(nancytribe)
This delay is simply intolerable. I like Jeremy well enough, but he is, after all, a vampire, and I really don't trust him to either return to London from Los Angeles, or fulfill his end of our little bargain. It's so unfair, really. I've been in possession of this spell for eighteen years -- eighteen long, lonely, and relentless years -- and this is the first time I've ever had the possibility of using it. If I could do the spell myself, I would have done, years ago. The problem is I can't do it myself. The spell has to be done for me -- by someone who genuinely loves me.
Ieuan loves me; I know he does. Ieuan is the solution to all my unanswered dreams, and prayers. I wasted so much time, and so many years, looking in the wrong places for happiness. Physically, at least, I can have those years back. Most of them, anyway. I can be younger, better... more attractive. Ieuan will love me even more, I just know it -- and it will be such a relief to not be mistaken for Ieuan's father any more. That's simply humiliating. In spite of the way Ieuan turns those occasions around -- usually by kissing me publically and passionately -- I would much prefer he did not have to put on a public display to convince people we're lovers.
*~*~*~*~*
I took Ieuan into the library, and removed the protections which conceal a hidden panel beneath one of the book cases, so I could show Ieuan the spell I want him to do for me. Still feeling intense guilt for shagging another man, Ieuan would say anything, do anything, to get back into my good books. Guilt can be such a great motivator. Ieuan commented on the rather unusual leather cover of the grimoire, but I told him that asking the type of leather was probably best left unsaid. I opened the book, and let Ieuan read.
My lover's skin, so perfect, and fair, paled as his eyes scanned the text. 'Dillyn, I love you just the way you are,' Ieuan said. It was a statement, and a plea -- I was determined to ignore it.
'Would you deny me this?' I asked, 'Deny me the chance for the happiness I deserve, but never had? The happiness I could have, with you?'
'But Ethan... a sacrifice -- a human sacrifice?'
'And how different is that to what you've already done?' I asked, tilting my head back, slightly, so that the thin, pale scar across my throat stood out in the light. 'You only cheated death, that time...'
'Because I couldn't bear to lose you,' Ieuan said, running one hand across my cheek, then kissing me.
'Because you wanted the power you could make your own, by having me,' I replied, bluntly. 'Don't spoil things being abashed by your own ruthlessness, cariad. You ought to know well enough by now how much it brings me on.'
Ieuan loves me; I know he does. Ieuan is the solution to all my unanswered dreams, and prayers. I wasted so much time, and so many years, looking in the wrong places for happiness. Physically, at least, I can have those years back. Most of them, anyway. I can be younger, better... more attractive. Ieuan will love me even more, I just know it -- and it will be such a relief to not be mistaken for Ieuan's father any more. That's simply humiliating. In spite of the way Ieuan turns those occasions around -- usually by kissing me publically and passionately -- I would much prefer he did not have to put on a public display to convince people we're lovers.
*~*~*~*~*
I took Ieuan into the library, and removed the protections which conceal a hidden panel beneath one of the book cases, so I could show Ieuan the spell I want him to do for me. Still feeling intense guilt for shagging another man, Ieuan would say anything, do anything, to get back into my good books. Guilt can be such a great motivator. Ieuan commented on the rather unusual leather cover of the grimoire, but I told him that asking the type of leather was probably best left unsaid. I opened the book, and let Ieuan read.
My lover's skin, so perfect, and fair, paled as his eyes scanned the text. 'Dillyn, I love you just the way you are,' Ieuan said. It was a statement, and a plea -- I was determined to ignore it.
'Would you deny me this?' I asked, 'Deny me the chance for the happiness I deserve, but never had? The happiness I could have, with you?'
'But Ethan... a sacrifice -- a human sacrifice?'
'And how different is that to what you've already done?' I asked, tilting my head back, slightly, so that the thin, pale scar across my throat stood out in the light. 'You only cheated death, that time...'
'Because I couldn't bear to lose you,' Ieuan said, running one hand across my cheek, then kissing me.
'Because you wanted the power you could make your own, by having me,' I replied, bluntly. 'Don't spoil things being abashed by your own ruthlessness, cariad. You ought to know well enough by now how much it brings me on.'