--(x_x)--> BOOM. Headshot.
I haven't updated this thing in forever.
I feel like complete crap lately. In fact, I've never felt more completely useless/worthless than I have in my entire life, and the funny thing is, no one takes notice, nor interest. I'm not happy with myself, and I don't like a lot of the people I call my "friends". I hate feeling like I'm the second pick to everyone else, and that's usually what I am. Honestly, the only thing that helps me through all this crap is Allie. I'm starting to feel crappy again because I've talked to her probably 1 full hour in the past 2 or 3 days. I miss her voice. She'll never know how much I care about her, or how much she helps me. I can never put it into words, I just hope she knows that I love her, and I always will no matter what.
Here's something I wrote like...20 minutes ago.
Hope you like it..if you don't...I don't care.
I'd do anything for you
You always needed me
I'd choke till my face turned blue
and fight till I couldn't breathe
This...being said
I pray only for this to end
I take back everything I just said.
and as you watch me walk away
I realize you were never my friend.
I hope you're happy now
Cause I'm not there
it's so unfair..
you never cared.
So don't stare at me
when I sit alone
Not like it matters
but I've unplugged my phone.
This...being said
I pray only for this to end
Feelings have abandoned the words you said
but it's not like they ever meant
half their expense..
=\ Comment.
I feel like complete crap lately. In fact, I've never felt more completely useless/worthless than I have in my entire life, and the funny thing is, no one takes notice, nor interest. I'm not happy with myself, and I don't like a lot of the people I call my "friends". I hate feeling like I'm the second pick to everyone else, and that's usually what I am. Honestly, the only thing that helps me through all this crap is Allie. I'm starting to feel crappy again because I've talked to her probably 1 full hour in the past 2 or 3 days. I miss her voice. She'll never know how much I care about her, or how much she helps me. I can never put it into words, I just hope she knows that I love her, and I always will no matter what.
Here's something I wrote like...20 minutes ago.
Hope you like it..if you don't...I don't care.
I'd do anything for you
You always needed me
I'd choke till my face turned blue
and fight till I couldn't breathe
This...being said
I pray only for this to end
I take back everything I just said.
and as you watch me walk away
I realize you were never my friend.
I hope you're happy now
Cause I'm not there
it's so unfair..
you never cared.
So don't stare at me
when I sit alone
Not like it matters
but I've unplugged my phone.
This...being said
I pray only for this to end
Feelings have abandoned the words you said
but it's not like they ever meant
half their expense..
=\ Comment.