation, and we really do reflect so much of one another. like mosaics, our combinations of so many of eachother's shapes and colors and hues that make us everything we are.
and for all of these things i feel immensely thankful. for our notes and chords, as accents and highlights, each unique to our every interaction. our coming together and working in and out, our majors and minors, rises and falls, and the life we create from it all.
for these things i do give thanks.