God is Love
I'd been thinking about the person I gave up for Christ; the girl I used to be. Who was I? Did I even know? I don't think I met myself until I met God. I do remember how I tried to make sense of the world. Just when I thought I had it figured out, there would be one thing that just didn't fit. Or multiple things. I could never get it right.
I wouldn't classify that girl as a leader or a follower. I mean in some ways I led, in some ways I followed. But I remember trying so hard to never fit into any mold. If I thought somebody had me figured out I'd almost immediately try and think of how I could confuse them again. I wanted to confuse people? Well, I was confused too. If somebody was going to know me, I wanted to be the first.
But somebody already did know me. He knew everything about me, stuff I never would have thought of. But I had never met him before. How could somebody I didn't even know know everything about me? Its still hard for me to understand that now.
But you know what? Had it been anybody else who had me figured out, I'd have panicked. But with him... I felt relieved. Finally, somebody understood me in a way no one else could. I didn't have to explain myself; I couldn't if I wanted to. He already knew the feelings I couldn't pinpoint, the words couldn't say.
I was reluctant at first, but rather quickly fell in love. I surprised myself; what was I doing? What was I getting myself into? This isn't me... is it? I'm trying to think of how to describe how that love feels... I can feel it now but I'm convinced that human vocabulary could never put this feeling into words. Truly the only way I can tell you about it is to show you.
Anyways. That love changed me. No... no it didn't change me. It cleansed me. It brought the real me to the surface. I don't have to hide behind layers of dirt and sin because that love made me white as snow. And the beauty of it is that its free to anybody who wants it. You want some free love? Take it!! It's yours for the taking!! Take all you want, and don't hesitate to keep coming back for more! I can share mine with you, but wouldn't you rather have your own plate? It will fill you right up, I promise. You'll never be hungry for love again. If you want it, just ask, and I'll show you where I got mine.
I wouldn't classify that girl as a leader or a follower. I mean in some ways I led, in some ways I followed. But I remember trying so hard to never fit into any mold. If I thought somebody had me figured out I'd almost immediately try and think of how I could confuse them again. I wanted to confuse people? Well, I was confused too. If somebody was going to know me, I wanted to be the first.
But somebody already did know me. He knew everything about me, stuff I never would have thought of. But I had never met him before. How could somebody I didn't even know know everything about me? Its still hard for me to understand that now.
But you know what? Had it been anybody else who had me figured out, I'd have panicked. But with him... I felt relieved. Finally, somebody understood me in a way no one else could. I didn't have to explain myself; I couldn't if I wanted to. He already knew the feelings I couldn't pinpoint, the words couldn't say.
I was reluctant at first, but rather quickly fell in love. I surprised myself; what was I doing? What was I getting myself into? This isn't me... is it? I'm trying to think of how to describe how that love feels... I can feel it now but I'm convinced that human vocabulary could never put this feeling into words. Truly the only way I can tell you about it is to show you.
Anyways. That love changed me. No... no it didn't change me. It cleansed me. It brought the real me to the surface. I don't have to hide behind layers of dirt and sin because that love made me white as snow. And the beauty of it is that its free to anybody who wants it. You want some free love? Take it!! It's yours for the taking!! Take all you want, and don't hesitate to keep coming back for more! I can share mine with you, but wouldn't you rather have your own plate? It will fill you right up, I promise. You'll never be hungry for love again. If you want it, just ask, and I'll show you where I got mine.